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Return of Kings urges Red Pillers to take up arms in case Donald Trump is assassinated

Praise The Donald and pass the ammunition?
Praise The Donald and pass the ammunition?

I used to be a fairly regular watcher of Doomsday Preppers, the NatGeo “reality” show profiling a motley assortment of paranoid goofballs preparing themselves (and their sometimes enthusiastic, sometimes resentful families) in their own unique ways for what they saw as the impending end of the world.

One thing that was striking about the show was that each of the doomsday preppers was preparing for a different doomsday.

Some were expecting fairly standard-issue apocalypses involving things like giant earthquakes, economic collapses or worldwide pandemics; others were more, well, creative, worrying about solar flares and, in one case, a shift in the earth’s magnetic poles, which the prepper in question thought would send the continents themselves skittering around the globe.

Now the folks at right-wing garbage site Return of Kings are talking about their own version of doomsday, which they think could be caused not by some giant natural disaster but by the assassination of Donald Trump. 

In a post suffused with melodramatic paranoia, RoK contributor David Garrett Brown urges his fellow Red Pillers to stock up on guns, food and medicine in order to prepare for what he predicts will be a period of  “panic and craziness that will follow an attack on Trump.”

Never mind that an assassination is highly unlikely, to put it mildly. Never mind that the United States has survived the assassination of several presidents, as well a civil rights giant Martin Luther King, without falling apart.

We survived 9/11. We’ve survived devastating earthquakes and hurricanes and a flu pandemic that killed more than half a million Americans in 1918-1919 (and possibly as many as 100 million worldwide, far more than the number who died in World War I). As awful as all these things were, our country is still here.

It’s clear that Brown’s doomsday scenario isn’t based on a sober look at history. It’s a histrionic reaction to the protests that have dogged Trump at most of his recent rallies:

[V]iolent mobs descended on Trump’s rally in Chicago. Psuedo-journalist Michelle Fields accused Trump’s campaign manager Corey Lewandowski of assault in a bid to stir up white knight antipathy against The Donald and even violence. Protestors in Arizona blocked highways and then complained about being “run over.” The list goes on.

Where to even start with that? It takes a certain amount of chutzpah to pretend that the violence at Trump rallies has been caused by “very angry leftist zombies hellbent on destruction” rather than by the Trump supporters who have been caught on film punching and pushing and otherwise manhandling peaceful protesters.

It takes something more than chutzpah to pretend that Lewandowski’s assault on Fields — also caught on camera — was somehow an assault on Trump and his fans.

Oh, and the fact that a small number of protesters blocked a highway for several hours does not portend THE LITERAL APOCALYPSE.

At various points in his post, Brown writes about the possible assassination of Trump as if it has already happened. In this remarkable and revealing sentence, Brown starts off by referring to an entirely hypothetical assassination, only to switch to past tense at the end, as if the murder had already happened:

If [an assassination] happens, leftwing luminaries and the media will be shown to have no control over their supporters, despite them stoking the very same hatred that ended up killing him.

There’s a reason for this, of course. Brown is so eager to affix blame for the (hypothetical) assassination that he has to pretend it’s a done deal — and that it was leftists (plural) who done it. (Never mind that it’s Trump’s enemies on the right who are far more likely to spend their Saturdays at the gun range.)

Brown, happily playing the victim on behalf of his audience of Red Pill Trumpists, seems to think that veritable pogroms will be unleashed against Trump supporters in the wake of the hypothetical assassination. And so he encourages his readers to stock up on guns for their “self-defense.”

Protecting yourself and your family will be paramount if Trump is assassinated, especially if you have not associated yourself with any leftwing cause … It is up to you to help secure yourself and those you love, including with legal firearms. …

[W]ith an assassination, things will get very bad very quickly. Violence against Trump’s person will beget more criminal acts against his supporters and those aligned even moderately with him (i.e. the Republican Party).

Like a lot of doomsday preppers, Brown seems a little too enthusiastic about the prospect of shooting enemies in alleged self-defense. Indeed, at one point he seems to suggest that Trump supporters should bring guns to future Trump rallies even if the billionaire is still alive and kicking.

In Chicago, leftwing hate groups insisted that free speech and freedom of assembly are rights reserved only for people like themselves. We had fists in this case, but expect far more lethal means going forward.

Great. In fact, other Trump fans have already started talking about forming Trump-friendly militias; RoK contributor and Roosh pal Matt Forney even suggested that Trumpists take guns with them to polling places.

Brown also seems to think that the evil leftists want a crisis as much as he does. Sorry, as much as he doesn’t, wink wink nudge nudge. Why? Because debt.

US government debt is currently at 20 trillion, significantly higher than annual GDP. Liberals and others, although most do not know it, need the crisis of something like an assassination on a controversial conservative figure to absolve themselves of the financial mess they have helped create.

If anyone can make sense of the, er, logic here, let me know.

In addition to buying guns and survivalist supplies Brown also encourages gun-toting, apocalypse-expecting Red Pill Trump fans to join up with “[o]rganizations such as (conservative) churches, gun clubs, informal Tea Party groups, [and] neighborhood watch programs,” because, clearly, what neighborhood watch groups need more than anything is a sudden influx of paranoid dickwads with brand new guns aching for an excuse to shoot “SJWs” and possibly black people generally.

Oh, and Brown also suggests joining veteran’s groups, but I can’t imagine many Return of Kings readers are veterans of any wars other than the ones that take place on Twitter.

In the comments to the post, RoK readers talk about how cool Donald Trump is and happily fantasize about the coming apocalypse.

League of Shadows celebrates what he seems to think will be the inevitable victory of the white man:

BLM and MS 13 discount the white man’s ability to wage war.

We are accomplished in this skill set beyond the capabilities of some feral street gangs.

YosarriansRight expects to see something straight out of a TV show:

It becomes a “The Walking Dead” survival scenario. Those that stick to “tea & crumpets” are dead. Those that improvise, adapt and overcome, survive.

Social Darwinism in action.

Bob Smith urges his comrades not to think small:

If sh*t hits the fan REALLY hard, we should prepare to become warlords so we don’t just survive, but so we can kick the SJWs’ asses and take our country back.

A few commenters are a bit less impressed. Someone called Kay dismisses the doomsday talk as “arrant nonsense.” He asks:

If Trump dies, so what?

Lincoln died and a nation wept, Luther King died and a nation wept, Demosthenes died and his people rightly wept, Timoleon, probably the greatest of them all died, and to this day, I read of him ,and bow in humble respect. …

I won’t be surprised if Trump himself arranged for this rubbish to further inflame his uneducated redneck simpleton crack crowd.

Hardcore Realist, meanwhile, declares the post

a sick joke. ROK’s articles have been on the decline since they start recycling old articles just to satisfy the readers. But this nonsense article is pure insanity. Nobody is conspiring to kill Moron Don since he prattles on about some YUGGGGEEEE wall that he’s gonna build on the border. …

Goes to show your abject stupidity in blindly following the Moron Don. As a white man to another white man, I tell you that Trump has skillfully played with your emotions.You are blinded by his vacuous speeches . Is it any wonder why uneducated jackasses form the majority of Trump-Tards?

Someone calling himself Danger responds:

so how long have you hated white men and western civilization?

Putting more guns in the hands of angry, paranoid bigots rarely ends well.



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6 years ago

Trump fan boys have taken to threatening unpledged delegates who say they’ll be supporting other candidates.

I think these dimwits will find out soon enough that they can get away with harassing marginalized people online, but going after people in the establishment will not be taken quite so lightly.

6 years ago

Alan’s not wrong in his examples of English royal-power-grab killings, but I feel like I should note we’ve also had loooong periods of relative internal peace, too. I mean, if we count Anne as the last monarch with more than nominal power (as the last monarch to veto a bill passed by Parliament) then the entire Georgian period is pretty quiet, as is the period between the Anarchy of Stephen and Matilda (finishing 1154) and the Wars of the Roses (beginning 1455). Those are some long-ass times, to use the technical term.

Alan Robertshaw
6 years ago

@ jennywren

Those are some long-ass times


‘Never trust a history professor who uses the phrase “olden days'”

Speaking of Matilda, saw a documentary the other night and learned that what caused her a lot of bother, even amongst her (male) supporters, was that she insisted on the title ‘King’ rather than Queen.

6 years ago

Imaginary Petal:

Theory about Palme: it was the dude who killed Batman’s parents.

My god, you’re right. It’s literally the exact same crime.

So… yeah. Consider!

He was murdered in 1986.

Blockbusting “Batman” comes out in 1989!

RED STRINGS PEOPLE, RED STRINGS! (It was way before good Photoshop or even MS Paint, although Amiga did have DeluxePaint by then… so we’ll go with analog equivalent.)

6 years ago

Stock up on those gunz, alt-righters. And remember, the only way to verify the gun is clean is to pull the trigger while looking down the barrel to check the firing pin.

Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Jackie; currently using they/their, he/his pronouns)
Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Jackie; currently using they/their, he/his pronouns)
6 years ago


Dude, Matt, not cool.

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