Categories
evil sexy ladies male supremacy men who should not ever be with women ever misogyny NoFap precious bodily fluids reddit semen

How to become the Warren Buffett of ejaculation, according to some semen-retaining weirdo on Reddit

*makes jerkoff motion*

By David Futrelle

Today, some handy investment advice from … the semen retention subreddit?

Categories
'bating cringe evil sexy ladies irony alert men who should not ever be with women ever misogyny NoFap not a cult precious bodily fluids reddit semen

Fellas! Don’t let the temptresses get their hands on your cup of everlasting spooge power, Reddit NoFapper warns


Never give the temptresess what they want (your spooge)

By David Futrelle

Sometimes I get the sense that Reddit’s most-devoted semen retainters — the guys who give up both masturbation and sex in order to protect the mystical power of their pent-up love goo — aren’t just embarking on a slightly odd form of supposed self-improvement.

Categories
'bating crackpottery entitled babies evil sexy ladies imaginary oppression irony alert men who should not ever be with women ever MGTOW misogyny NoFap not a cult penises precious bodily fluids pron reddit semen

MGTOW Redditor: “Any woman you encounter is possibly a Succubus. Make no mistake, it wants your semen”

Women out there just being succubi now

By David Futrelle

It’s succubus time again here at We Hunted the Mammoth. Over the years, I’ve run across more than a few weirdo misogynists obsessed with the notion of women as succubi, those (I think) mythical sex demons who disguise themselves as beautiful women in order to seduce men and steal their sexual energy, if not their very souls.

Categories
alt-right anti-Semitism drama kings irony alert men who should not ever be with women ever misogyny NoFap not a cult penises precious bodily fluids reddit semen

Today I Learned: I’m an agent of the Globalist Media elite personally tasked with destroying the Semen Retention subreddit

Just doing my job

By David Futrelle

For the past few months I’ve been mildly obsessed with the Semen Retention subreddit, a sort of harder-core alternative to the bigger NoFap subreddit, full of earnest men convinced that if they can just keep their hands off their dingles for a long enough time they’ll gain quasi-magical powers and become irresistibly attractive to women. Their collective ideology is a weird mixture of pseudoscience, occultism, Eastern woo, and Red Pill misogyny, with a dollop of old-fashioned antisemitism occasionally tossed into the mix for flavor. For a connoisseur of weird misogyny like me, what’s not to love?

Categories
'bating bad anatomy cool story bro cringe galaxy brain men who should not ever be with women ever misogyny NoFap penises reddit semen

‘Cause every girl crazy ’bout a semen-filled man: Alleged true tales from the Semen Retention subreddit

Sorry ladies, but I have to deny you my essence

By David Futrelle

The Semen Retention subreddit is a weird place to visit, filled both with arcane manifestos on the spiritual awakenings that supposedly come from never having orgasms, ever, and enthusiastic testimonials from sperm-filled dudes convinced that their onanistic disipline has caused all the women in their immediate vicinity to lust for them like cats in heat, even though actually having sex with one of these women would destroy their no-orgasm streak and, they fear, transform them back into average schmoes again.

Categories
'bating /pol/ 4chan alt-right anti-Semitism creepy evil sexy ladies irony alert men who should not ever be with women ever misogyny NoFap none dare call it conspiracy porn precious bodily fluids reddit semen

Creepy Nazi NoFapper: The Jews “fear men who practice semen retention”

Hitler sadly acknowledging the end of a 20-day NoFap streak

By David Futrelle

The other day I introduced you to DiceRollah, a Man Going His Own Way who is also a hardcore semen-retainer who thinks that giving up masturbation and sex will thwart the evil womens out there trying to steal his “life force” and prevent him from being the sort of awesome dude who, in our caveman days, would have been out there “doing fantastic works of cave art or slaying woolly mammoths.”

Categories
'bating actual mammoths evil sexy ladies imaginary oppression men who should not ever be with women ever MGTOW misogyny NoFap precious bodily fluids reddit semen

Women drain men’s life force (semen) and prevent them from hunting mammoths, MGTOW Redditor warns unironically

Semen-filled prehistoric MGTOWs doing some manly man stuff

By David Futrelle

Be still my heart! I’ve discovered a man who is, simultaneously, 1) a Redditor, 2) a MGTOW, 3) a NoFap dude with weird theories about semen who 4) literally wants to go out and hunt mammoths.

Categories
'bating bad science irony alert men who should not ever be with imaginary women ever misogyny NoFap penises playing the victim reddit sex

When you jerk off, you’re literally schtupping a sex demon, Christian NoFapper explains

The Devil made me jerk it

By David Futrelle

The NoFap movement has always been home to a certain amount of mystical woo.

Categories
'bating memes NoFap TROOOLLLL!!

Reach out and we will beat it together: Russian troll farm inadvertently creates the greatest NoFap meme ever

Reaching out

By David Futrelle

I‘m not normally a big fan of Russian troll farms. But this wondrous little NoFap meme from Russia’s infamous Internet Research Agency has me reconsidering my position.

Categories
'bating alt-right dude you've got no fucking idea what you're talking about evil sexy ladies literal nazis men who should not ever be with women ever misogyny NoFap precious bodily fluids pron reddit

Feminists push porn to make men weak through excessive masturbation, NoFap conspiracy theorist explains

He used to be an alpha dog. Them he got addicted to porn

The WHTM PLEDGE DRIVE is almost over! WHTM is ad free and entirely dependent on folks like you for its continued existence. If you appreciate it, please DONATE HERE NOW! Thanks!

By David Futrelle

NoFappers — they call themselves fapstronauts — give up masturbating to porn because they’ve convinced themselves that it drains them of their “life force” and makes them lethargic and dull-witted.