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“Cum is Murder,” explains dude who missed a day in sex ed

So today a Redditor went to the relationship_advice subreddit with an important question: “why does coming to ejaculate matter so much that I lose relationships because I choose not to ejaculate but let my sexual partner have orgasms. (Archived here.)

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“The umbilical chord [sic] does not directly connect to the woman” and other uterine insights from some dumbass politician

Where babies actually come from

It’s not news that many men are a bit confused about what goes on down there in cis women — that is, in the general area where babies are made, from conception to childbirth.

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5 completely cockeyed myths about sperm

There’s liquid gold in them thar balls

Sperm is in the news again. On Friday, as some of you may know already, Utah state Rep. Karianne Lisonbee (a Republican, naturally) offered her take on the always controversial topic, suggesting to the press that women should feel just fine in the post-Roe age because they can control the “intake of semen” into their bodies:

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Six completely incorrect facts I learned about boobs on the internet

I’m pretty sure this is incorrect also

Straight cis guys have a lot of theories about female breasts, many of which they are happy to explain at length online, even without being asked. Unfortunately some of these theories are incorrect, sometimes wildly so. Here are six that don’t pass the truth test.

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Well, this is the worst thing I’ve read all week

This … thing … has been making the rounds on Reddit. Originally posted in r/confessions, it was quickly deleted, but lives on as a screenshot elsewhere on the site. An unusual query from some dude who should probably never be allowed to have sex, it really is the worst thing I’ve read this horrible week.

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Semen is “the real Elixir of the human body,” so DO NOT WASTE IT even if you sort of want to, like REALLY want to, and I mean would it be that big a deal if you did?

Always protect your balls

The guys in the Semen Retention subreddit are just really, really, really into their own semen “the real Elixir of the human body.”

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WARNING for water-drinking cervix-havers (and cervix-having water-drinkers) but not for water-drinking cervixes

Remember to check BOTH of your cervixes!

On this lazy Saturday I’m gathering together a little collection of mansplainations I found catalogued on Reddit.

First, a public service announcement for uterus-having water-drinkers. Be careful out there!

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“Ejaculating outside a vagina is cheating against nature,” and other uninsightful insights I found in the Semen Retention subreddit

Don’t waste your precious bodily fluids

I‘ve been rooting around in the Semen Retention subreddit again, and the insights I’m gaining about the wondrous power of my precious bodily fluids … well, they’re actually pretty terrible and I’m fairly certain that none of them are true.

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If she can pick up pencils with her hoo-hah, she’s probably not a virgin, and other vaginal insights from dudes who don’t have one

Note: If your vulva looks like this, see a doctor immediately

Today, some vaginal wisdom from dudes who do not have vaginas of their own, which might have helped with the fact-checking.

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Artificial wombs will render women obsolete, explains dude who clearly missed a day in biology class

Sperm is all you need?

Here’s another Red Pill dude who seems to have taken Sex Ed in the late 17th century, back when scientists thought that babies developed from tiny homunculi living inside sperm cells, meaning that women were at most mere incubators of life, not the co-creators.

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