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100,000 Comments! For real.

Time for a little Man Boobz Dance Party: Yesterday, this little blog logged its 100,000th comment. Not page view, comment. (The number of page views is a bit over 2.5 million.) And that’s not even counting the forum.

So let’s have a big round of applause for all the Man Boobz commenters. I couldn’t have done it without you folks! Seriously, since you were the ones writing the comments. I thank you all, trolls and humans alike!

With a typical comment being about 100 words or so (I looked at samples of comments in several different threads and averaged, then rounded it off to a nice simple number), that means you guys have generated more than 10 million words of commentary.

10 freakin million. That’s more than nine times the length of the entire Harry Potter series (1,084,170 words), and almost 7 times the length of Proust’s A la Receherche du Temps Perdu.

If each of these words were a kitty, that would be more kitties than the entire cat population of France.

If each of these words-turned-into-kitties were then turned into a penguin, you’d have more than the entire penguin population of Antarctica.

To celebrate, here’s a video of a cat dressed in a penguin costume, eating fish, a food beloved by both kitties and penguins.

 

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antifeminism crackpottery disgusting women evil women I'm totally being sarcastic men who should not ever be with women ever MGTOW misogyny MRA rapey

Merry War on Christmas, Sisters-in-arms!

Females hate Santa

“Feminists Take Up Arms in War on Christmas.” That’s the headline over on The Spearhead, where W.F. Price tries to spread some good old-fashioned anti-feminist cheer with a post dredging up the old Fox News crapola about a “War on Christmas,” with feminists in the role of villain this time.

His proof of this feminist perfidy? This video on the “Top 5 Creepy and Sexist Christmas Songs.” In it, Anita Sarkeesian of Feminist Frequency takes a critical look at some Christmastime “classics,” including the really quite odious “Baby it’s Cold Outside,” which depicts a man pressuring a woman into staying with him for the night, aggressively shutting down every one of her many objections. The message? Fifty nos and one yes means a yes. It might as well have been written by Reddit’s date-rapey “seduction” experts.

Naturally, the Spearhead regulars offer deeply insightful critiques of all of her main points. DT wades in with a witticism worthy of Wilde:

The reason she hates “Baby It’s Cold Outside” is because no man would ever even dream of trying to stay at her house.

Baby, it’s cold inside, and you’re stuck there alone.

Boxer offers a somewhat broader critique:

Feminists are so far out these days that they resemble bag ladies rather than genuine social critics. Their endless shit opinions take on a comic quality.

Life is wonderful, and life is extra nice without a cunt woman whining in one’s general vicinity. Happy snatch-free holidays, brothers! 🙂

Further proof.

The ever-so-slightly-addled Geography Bee Finalist himself sets forth a theory to explain why feminists might be critical of traditional holidays:

If feminists hate men, and since no holiday comes to mind that can be extricated completely from men, as even the turkey baster needs semen (and men probably invented the centrifuge that sorts X sperm cells and Y sperm cells) so the dyke couple can conceive a kid out of wedlock but in principle cannot celebrate Mother’s Day as fetuses need semen to exist, but Jehovah’s Witnesses expect the FATHER to almost always be the head of the Jehovah’s Witness nuclear family, I wonder what the feminist is left to do.

Oh, that’s right. She is left to not celebrate a single holiday of any religion or country, nor be a Jehovah’s Witness if she wants to have any principle left when it comes to holidays, but then again “feminist principle” is another oxymoron.

Well, all that probably seemed to make more sense echoing inside his empty skull than it does actually written down.

All Keyster’s comment needs is an instant rimshot or two:

You’d think they’d be pleased that a third of the planet celebrates a holiday about a virgin who was able to conceive…without a man!

Or do they believe God raped her?

Eric preaches to the choir:

Feminism envisions either a world without men; or at least one where men are kept in a state of subservient subhumanism. Christmas has to go, along with all other religious holidays and traditional religions. All traditional religions and their associated holidays stress the importance of monogamous marriage and family; and feminists exalt feminine independence, abortion, and misandry.

But it’s Andybob who wins the thread with this unique close reading of the video:

Notice that she says, “downright creepy” at exactly the same moment that an image of a pair of jingle balls appears threateningly above her head. It this a feminist’s sledge-hammer subtle attempt to subliminally associate testicles with creepiness? Lesbians never stop trying to recruit.  

Andy, I’m sure that you, in your own small way, have helped to make this ongoing lesbian recruitment drive a little bit more successful.

 

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Sady Doyle on “Fighting Sexual Assault, One Tweet at a Time”

Upvoted!

Sady Doyle of Tiger Beatdown fame has a great piece up at In These Times on the ways in which the Internet has helped to highlight virulent and violent misogyny — and inspire effective feminist pushback. It’s actually kind of … inspiring? (That’s a word I don’t use often!)  Here’s the opening:

When a history of 21st-century feminist activism is someday written, 2011 may be labeled Year Rape Broke. Sexual assault and harassment have, of course, always been key feminist concerns. But in 2011, sexual violence, exploitation, or intimidation were part of nearly every major story that fell under the heading of “women’s issues”–and the activism against it has been particularly widespread, focused and effective.

As we enter this renaissance of sexual assault awareness, it’s worth considering the ways in which new media has informed it–and, indeed, perhaps even made it possible. …

You can read the rest on the In These Times website.

Full disclosure: I worked at ITT for a couple of years in the 90s (yes, I’m old), and Sady says some nice things about Man Boobz in the piece.

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antifeminism creepy evil women I'm totally being sarcastic misandry misogyny MRA none dare call it conspiracy oppressed men paul elam threats

AgentOrange and the Screencaps of Feminazi Doom

Santa is no longer interested in bringing joy to girls.

Christmas came early for the MRAs this year. Earlier this week, a generous soul calling himself AgentOrange posted a 165 MB present online for them, an assortment of super-secret internet postings from a private forum connected to the RadFem Hub, which Mr. Orange collected by bravely going behind enemy lines and, er, screencapping a bunch of shit. As the OFFICIAL PRESS RELEASE declared:

[B]oth feminists and MRAs alike, have been anxiously awaiting the promised complete files of screen shots and associated materials collected by Agent Orange.

These files are apparently so vile and incendiary that Mr. Orange has deemed it necessary to reveal the personal information of some of the RadFemHub commenters. Not to encourage anyone to stalk or harass or harm them, just so that those offended by them can do whatever it is people do when personal info is leaked on the internet that doesn’t involve stalking or harassing or harming them. Send them postcards?

But in any case there is no reason whatsoever to think that a group of really really really angry people who love making threats on the internet and  think their opponents are as bad as Hitler could ever do anything that would be in any way problematic.

So, you might ask, what dastardly secrets do these new files disclose? Oddly, the PRESS RELEASE doesn’t actually specify. The AgentOrange website doesn’t say either. And the 165 MB download is just a bunch of files with no explanation.

But I have spent some time going through these files myself in a completely random manner, which is evidently what AgentOrange expects everyone who downloads the files to do. To be perfectly honest, I haven’t spent that much time on this. I’ve really been quite busy with other things. But I have spent some time. More than twenty minutes, anyway.

So let me share with you some preliminary findings.

Here, straight from the AgentOrange files, are some RadFems discussing a news story about a male midwife who thinks that mothers should embrace the pain of childbirth as a “rite of passage.” (Click on the teensy image on the right to get it full-sized.)

Apparently some of those RadFems don’t think this is a good idea! One of them says:

Does he even know what uterine cramps/contractions even feel like?

Another adds:

I read that and rolled my eyes. … If only it were possible to subject mister midwife (my ass) to the joyous pain of childbirth. I guess a swift kick to the balls is as close as he’s ever going to come to it.

Clearly suggesting that a male midwife suffer pain similar to what he suggests women should suffer is nothing short of GENOCIDE!

But wait, there’s more! Another woman writes:

There is no reason why women should have to endure pain like this in this day and age.

That sounds exactly like something HITLER would have said! (If you replace “women” with “Jews” and “no reason” with “every reason.”)

Still another adds:

This is phenomenally stupid, and completely out of step with current pain management theory and procedures.

Is there no end to this feminazi depravity!?

Oh, but there’s more, much more. In this thread — click the image to the right — the evil RadFems complain about guys trying to pick them up in a creepy manner. One of the ladies suggests that a good way to get the guys to leave you alone is to tell them you’re a widow.

You see now that feminism is all about DECEPTION!

Maybe it should be called Deceptionism!

Ok, ok, just one more. In a thread called “I’m mad as hell” — right over there on the right again — one commenter complains about getting a computer virus.

She’s so mad she says she’s even considering downloading Ubuntu and forgoing all Microsoft products, which are frequently targets of viruses! What? Huh? DOES NOT COMPUTE. BZZZZZZZ. LADY USING LINUX ERROR ERROR. *$^*$()*%(*$$$$$$$$. EMERGENCY SHUTDOWN.

CARRIER.

REBOOTING.

FLUSHING CACHE.

Ok. I’m back. Another commenter there says something about castrating guys who write viruses.

That does seem a little excessive. Though I don’t think she means it literally.

I will return to this topic later, after I recover.

In the meantime, if you want to see the most ridiculous comments on the matter from Reddit’s Men’s Rightsers, you can find some of them collected together here. Among the highlights:

Violence on men is incited daily, by the hour, by the second. Every time someone makes a post on reddit there is a sexist opinion about all men.

This isn’t public shaming, its outing criminals that are planning your genocide.

A story of a plan of naziesque proportions is about to broken.

I think we can all agree that feminism inevitably heads down the road of male genocide.

MRAs, more melodramatic than emo kids.

Oh, and by the way, two of the Reddit quotes above come from a fellow known on Reddit as Sigi1, but who may be more familiar to Man Boobzers as Eoghan. Without clicking on the links, can you guess which two?

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“I hope this advice doesn’t sound rapey … ” A visit to Reddit’s “seduction” community.

If you wonder why some dudes get so worked up about “false rape accusations,” it may be because their notion of “seduction” is pretty much indistinguishable from what most of us would call “date rape.” And chances are good that they sort of know this.

Check out this discussion in Reddit’s Seduction subreddit, recently highlighted in ShitRedditSays.

The original poster writes in with a heartrending tale: it seems he can’t get the ladies to touch his penis. Throw5891away writes:

So I have little problem getting numbers, little trouble turning those numbers into dates, I can keep her interested during dates, but i can’t make the move to anything physical beyond a kiss or some light making out.

Let’s have the deets!

A lot of my problem, I think, comes from the fear of possibly making it awkward. I’ve been in a few situations where i’ve tried to slide a hand down the pants of a girl and she turns timid. This is after some over-clothes touching, or pressure with my thigh. Warming them up, i think, is not the major problem. Obviously if a girl says no, i’m not going to push through with it because that’s when it gets awkward.

Yes, trying to stick your fingers in a woman’s vagina when she doesn’t want you to does tend to get a  little … awkward.

Beyond me failing at making a first move, it’s nearly impossible for me to get a girl to notice I have an erection and attempt to do something about it.

Maybe you need to wear a t-shirt that says “erection” on it with a big arrow pointing to your crotch? Otherwise how on earth are the ladies you’re making out with ever going to realize you have a boner?

I’m average in size there, so them not noticing is not an issue. I feel like I almost have to physically take their hand and place it on my junk in order to make it happen. And after a while of them paying no attention to my erection (mind you, they’re still gropey elsewhere/into making out), it really starts to make wonder if they’re really into having sex with me at all.

It seems you might just be onto something here. And how on earth can you possibly tell if a woman actually, for real, wants to have sex with you? It’s not like you can ask her directly, because she has the power of speech, or anything like that.

Instead, you’d better ask the dudes on r/seduction. So let’s just see what they have to say.

PuaCurveBall suggests that the best way to avoid the “awkwardness” spoken of earlier is just to ignore it:

I hope this advice doesn’t sounds rapey, but you need to keep going until they seriously tell you no.

Pro-tip: Any bit of advice that starts off with “I hope this advice doesn’t sound rapey” is advice you SHOULD NOT FOLLOW.

Them not telling you firmly to stop (more than just “we shouldn’t be doing this” or “it is too soon”) is the signal. Escalate until they tell you to stop.

Yes, because “we shouldn’t be doing this” is such an ambiguous statement. It could mean anything! It probably is just girl-code for “we should be doing this, so please grab my hand and put it on your dick.”

Either you should get a firm “no, seriously get your hands off me, I’m not ready yet” or you should be having sex with these girls. Everything in the middle is working against you.

So long as she doesn’t literally mace you, you can assume she actually wants you to keep going.

Naturally, the suave Lotherios of the r/seduction community rewarded this sensible advice with upvotes.

Others offered similar advice. Productionx was insistent: “No” means “keep going!”

Women want a man to be dominate. Other women lead you to believe you have to ask for permission, don’t listen to these stupid feminists. Go be a man, if she says no, you say ok, and keep doing exactly what you were doing. You get an erection, make it freaking known!!!

Fangs78 added:

Don’t give up before like the 9-10th time they stop you. Of course, if they are stern and REALLY mean it.

Everyone knows that the first 9 or 10 “no’s” really mean “maybe.”

It’s all part of the art of “seduction.”

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Homeless girls: A frugal alternative to pricey prostitutes!

NOTE: The title of this post is sarcastic. If you found this post through a Google search because you’re actually looking for tips on how to exploit desperate young women, you’re a piece of shit, and this post is not for you. Go away, and go fuck yourself.

Fellas! Want sex, but don’t have the money to shell out on prostitutes? Hate the time and effort it takes to talk a non-professional sex-having women into having sex with you? A recent post by Advocatus Diaboli on the always delightful In Mala Fide offered an elegant solution for horny but frugal men. In a post titled Pooning on a Tight Budget, AD explained the technique that has worked for him:

Getting poor, but good-looking, young girls (18-23) to have sex with [you] in return for some timely financial help.

Turns out that women who are poor and desperate can be exploited for your own sexy purposes!

Of course, it’s not always quite as easy as it might seem.

I should be upfront that getting amateur women to have sex for money can be tricky as most of them believe that they are not whores. Moreover, poor young women often have “boyfriends” and white knight orbiters. So I created a set of filters and rules to screen out the most problematic types.

According to AD, all you have to do is to:

Avoid all girls who have obvious and serious drug and mental health issues or have lived on the street for over 6 weeks at a stretch.

Happily for you, that still leaves lots of girls ripe for the picking! AD suggests you focus your attention on:

Freshly homeless young girls, especially those who hangout in mixed groups.

The safest ones are those who are into pot, drumming, dreadlocks et cetera. You can find them in many larger cities in the spring and summer. While I would never trust them with any significant amount of money, many are reasonably decent human beings.

You might not think you’d have much in common to talk about with these women – what with them being “reasonably decent human beings” and you being a “completely reprehensible pile of shit” – but you’d be surprised.

Strike up a conversation with them, engage them and see where it leads. But you must make it plainly obvious that you are interested in them sexually, but that all favors require reciprocation. Once you get to know them, a decent round of drinks, snacks, money for pot, a small necessary item of clothing, decent dinner with booze will almost guarantee you a good lay (or at least a couple of BJs).

And if you crunch the numbers you’ll see it’s really quite a frugal solution.

Your initial financial hit for hanging out with them is very small, and once they are sleeping with you.. it will often work to about $30-60 (cash equivalent or cash) per session. You may also get freebies..

But girls don’t necessarily have to be literally homeless to be desperate enough to sleep with you for money. Nope! You may also find great cost-savings from targeting:

Girls who are not homeless, but are just hanging on.

How do you find these lovely ladies? Keep an eye out for women working really shitty jobs that don’t pay shit! You’ll find them conveniently located

in smaller retail stores or businesses that pay minimum wage with no tips. Build a rapport and be fairly upfront about your interest, but do not come across as desperate. Go to her workplace and talk to her when you are in that area, but do not stalk her.

Yep, it turns out that even desperate women can be creeped out. So play it cool! Stalking’s for fools!

There’s another possible hurdle: other dudes.

Such women often have “boyfriends,” however, they are often just as poor or poorer than her. You can get pussy as long as you are firm about the need for reciprocation. This category of girls might be more willing to give BJs than having ‘real sex.’ But do you really care?

Just remember to keep to your budget!

Restrict your help to less than $200 at any one time AND only after she has put out a couple of times.

And then there’s AD’s favorite category of desperate women:

Girls who are poor, but not homeless and have no “boyfriends” + have moved to the city within the last eight weeks.

You have hit the jackpot! 

Just don’t get carried away. Remember: you’re in charge, and she should know it!

Remember these girls can become de facto GFs, but do not restrict yourself to one. While you do not have to rub it in their faces, they should know that you are always looking around for a better deal. But treat them a bit better than type 1 and 2, they do give more per dollar spent on them.

Your accountant will be so, so proud of you!

Just remember:

They will play by your rules as long as they are not too dehumanizing, and they are often cheaper than professional whores.

Now that’s a motto to live by!

Amazingly, not all of the readers of In Mala Fide appreciated AD’s little treatise.

Simon invoked the c-word, before tossing in some racism:

Mate you are one deadset sad cunt. It’s no surprise to know you’re Indian.

Cathater broke out the other c-word:

Pretty damn creepy. You sound like you have no soul. Actually, you might be the first member of a new species: the perfectly rational, purely selfish utility-maximizing agent (Homo Economicus) that Austrian economists and Randroids have always droned on and on about.

Yes, I was as surprised as you are to read an actually reasonable critique of the post on In Mala Fide.

Don’t worry, though, the rest of the comments mostly lived up to the foul standards of the blog.

Ryu worried about the old slippery slope. If you start by suggesting that PUAs target homeless women, the next thing you know they’ll advocate sex with children! And then down the slippery slope you’ll slide:

This is the direction that PU takes one in. I’m surprised that there haven’t been any PUAs who say that during a dry spell we should go to gay bars and pick up men. Just to keep your dick wet, you know.

Savrola returned to the theme of race:

There’s a problem WNs have yet to deal with. Well off second-generation foreigners like AD taking advantage of your impoverished women of older native stock, after they’ve taken your jobs.

Can’t keep ‘em here, can’t send ‘em back.

What to do?

Blog proprietor Ferdinand Bardamu waded in to take a shot at all the “white knights” sticking up for the gals.

ROFLMAO at all these white knights. …

If you want to blame someone, blame the morally debased white women who would rather blow a stranger for $200 then work honestly (pull yourself up by your bootstraps, slob! nobody owes you anything!).

We’re living in Soviet Amerika (and Soviet Kanada). All of your daughters are whores or will become whores, soon as the price tag gets high enough.

Meanwhile, Stoner With a Boner, who sometimes graces the comments section here with his always trenchant wisdom, took a stand on behalf of the real victims here: dudes paying their own hard-earned money to icky ladies for sex.

Personally, I find the idea of clocking more hours at a job I hate just to hand $200 to a prostitute who would probably leave me dying in the street rather than help degrading.

Men, the forgotten victims once again.

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Gay men! Fear the lesbobo fempocalypse!

Gay men, stop falling for these man-hating ladies!

Gay men, when will you learn that feminists are fickle friends? Christian J. – the blogger behind What Men Are Saying About Women and the inventor of the MRA two-dot ellipses – offers gay men a trenchant warning about the evils of these seemingly friendly “allies.”

Fascinating how gay men are of the opinion that they are seen as humans where feminists are concerned. I am not quite certain how many more times we have to demonstrate that feminists loathe gays, with a passion, the male type ofcourse, not the lesbobo version..

Yes, obviously the lesbobos — much like lesbos, but with twice as much bo — have no problem with male hating. But gay men need to open their eyes to what is really going on.

Feminists have jumped aboard the Gay Rights Movement in order to spread their own male hating message. A message that the Gay Community appears to ignore. When feminists call for the removal of all men, the Gay man is definitely not exempted, I cannot understand how they can be in denial of  that fact, that certainty..

Also, that whole “gay marriage” thing you guys are always on about is really kind of pointless, since the evil ladies have already ruined marriage for everyone:

Feminists are only concerned about destroying marriage and families and the Gay community can help there as well by demanding that marriage should be renounced as null and void.

Of course, the lesbobos love feminism, and vice versa. Or at least they profess to:

Feminism and feminists only support lesbianism as most of the radical feminists are lesbians and they possess sufficient toxicity and male hate in order to spread their anti male loathing. They attached themselves to any movement they think they will have some advantage or benefit to spreading their elitist, sexist message..

But gay men?

Ignore these warning at your own peril. Feminists will dump you faster than typhoid when they have achieved their own outcomes. It’s that simple..

FIGHT THE TWIN EVILS OF LESBOBOS AND FEMINISMISM!

TWO DOTS GOOD, THREE DOTS BAD!

IGNORE THESE WARNING AT YOUR OWN PERIL!

 

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$MONEY$ beta males evil women I'm totally being sarcastic men who should not ever be with women ever MGTOW misogyny

Fellas! Protect yourself from these sneaky lady tricks!

Some of them start young.

Courtesy of MGTOWforums.com, here’s a little collection of some of the evil dastardly tricks that women pull on the poor oppressed men of the world. Obviously, most sensible guys know that “housework” is a scam; so-called “housewives” spend most of their time on the couch eating bon bons and watching The View.

But did you know about Arson Night? Or the Cheerleader Ring Drop? Read on, and become enlightened Knowledge is power! STAY SAFE, GUYS!

The old 60/40 split:

If a man give his woman 100 dollars a week for food shopping, she will spend say 60 on food and keep the rest. When he enquires why there’s no food in the house come Friday he will get bitched at for not trusting her. And made to feel guilty for accusing her, even though she has deceived him.

Sickbed slutty sexting:

They like to lay in bed, and pretend to be sick or sad (which means you won’t be coming in there) and text all their boyfriends.

Arson Night With the Girls:

When they say they are going out with the girls, they could be out doing Anything. This ranges from doing hard drugs to stripping to boinking strangers to sitting alone on a curb to arson. You can never be sure.

Lady I N C E P T I O N

How about when they try their version of the Jedi mind trick on you. You know the thing they brag about in private. Trying to make something that’s her idea, seem like it’s *your* idea so that you’ll do it. And then pat you on the back to boost your ego like a trained dog when in reality you did what they for *them* all along.

Sooo many guys fall for this. Suddenly they’re buying crap they don’t need or moving the inlaws in because the woman made it seem like *he* wanted it. Classic.

Short Hair: The Beginning of the End

Women spend so much time on their appearance… why?

That’s right, to catch a sucker into paying the bills. Once the contract is signed, and the babies are popped out, she has you by the balls and doesn’t need to pretend anymore. Next she’ll wear more “comfortable clothes” and cut her hair short. It’s the beginning of the end.

And, yes, The Cheerleader Ring Drop:

In 11th grade high school, I was in the wrestling team. One day, during a water break, this cheerleader next to me started getting panicky and asked me if i could help her find her ring. She “dropped” it and did this just as an opener, i suppose. I ended up ‘being’ with her and it quickly diminished; she was bunk. Another cheerleader came up to me while i was with her and told me “what are you doing her?, you’re way too good for her!”

Luckily, the fella calling himself Tha Big Daddy C-Master, who started the thread, has a simple solution to all this. Well, two simple solutions:

You can always turn the other way, or just use a woman. Human toilets and all.

I couldn’t have said it worse myself!

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alpha males antifeminism homophobia misogyny reactionary bullshit that's not funny! the spearhead

Christopher Hitchens is no more, yet women remain unfunny: The Spearhead pays tribute

Hitch also enjoyed smoking.

As you may have heard, Christopher Hitchens – writer, drinker, atheist, shit-stirrer – died the other day. He’s gotten tributes from people all over the political spectrum. Over on The Spearhead, the fellows are paying tribute to his life. Well, not so much his life as to his opinion that women just aren’t funny – apparently their vaginas get in the way, or something.

Here a fellow named Rocco offers his fond remembrances of the man:

I applaud him and wish him to be considered by the big man upstairs to have done the world a service by publically opposing the political machine that is feminism by telling a simple truth.

Woman aren’t funny and men do alot of the great stuff they do like music, art and war to impress women.

Maybe this is why women will never invent anything, why bother.

Twenty upvotes and one downvote for that. Presumably that one downvote is from God, who’s probably spent the last couple of days just going around downvoting anything positive said about Hitchens.

Keyster elaborated further:

His point being that not only do women not need to be funny to attract men, they don’t need to do anything else but simply be women; dress nicely, wear a little make up and perfume – – pleasant personality or the ability to engage in substantive conversation is completely optional.

Everything men strive for is to attract more women.

Everything women strive for is to be more like men.

See the conflict?

Attila added this:

This Cuntry has become so PC- that it couldn’t produce someone like Hitchens- as much as I may disagree with some of his views. He had a functioning mind- and an evidently rigorous education. Can anyone name anybody like him in the public arena? The fact he could throw words like “dyke” around with ease in the middle of his perorations shows a great deal of confidence (he wouldn’t let himself be bullied).

Hitch, this part of your legacy lives on!

But it’s a little-noticed comment from Nutz that highlights Hitch’s most impressive accomplishment:

Well, he was drunk in a lot of his interviews. Personally I thought he was great and one of the things that made him remarkable–he’d be drunk in an interview or debate and still soundly spank the other person with his wit.

Whether you loved him or hated him, agreed with him or disagreed with him, you’ve got to admit: he somehow managed to accomplish more while staggeringly drunk than most of us accomplish stone-cold sober. And that’s something, I guess.

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Dudes: silent no more!

This tiny kitten actually has nothing to do with the post.

Did Tom Matlack of the Good Men Project – not to be confused with Ben Matlock, fictional defense lawyer beloved by the elderly – swallow one of those mysterious “red pills” I keep hearing about on Men’s Rights blogs? Whatever he swallowed, it’s apparently causing him to hallucinate.

How else to explain his recent post on the GMP site titled “Being a Dude Is a Good Thing.” Now, as a dude who spends a good deal of time every day being a dude, I’ve got nothing against anyone being a dude, provided that’s what they want to be. It’s just that the piece itself is full of some rather strange generalizations that don’t actually seem to be, you know, true, at least not in what’s commonly known as “the real world.”

Rather than try to rebut his argument, because he doesn’t seem to have much of one, let’s just look at some of his loopier pronouncements:

Why do men get blamed for everything?

Uh, because they don’t? Sure, men get blamed for things, but guess what? Women get blamed for things all the time, too, from witchcraft, to divorce, to getting themselves raped, battered or killed. They’ve been blamed for earthquakes, for “inciting” male lust, for killing chivalry and “killing off real men,” for “taking roles intended by God only for men.” Heck, some inventive sorts have even figured out how to blame women for men who are assholes. And this guy has decided that “Black Women are to blame for the disrespect Black Men show towards Black Women.” For endless additional examples, scroll back through the posts and comments here, visit any of the blogs on my “boob roll,” or simply continue living on planet earth.

Back to Matlack, whose generalizations get more surreal by the sentence:

In the locker room, in the bathroom, on the walk out of the board room, in my conversations with men of all kinds, that’s what I hear more than anything. The resignation that to be a man is to be unacceptable at some level to the woman in your life.

Really? Who on earth are you hanging out with? And what women are they hanging out with? Are men other than Tom Matlack and his possibly apocryphal conversational partners actually having conversations like this on a regular basis? If the “woman in your life” basically hates men, what is she doing with you, and what are you doing with her?

One close friend jokes, “When speaking to my wife I always make sure to look at the ground in deference. And I make sure not to make any sudden movements.”

Um, what?

I’ve watched him. He loves his wife.

He’s a very competent human being. But with her he’s decided the only way to survive is to submit. The female view is the right view. The male view just gets you into trouble.

You see what I meant before about the hallucinations, right?

But Matlack suggests there is hope for the poor demure, never-before-heard-from men of the world. Apparently they are starting to open their mouths at last.

It seems that the blame game in the mainstream, whether through the minimization of male life in pop culture or on television or through the continued obsession with men behaving badly, has finally struck a chord with the average guy.

Let’s just pause a moment to reflect on this whole “minimization of male life in pop culture or on television.” Mr. Matlack, do you actually watch movies or television, or visit libraries or anything like that? Most movies revolve around men as the main characters, with women in many cases serving as little more than a love interest or simply as scenery. Have you ever heard of the Bechdel test? Read up on it, run the test on some of your favorite films, and then get back to us on the “minimization of male life in pop culture.”

Now back to Matlack’s manifesto:

We are no longer willing to be blamed for being men. We are no longer willing to avert our gazes and stay silent about our feelings. We are raising our voices and telling our stories in our own male vocabulary.

Yeah, because men have been so utterly silent about their feelings, their opinons, and pretty much everything, up until now.

To women, I assume the response is, “well, it’s about time.” But just remember when we talk it’s not going to sound like a women in a man’s body. It’s gonna be all dude. And you are just going to have to deal with that.

Ladies, prepare yourselves for a lot more Dudesplaining in the near future.  Dudes will be ignored no longer! Dudes!!! DUUUUUDESSS!!!!!!

EDITED TO ADD: Matlack’s gotten some responses on Twitter to his dudely roar; he’s posted a bunch of them here. Guest appearances by Amanda Marcotte and (seriously) Roseanne Barr.