Categories
alpha males antifeminism gender policing men who should not ever be with women ever misogyny patriarchy penises PUA reactionary bullshit red pill return of kings rhymes with roosh vaginas

Roosh V, Ever the Romantic, Seeks Human Female “Suitable for Reproduction”

Brace yourself, world! Roosh is planning to reproduce!
Brace yourself, world! Roosh is planning to reproduce!

The We Hunted the Mammoth Pledge Drive is on! If you haven’t already, support this blog by donating through the PayPal button below. Thanks!

Great news, ladies! Pickup artist and rape legalization proponent Roosh Valizadeh has decided to take a wife, or at least a wife-equivalent! Might you qualify for the job?

In a blog post that is essentially the world’s longest and least enticing personal ad, Roosh lays out what he’s looking for in what he so poetically calls “a woman who I think would be suitable for reproduction (and not necessarily state-sanctioned marriage).”

Beldar Conehead could not have put it better!

Let’s go through the list of requirements.

You must be so young and inexperienced you don’t realize you could do better than Roosh

Roosh likes them young, specifying that his future wife or wife equivalent needs to be between the ages of 18 and 25. In part, he explains, this is because he wants someone with a fresh womb, etc, capable of popping out multiple children units.

But he also wants a woman who’s not “emotionally damaged,” which his way of saying “someone who’s never dated anyone better than him.”

[S]ingle women over 25 are emotionally damaged in some way, are alpha widowed, or are professional daters who are incapable of making the proper relationship sacrifice.

“Alpha widows,” in the Red Pill world, are women who look back fondly on men they’ve dated before.

You must not have had sex with anyone better than Roosh V

Ideally, Roosh would prefer a woman who’s never had sex with anyone at all, and who cannot, therefore, compare him to anyone else.

I … don’t want to marry a woman who has voluntarily accepted being used as a [censored by DF] dumpster by other men, or who kisses my child with lips that have been previously wrapped around many other …

We’ll just end that quote a little early, for decency’s sake.

He is, however, willing to wife up — or wife-equivalent up — women who’ve touched fewer than three other penises. As long as the dudes she previously dated were basically big losers.

For a woman who has had sexual partners before me, I must be the absolute best man she has ever been with in terms of appearance, personality, and resources. Otherwise, once the honeymoon is over and the relationship hits an inevitable low point, she will get a “Could I have done better?” itch and sabotage the relationship or test me to the point where I have to play “dread game” just to keep her in the kitchen.

In case you missed his main point, he spells it out as explicitly as he can:

There must be no doubt within her mind that I am the best that she could possibly get.

You should be pretty, but not so pretty that you think you can do better than Roosh

More specifically, you must be a 7 on the ten-point lady attractiveness scale. No other ratings are acceptable.

Thanks to technology and modern cosmopolitan society, a woman who is an 8 or above in beauty has been exposed to more toxic situations and experiences where she’s achieved some level of e-fame, been validated incessantly for her appearance, and been offered money, consumer products, and trips for her vagina (and likely accepted those offers).

I think he means that these terrible 8-point-or-higher women have traded sex for vacations, not that lovesick beta males have literally paid for these women’s vaginas to travel the world. But this is Roosh here, so who knows.

She has also fully utilitized her beauty to get her way in life, including prime seating for manipulating men for personal gain. Not only is such a woman harder to manage, but her entitlement is far higher. For a life partner I will purposefully aim lower than what I could get for casual sex.

So evidently it is fine for Roosh to think he could “do better” than his wife, but not vice versa.

The color of your skin must fit within acceptable parameters

Roosh, of Persian/Armenian descent, wants his future wife/wife equivalent to have a “skin tone … within two shades of myself.” So no Swedes, but also no one with skin much darker than his.

I would like to have kids that look like me, so I will not reproduce with a woman who is black, Asian, or Indian. Acceptable races are South American, Persian, Armenian, and European (non-Northern).

You should be feminine, submissive, and preferably not too smart or strong

Roosh likes his women like he likes his coffee, weak. (NOTE: I do not actually know how Roosh likes his coffee.) As he sees it, his ideal mate

should look and act like a woman and not try to compete with me in terms of mental or physical strength.

You should be happy staying at home with the kids while he procures some sort of super-enriched bread

Once the kids arrive, she should have no desire to pursue a pointless office career in place of taking care of our growing brood. …  her place will be in the home while I tirelessly work on my internet ebook hustle to bring home the bread that gives her everything she needs.

But Roosh won’t be a tyrant. While he specifies that he won’t “participate in more than 5% of household duties outside of home improvement,” his bride or bride equivalent will be allowed to have some hobbies, and possibly even a dog.

She may have some freedom to pursue hobbies like yoga or knitting … She can live a pleasant middle-class lifestyle that can even include dog and car ownership.

Sounds like paradise! Speaking of which:

You have to believe in some sort of god

Roosh, who doesn’t seem to have any religious beliefs of his own, as far as I can discern, requires that his future wife or wife equivalent be a believer herself. As he sees it, religious women are less likely to use the internet or get fat on him.

My experience shows that a woman who doesn’t believe in god has a value system taught to her by corporations and progressive degenerates. She will certainly be addicted to internet attention, alcohol, casual sex, material possessions, or food.

But don’t worry, gals. Roosh doesn’t specify WHICH god he requires you to believe in, so all you Baal worshipers should be ok!

You probably should live in some tiny Ukrainian village without internet access

As Roosh sees it, his requirements for the future mother of his children

are quite reasonable, and something that would have taken no more than a 6-month search two generations ago … .

Unfortunately, such women are hard to find these days, at least in places with actual sidewalks and electricity and so forth.

[B]ased on my last decade of intensive fornication, I’ve encountered maybe two girls who fit the bill, especially when it comes to girls being a virgin and eager to stay at home. Part of this reason is that most of my time hunting for women was spent in big cities where such values are rapidly disappearing.

So where in the world does Roosh think he might find the elusive girl of his dreams, reproduction-wise?

If I do want to have kids, I should immediately move, because I’m surely not getting any younger. The two countries that seem to best accomplish my list are Ukraine and Russia … .

Wait: IF you want kids?

Yep, if.

Because there’s one little catch, ladies. Roosh doesn’t actually want kids now. He’s just pretty sure he’ll be wanting some later.

While I can honestly state that I’m not crazy about having kids right now, I know that my desires can change and so I have to guess if I will want them within five years time.

So all you ladies older than 20 are pretty much out of luck — by the time Roosh gets around to actually wanting kids, you’ll be too old, an ancient crone of 25 years or older.

But if you’re between the ages of 13 and 20, with the proper color skin and no career aspirations, you still have a chance! All you need to do is to is to throw away your iPhone, strap on a chastity belt, move to some small town in Ukraine or Russia, and wait five years for Roosh to arrive.

246 replies on “Roosh V, Ever the Romantic, Seeks Human Female “Suitable for Reproduction””

Seriously, Roosh and his ilk are children. They want something between their mother and a fleshlight. But not only that, I’m sure some mothers will actually push their children to try an better themselves and would challenge them. These manchildren want someone who will never challenge them, will never make them question themselves. But they must also be good looking, because Roosh and co. are so awesome that they should have a hot wife-sort-of-person.
I’m amazed how you can hold the belief that you are perfect and great, but at the same time demand no one who could possibly find someone better than them.

@Orion:
An “atheist bro” is that guy who sits around quoting Hitchslaps, but who only seems to care about child abuse when it’s priests that are doing it and who’s more into pissing off religious people than into trying to build a better world. Anyone who hangs around atheist spaces for any length of time knows that guy.

Famous Atheist Bros are hard to come by because people tend to get famous for doing things, not just for reblogging memes. Justin Vacula is perhaps the gold standard, but he’s been keeping his head down recently.

Dread is really good. I’ve played a Game of Thrones conversion of it and it worked really well. We were Night’s Watch members north of the wall, creeping through the forest. The mechanics really support the unbearable buildup of tension.

@ej:
It’ll be interesting to see how Valizadeh reacts to a man criticising him rather than a woman; if he commands his minions to attack Yates like he did Jennifer Beergirl; and if he tries to distance himself from his own words being held up for public scrutiny. Time will tell.

I’ll definitely give it a watch.

Given the tendency of the manosphere to see anything that is less than an uncritical puff piece as an attack and a feminist conspiracy, I think we know how they’ll react.

OK I’ve watched the episode. Two favorite moments:

1. When Reggie couldn’t get an interview with anyone from MGTOW, then he went online to see what they were saying about him. What were they saying? Racist shit, of course. Incredibly angry and racist comments directed at the BBC in general, and at Reggie in particular. Reggie is confused. What are they so angry about, he wonders. We didn’t even say anything about them yet! And where’s the racism coming from all of a sudden? Then he had this realization: If this is the stuff they’re saying about me for doing nothing other than requesting an interview, what in the world must they be saying about feminists who actually criticize them?

2. When talking to Milo, Reggie mentions the horrible rape threats received by a specific feminist woman. This makes Milo giggle. Reggie again reacts with confusion. Why are you laughing, he asks. This is serious. Milo mumbles something about freeze peaches.

And Roosh didn’t make himself look very good either. These guys can’t even behave like normal people when they know they’re being filmed for TV. This was not good publicity for the manosphere.

@ dhag85

Those were certainly some of the best parts (and the most revealing to the general public.)

I think Reggie was the best presenter they could have had doing this investigation- he managed to both engage with them on a personal level, but also not to let that get in the way of portraying a balanced view.

It was as unbiased as it could be, but yes, I think we all know the reaction it will get.

@ WeirwoodTreeHugger

They were ‘right’ because Reggie interviewed the manosphere’s opposition as well? My goodness. They really won’t be satisfied unless they get a biased puff piece.

They want everything to be about them, don’t they? They go on about ‘freeze peach,’ but then demand that their opponents shouldn’t get a chance to speak! Pathetic.

I despise it when people mistake a ‘neutral’ tone for a ‘biased against them’ tone, just because the source didn’t agree with them. People like that are paranoid.

Unfortunately, the MRM likely know exactly what they’re doing, they’re just even more paranoid.

@WWTH & nparker
He interviewed one feminist who had received rape/death/bomb threats. He spent more time with the man who had actually served time for online harassment than he did with the feminist. He spent very little time with their opponents, but it’s still too much for them. They really don’t seem to be able to see the negative image they are portraying. The media doesn’t need to help them with that. The MGTOWs refusing to do an interview and then attacking Reggie before he had even said/done anything says a lot more about them than any interview could.

One of the things that I noticed was the number of men who said contradictory things in back-to-back sentences. They showed a clip of a comedian making a joke about secretly giving a woman the morning after pill, but his next sentence was “Respect women.” What message are people going take from that? Are they going to remember the joke or the two words after the joke? The joke, of course. They are going to remember that it’s funny to give a woman a drug without her knowledge or consent.

Then there was Roosh with his “No means no until it means yes” bullshit. His next sentence was something about how consent is important, followed by something about waiting until she’s ready to do the next thing (aka: boundary pushing). What’s the take-home message there? Sure, he mentioned consent, but it was glossed over pretty quickly. What he was really saying was that if you keep pushing a woman’s boundaries, you’ll get to have sex.

And that is terrifying.

@ ej

Exactly.

In fact, if there was anything I didn’t like about the programme it was that there should have been more people opposed to the manosphere in it, because there was only one.

Another fav moment:

During Roosh’s talk, he turned to Reggie and started asking about his experience with women (“girls”). Roosh asked about Reggie’s sexual experience, and when he didn’t get very interesting answers he tried with “are you gay?” and obviously he got a laugh from the idiot audience. Then they quieted down when Reggie informed them he’s been on TV since he was 8 years old and this sort of thing isn’t “new” to him anymore, subtly hinting that he’s had his share of casual sex and moved on. It was interesting to see how Roosh’s fans immediately accepted Reggie as the new alpha of the room, or at least that’s how I interpreted that exchange. With the added ingredient that Reggie is a black man, i.e. a Roosh fan’s worst fear (other than women). I think they were terrified.

So I just watched the documentary.

My initial thoughts:
– It’s very well-executed.
– Allowing the speakers to condemn themselves with their own words seems to have worked very well.
– Yates puts himself into the documentary a great deal. Is this the norm nowadays?
– I felt very uncomfortable with the way he spoke about “Josh”, the 18-year-old Youtube speaker; he paid almost no attention to “Josh’s” arguments and concentrated on his youth. I’m not comfortable with the ageism inherent in that.

@ EJ (The Other One)

I agree, very well executed, and the speakers did a really great job at that, didn’t they? Milo’s giggles, Roosh’s everything, so yes.

To me, I didn’t see Reggie speaking about ‘Josh’ as ageism. I think he was just pointing out, a bit like we sometimes do here, that the manosphere has a bad influence on young people, because young people often have very little experience of the real world and are therefore often impressionable and immature. (Then again, maybe I haven’t experienced ageism enough to comment- I have experienced it, but perhaps not enough.)

However, young age or no, ‘Josh’ was an incredibly ridiculous guy. I loved it when Reggie pushed for reasons for Josh to think what he thinks, only to be told it is because Josh has ‘thought about it more deeply,’ or whatever, rather than seeing any actual evidence.

@dhag85, I just loved the fact that none of them wanted to be seen where they were, bar a massive… 2 people, who then proceeded to come out with nonsense and a hint of ‘freeze peach.’

Also, even that Dapper Lap-dog-for-sexists whatsisname (who I don’t think is manosphere really) came out with the standard ‘satire! Hur hur!’ crap.

The type of woman he describes wouldn’t touch him with a ten-foot pole, seriously. He’s an admitted promiscuous manipulator. He cannot be trusted. I devoutly hope that he dies alone, riddled with disease and regret.

Charli XCX has been talking on Twitter about the time her Feminism documentary is on compared to Reggie’s documentary. I agree hers should have been on at a better time, but she quite clearly should have watched Reggie’s documentary before making tweets like:

“a lot of my audience were unable to watch. this doc seems (from this snippet) to be discussing feminism in an entirely negative light and is”

and

“the way the man in this snippet talks about ‘women and gays’ is just so fucking FRUSTRATING. people like this don’t deserve airtime.”

Which are both incredibly wrong. Reggie’s was in no way doing any such thing, and people like the MRM do deserve airtime- because it shows everyone how vile they are.

Her jumping to conclusions doesn’t exactly help her come across as helpful to anyone, I don’t think personally.

EJ,

Yeah Dread seems like it has a lot of possible applications.

I’ve been thinking for a while that it would make a good Jane Austen rpg. Each player creates an unmarried young upper class woman, and whoever knocks the tower down has to get married.

About 7 minutes in, a guy at Roosh’s talk asks him for tips on raising his daughter. Oh dear.

15:51, that kid just looks up at soapbox dude like “What’s wrong with you?” and then back to his ice cream.

Last time a kid gave me that look was when I was trying to convince them broccoli was delicious.

I was babysitting.

Kid did not believe me.

EDIT: Also, thanks WWTH for posting the vid!

@Contrapangloss,

I agree that broccoli is delicious, so I was fascinated to learn that hating broccoli flavor is actually mostly genetic. So, just saying I sympathize with the kid. It may taste really awful to them, and we just don’t have the “right” genes to realize how bad it is. 😉

I’ve also heard that little kids legit taste things differently, supposedly more bitter, with the guess being that evolutionary it kept them from eating the plethora of poisonous things around them.

I’ve heard the same thing as Argenti. It’s why kids tend to find tannin-heavy red wines yucky, for example, and why adults find children’s food so sweet and flavourless.

So I’m watching the BBC documentary and loving it. Mostly finished with it and kinda sad it looks like we won’t be diving into AVfM, but hey, reading Bang Iceland and going “that’s illegal there too” was worth it. As for the cleanliness of Roosh’s place, it’s cuz he’s just not got anything to clutter it with — it’s clearly a beer, bread and mayo sort of place. I’m honestly surprised he’s got a real night stand and not milk crates or cider blocks, the place looks so much like a college student’s first apartment (pre-drunk pizza party).

Also, all my commercials were for Legos. I think YouTube Knows Things!

IT INCLUDES THE DRINK ATTACK!!!

I’m one of those people who must have the broccoli hating gene. I just cannot stand the taste or smell. Even looking at it grosses me out a little bit.

On the other hand, I adore cilantro and am not one of those unlucky souls who have the gene that make it taste soapy.

Genetics is weird and silly.

I liked seeing Yates sort of have to confront his privilege as he did not realize there were still people who dislike feminism out there. Something women who ever express a feminist opinion obviously know.

I think also that watching him read all those racist comments will help with the brogressive types who are able to recognize racism but are just fine with misogyny. You know, the type of guy who thinks of himself as a progressive but might have agreed with some of the manosphere points. Those guys will probably turned off by the racism.

WWTH — yeah, I definitely liked both his shock that there are people out there who hate feminism, and his “I just stuck my pinkie toe in, what’s it like for the feminists who wade in?”; and what he said to Roosh about his little brother… actually, everything about how he doesn’t want his kid brother exposed to their shit.

It’s a good 101 for the non-mammothers not wading in acronym soup that doesn’t fall over backwards trying to appear unbiased, while not going into it expecting it to be a manure pile.

Yates puts himself into the documentary a great deal. Is this the norm nowadays?

It seems to be. Or to put it another way, it didn’t strike this 26-year old viewer as at all unusual.

I just watched a really cool documentary a couple weeks ago called “Do I Sound Gay?” where a 40 year old filmmaker used his insecurities about his voice as an opportunity to talk to linguists, sociologists, activists, celebrities, and coaches about orientation and speech.

@Argenti Aertheri

All your commercials were LEGO? I only got one after that LIonel Hutz video. What am I doing wrong to not get four?

I’d never seen the drink ‘attack’ before I watched the doc. Glad I did!

OH, oh- LEGO animation of the ‘Battle of Montreal!’ just popped into my head as an idea I NEED TO BE MADE!

Hmm… I must have the gene that makes cilantro taste soapy, I can definitely taste that – but it’s not the dominant flavour, and I still absolutely love it.

I still have profound memories of the way broccoli (and other veggies like it) tasted when I was a kid. But it doesn’t taste that way to me now. Then I can only compare it to eating powdered sulfur. I love all those vegetables now. There’s only one veggie that I still can’t eat and that’s the bitter melon. Maybe it’s a culturally acquired taste or it might just be me.

Excited to watch the Reggie Yates doc later today on iPlayer maybe.

What a creep. Science needs to find a way to explain something that is longer than “never,” because that’s how soon I’d ever go anywhere near someone like that. If he was the last thing on the face of the planet, I’d sooner hunt down an alternate parallel universe where my fave fictional character who isn’t even human (but still rather human-like and more human than this creep will ever be) is real, escape to his universe and cozy up with him instead. This creep can then die alone as the last remaining human (is he even?) in this entire universe.

nparker — you use iplayer? I’m on the other side of the pond and watched it on YouTube.

Isn’t there some correlation between the ‘ability’ to taste the bitterness in stuff like broccoli and cabbage and being able to roll your tongue into a tube? Sure I read that somewhere.

When I was a kid I absolutely hated broccoli (and now I love it). But I don’t recall thinking it tasted bitter. I used to drink grapefruit juice when I was little, so I know I’ve always loved bitter stuff.

Isn’t there some correlation between the ‘ability’ to taste the bitterness in stuff like broccoli and cabbage and being able to roll your tongue into a tube? Sure I read that somewhere.

Cabbage is bitter?

@ pandapool

Cabbage is bitter?

To some people; again it’s a genetic thing. Supposedly to do with your ancestors and their ability to detect alkaloid poisons so they know what plants to eat (although why that affects some people and not others is something I’d like to know if anyone here can shed light)

Mind if I do another quick survey?

Please answer yes or no to the following:

1. I find broccoli/cabbage tastes bitter.
2. I can roll my tongue into a tube.

For anyone who has real trouble with the smell or taste of broccoli, cabbage and other brassicas, I read a tip from Stephanie Alexander — well-known Australian chef. https://www.penguin.com.au/products/9781920989002/cook-s-companion (And no, I didn’t buy it for myself. Waaaaay beyond my pay grade.)

Don’t microwave them. Fill a very large saucepan, or stockpot, with water and get it boiling reasonably hard before putting the veg in. Her view is that you need to have a large enough quantity of water that all the sulphur compounds will dissolve into that and none, or near enough, will be retained in the veg itself.

As for the coriander gene, I and my sister have it in spades. Can’t tolerate … caraway, tarragon, fennel, coriander, dill, fenugreek, cumin and probably half a dozen others depending on how my day is. Funnily enough, I don’t normally taste it as soapy. With tarragon and coriander, I think the meat is ‘off’. Even when I complain about it, I don’t first think of my dislike for these herbs as the basis of my complaint. Gives rise to many ‘humorous’ quips from my daughters. You hate coriander. How come you can’t taste it?!!?

Though I don’t mind the seeds in most pickling mixtures. Turns out they’re different compounds. http://www.compoundchem.com/2014/03/13/chemical-compounds-in-herbs-spices/

Pandapool, all brassicas contain compounds which taste bitter if there’s enough of them.

Kale, cabbage, cauliflower, turnips, broccoli, Brussels sprouts can taste horrible if not cooked in a way that gets rid of (enough of) those compounds.

@Alan

Broccoli is taste like grass and I’ve never had raw cabbage but I’m pretty sure whenever I ate it, it tasted vinegary, whether boiled, in cabbage rolls or in kimchi. I can roll my tongue into a tube. I also like the taste of cilantro/coriander.

@mildymagnificent

Well cauliflower is an awful, tasteless abomination and kale does taste bitter to me. Brussel sprouts are AMAZING, though.

@Alan:

I love broccoli, cauliflower, cabbage, Brussels sprouts etc. Raw, roasted with a bit of butter and lemon (the BEST way to eat it), steamed, you name it. Love the stuff. I can taste bitterness, but I like it. I don’t think ‘bitterness’ to me is the same as the bitterness my husband tastes – he hates it.

I can roll my tongue into a tube.

@ Argenti Aertheri

Yes, I used BBC Iplayer to watch.
What Youtube channel has it? Was it an official BBC one?

1. No
2. Yes

Should have said this yesterday, but I’m a longtime reader, first-time poster. Hi.

Pro-tip:

Add chopped onions, garlic, and spring onions to Broccoli to imbue flavor. Stir-fry with some butter and salt to taste. Yes, you must use conventional onions and spring onions. They both have different flavors.

Why, yes, I am a man that can cook fairly well. I am truly a cultured and intelligent gentleman….heh, heh, heh, not really, everyone should know how to cook.

“You should be feminine, submissive, and preferably not too smart or strong”

Might we suggest a member of the Christian Taliban?

“How The Duggars’ Church Encourages Young Women To ‘Submit’”
http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2015/05/22/how-the-duggars-church-encourages-young-women-to-submit.html

Or a member of the Taliban Taliban, since skin color is an issue for Rush V:
http://www.pbs.org/wnet/wideangle/episodes/a-woman-among-warlords/womens-rights-in-the-taliban-and-post-taliban-eras/?p=66

What is hilarious is Roosh V believes that he is a stoic, fierce caveman. However, he comes across as afraid. “What! I am not scared!” When a man refuses to allow a female journalist to interview him without blowing him first, he is broadcasting his fear of being challenged by a woman. When a man despises older women and women with educations, he announces that he needs a woman to be submissive or he falls apart. Roosh is the neediest, most terrified man that has ever worn a baseball cap.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.