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I’m too much of a nice guy to succeed with the toilets, er, women I want to murder, incel explains

Women: Not actually toilets

Life is tough for nice guys in our cold, hard world. Consider this poor fellow I found posting on

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Well that took a turn: “Nice Guy” stories gone bad

Be careful, dudes; don’t give yourself whiplash

So here are a few little tales I found on Reddit that sound like they were directed by M. Night Shyamalan ; you’ll want to read them until their ends, as that’s where the real magic happens.

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Two Nice Guys enter the ring; one leaves. But who will it be?

Today, two Nice Guys face off against one another in a slap fight for the ages. Who will win, Mr. Worse Than the Holocaust or Mr. Vaginal Cavity?

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Worst Uber alternative ever

cat driving a car
By contrast, this is the best Uber alternative ever

Here’s a fellow with new take on the old slogan “gas, grass or ass.”

I have 3 jobs, ask me. Griffith University A Lives in Alexandra Hills 0 38 kilometres away 
About me 
If you ever need a ride home from work, save your money send me a message I'll come and pick you up and take you home. All I ask for in return is that you suck me off and let me play with you during the trip, the goal is to make me cum before we arrive at your destination otherwise I get to fuck you to finish off

The one thing that makes this a little more bearable is the virtual certainty that he has never gotten a positive response to this Tinder profile.

H/T — r/NiceGuys; I disguised the guy’s face in the pic.

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Top 5 Nice Guys who really aren’t so nice after all

How is it that so many self-proclaimed nice guys turn out to be so terrible?

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MGTOWs celebrate the death of Ruth Bader Ginsburg in their own inimitable way

Somehow it’s always all about them

Some Men Going Their Own Way are reacting to news of Ruth Bader Ginsburg’s death with a certain malicious glee. “Ding Dong the Witch is Dead,” writes one fellow in the MGTOW subreddit. “HAHAHA prayers do work, now let’s end abortion,” responds another.

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This Nice Guy has some complaints about the sex distribution system

Please, miss, just a crumb?

Ah, the Nice Guy, perpetually confused that women aren’t vending machines that dole out a serving of sex for every five kindness tokens you insert in them.

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Creepiest “Friend Zone” meme I’ve seen in a long time

Wait, what?

And this is why the notion of the “friend zone” is so damn toxic.

The comment below the meme seems pretty accurate to me, though.

H/T — r/GamerGhazi

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Quoth the friendzoned, f**king whore: Edgar Allan Bro takes on a Nice Guy with an ax

Careful with that ax, Eugene

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I‘m not sure who drew the cartoon above, depicting the travails of a long-suffering “nice guy” as he tries to break down the emotional wall put up by a woman he has a crush on an obsession with.

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Memeday: Cucked by Princess Peach

Cucked again, by a Bowser cosplayer no less
Cucked again, by a Bowser cosplayer no less

It’s good to know that Men’s Rights Activists are taking on the issues that truly matter the most to men — like fictional princesses cucking “nice guys” in the plumbing business.

I found the meme above on A Voice for Men’s Facebook page, with this explanation:

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