Modified image from the documentary “Seeking Asian Female”
Paul Elam may have sort of abandoned his Men’s Rights lady hatin’ website A Voice for Men — he announced his retirement from the Men’s Rights movement back in March — but his longtime fans will certainly be relieved to hear that he has not given up the lady hatin’ that made him the internet-famous man he is today.
But now he’s working some racism into the mix.
On his An Ear for Men YouTube channel, Elam seems to be setting himself up as a sort of Mr. Lonelyhearts for lady’ hatin men, providing tips on how to “screen out loser women,” how to deal with “problem women — we used to call them ‘bitches,'” and how to get rage-spittle out of your beard.
Ok, I made that last one up.
In his latest video, Elam has decided to take on yet another kind of problem women — SPOILER ALERT: Asian women — warning Western men of the dangers of “shopping in Asia or some other country [sic]” for the supposedly more subservient “women we used to call Oriental till the PC police decided that, too, was an insult.”
Elam warns his viewers that any Oriental Asian woman “willing to leave her homeland to marry a guy she met on the internet” might just possibly have motives other than love.
To illustrate this point, Elam pastes in that famous clip from Full Metal Jacket in which a Vietnamese sex worker promises two American servicemen that she will “love you long time.”
Which brings us to this POP QUIZ
But the dangers of Asian women aren’t confined to those conniving young women just off the boat from Asialand. For there are Asians who live in the United States as well, and if you go for one of those you might end up with … brace yourself … MARGARET CHO.
Or you might get your dick lopped off.
No, seriously. Elam literally warns men considering “going Asian” that they might end up with someone like “feminist idiot and unfunny comedian Margaret Cho,” or “Twitter fembot Suey Park,” or even Catherine Kieu Becker, a California woman, originally from Vietnam, now serving life in prison for cutting off her estranged husband’s penis.
Apparently Elam thinks the best way to keep American men from fetishizing Asian women is to convince them that the Asian (or Asian-American) gal of their dreams might literally lop off their dick or — possibly even worse — tell them a feminist joke.
But I can’t completely hate Elam’s video. I mean, sure, it’s a racist, misogynistic mess, and Elam’s gleeful grin makes my skin crawl. But if it convinces even one of his fans to leave Asian women alone, it may actually do the world a teensy tiny little bit of good.
![Raw Story on The Top 5 Rape-Apologist Reactions to the Steubenville Verdicts [UPDATED]](https://i0.wp.com/www.wehuntedthemammoth.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/rape_culture.png?resize=50%2C50)
Zimmerman will definitely be the Republican nominee for President in 2020. It’s the only way to go from here.
@PI
Personally I’d rather have this person in prison for life instead walking free, as an example to all bigots thay no you cannot literally get away with murder in states with SYG. Seriously hoping no auction site will approve his auction.
Speaking of disgustingly slimy moves:
http://www.bbc.com/news/election-us-2016-36272236
Would anyone believe this? Anyone? I’m happy to see that the article is quite ready to point out inconsistencies and switching sides all the time. Not to mention he won’t release his tax returns either, most likely it’ll show him being not as rich as he’d like people to believe.
I can never tell people apart unless I’m very very familiar with their looks, and even then I often fail. That’s one of the reasons why I don’t normally watch movies. Even after 5 (6?) seasons of GoT I still constantly have to ask my Otter who all these characters are.
I once failed to recognize someone who had been my classmate for 4 years. Awkward times.
I’m pretty good with faces. But if I’m not familiar with a female celebrity, I might get her confused with other female celebrities on a magazine cover if she appears to be younger than 40 and has white skin; a slender build; long, straight blonde hair; a small, straight nose; and blindingly white teeth.
Plastic surgeons and dentists are making out like bandits.
When my first husband and I visited Hawaii, he (Chinese-Panamanian) was frequently taken for a local by locals. Until he started talking, then it was clear that he wasn’t.
My current, and hopefully last, husband has noticed that I don’t really pay attention to what white men look like. He finds it mildly amusing, and jokes that he can flirt with guys without me noticing but he always knows who in the room I’ve noticed.
Also, for the record, most of the white gay men I’ve met who are primarily attracted to Asian men have unrecognized and unresolved racial issues. Actually, many interracialist white gay men do – to the extent of being attracted exclusively to one race/ethnicity. The idea of finding Asian, Black and Latino men all prospectively attractive strains their imagination.
Elam forgot to warn his fellow MRAs about Asian women who write fiction that will blow your mind.
I’m surprised he didn’t bring up another famous castrator, Lorena Bobbit. Better avoid those hispanic women also, MRAs. Especially hispanic women like me.
@Grace of Spades
Oh another on my list of want to reads. As a Chinese Vietnamese american there is nothing better than to hear that Elam is getting more MRA’s away from asian women.
Honestly, I’m surprised Paulie has just now glommed onto the story of the woman who de-penised her cheating husband — isn’t it a few years old? Or has he just been stewing about it all this time, and suddenly NOW had a lightbulb moment in which to somehow connect it to the mail-order bride industry, which the MRAsshats so lurrrrrrve?
And yeah, Lorna Bobbit. Beware the women of Ecuador…they don’t react well when spousally abused, either.
Is it possible to be attracted exclusively to one ethnicity/race without fetishizing members of that group? In theory, maybe , but people who innocently claim this seem to have at the very least imbibed certain appealing stereotypes into their subconscious . That, combined with the East Asian cultural tendency towards politeness, results in Asian women often being viewed as more available etc.
BTW the image from “Seeking Asian Female”… yuck.
Chiming in as part of the potentially face-blind club! I have the amnestic variety; I have no problem distinguishing between faces that I’m seeing, but my memory of facial encoding is quite bad, I use a lot of non-facial cues to recognize new people. (It’s a bit of a running joke that it’s possible to hide from me by wearing a hat).
Though from from what I’ve heard/read, my experiences are pretty mild compared to others with similar problems. Like for instance, even with characters in a TV show with similar non-facial cues, it will only take me 2-3 episodes before I can recognize them fairly easily.
Probably the most prominent example I have is actually kind of the reverse; in the show Once Upon a Time, it depicts some of the same characters in two different time periods. And even with full knowledge of it, it took me a very long time (and confirmation from my partner) to realize that this and this are the same character played by the same actor. It’s still difficult for me to “see” them as the same person.
Paul Elam deserves a path eternally strewn with lego and d4s without foot protection. Also, Margaret Cho is an incredible comedian who should be getting a lot more work than she does. Her timing is impeccable, her style is awesome, and she’ll actively try to make inroads for other Asian Americans.
Did any of you ever watch “All-American Girl?” That show was so funny! And it dealt with Asian stereotypes, especially Korean-American ones, from an insiders perspective and it was so good! I watched it with my parents because I was a minor when it was on and they love Margaret Cho too.
Could Elam also be sure to warn MRA’s to stay away from those scary, evil middle-aged white women?
Um, asking for a friend.
>have you seen the comments for Laci Green’s last video on “false rape allegations”?
Oy. I imagine it looks a bit like this, only a lot angrier.
That creepy pic from Seeking Asian Female really only captures a little bit of the creepiness of that documentary, which follows those two from her arrival in the US from China (depicted in that pic) through a not-very-happy marriage. He’s not what she expected, and she is definitely not what he expected. And the filmmaker — herself fourth-generation Chinese-American — sort of gets in the middle of it all, sometimes translating for the two of them.
It’s not on Netflix, alas, but you can get it on Amazon video.
Here’s a bit from an interview with the director:
>Many of the challenges I faced in making the film became part of the story of the film itself. Originally I started out making an objective film about men with “Yellow Fever.” Similar to the self-consciousness I have around men who stare at me because they are interested in Asian women, I am very self-conscious about being the center of attention and never wanted to make a personal documentary. But whenever I filmed Steven, it was very clear that because I am an Asian American woman he gave me amazing access and could also never really ignore me as I filmed him. I would tell him, “Don’t talk to me. I’m a fly on a wall.” Instead he would constantly engage. I spent a lot of time in the very uncomfortable position of being keenly focused on the type of man who would make me extremely uncomfortable in my personal life. The more I filmed him, the more I realized that by including my story, I would be able to capture a story that is never shown on camera — how it feels to be objectified as an Asian American woman. The more I filmed him, the more I realized that I was beginning to understand his vulnerabilities and had to rethink why I had originally set out to make an “expose” of his search for an Asian wife. When his fiancée Sandy arrived in the US, I realized that even with my limited Mandarin, I could communicate better with either one of them than they could with each other. I also realized that Sandy was completely isolated and had not a single friend in America outside of Steven. Steven and Sandy began to call on me asking me to come over at every conflict. Although I shot the film with coverage in case I went back to telling an objective story, I eventually became so deeply pulled into their relationship drama that I couldn’t cut myself out. Even though the filmmaker in me was grateful to have their trust and access to such intimate moments in their life, the normal human being in me felt very awkward in the middle of their intense fights (I’m definitely not cut out for reality TV). I was a one-woman crew, learning how to shoot and record sound as I filmed them. Anyone else in the scene would have made shooting very stilted. I grew up learning Mandarin from college professors, not my parents who did not speak Chinese. Filming while translating between English and Chinese was extremely challenging, especially as their relationship drama intensified — and all of us became more and more exhausted. Perhaps the biggest hurdle, as expressed in the film, was realizing that by capturing their story, I had begun to play a role in the success or failure of their relationship, a relationship that I had always questioned. Ultimately, I had to get over my own prejudices before I could tell the story well.
http://www.pbs.org/independentlens/blog/debbie-lum/
@Aerinea: I loved All American Girl – and this is from someone who normally loathes sitcoms!
@Tara: If you can’t scare them off with ethnicity, I think short hair, tattoos, piercings, enjoying the right to vote, etc will also work to frighten MRAs. Combined, or in pairs! Just admitting middle-age might be enough (I’m in that category also). Isn’t every woman written off by them unless she’s 19 max?
Of course, we can always have workshops to perfect our 1000 cock stares.
@Ooglyboogly: Kim is an amazing author; you can’t go wrong with her writing. Also, her website photo would probably make many MRAs blow a gasket. I mean, she’s eating fritos. Any woman who ingests snack foods will immediately develop cellulite and make their boners sad. WIMMINS MUST NOT SNACK!
Drat it all, now I want fritos.
Isn’t George Zimmerman supposed to be behind bars?! Didn’t he finally get locked up after getting caught sneaking weapons into Ferguson?! I just…don’t have anything appropriate for this site’s comment policy to say on that!
I also often have a hard time telling people apart, but I see lots of similarities between faces that other people don’t. There have been times I thought a single coworker was actually two separate people. I also have trouble identifying people I know very well and can easily recognize when they’re out of context. I might know them personally for years and be able to pick them out on on sight in their usual or anticipated place, but if I bump into them in public I will draw a total blank. I have no idea why my brain groups things this way.
*raises a hand* Prosopagnosia sucks, and this is why I sort of like superhero movies/TV series (because costumes make it easier to tell people apart, as opposed to normal clothing) or animated movies/TV series.
Also, *sigh*. Had an another “oh there’s my mother-in-law, oops, no, that was a serious identity blunder once more” episode.
@BritterSweet
He’s one of many reasons why #Blacklivesmatter is required to still be around. He is the GOP sweetheart and therefore untouchable.
I live in a world where people like him can commit vigilantism so long as it’s the right target, I live in a punisher comic without Punisher.
Is it possible to be attracted exclusively to one ethnicity/race without fetishizing members of that group?
Certainly. Imprinting is one possible way this can happen (i. e., if your first crush made a strong enough impression on you that you end up looking for someone who resembles them in some respect).
Developing a 1000 cock stare doesn’t require one to use the method acting technique…just watching a qualified person’s 1000 cock stare and then copying it should be fine.
Time for a field trip to a poultry farm!
@ Bryce
Yes. If that’s your own race/ethnicity. And then it’s kind of racist.
@mockingbird – the only place I’ve ever really been where people immediately and consistently start talking to me in anything but English (other than France where they do that to everyone) is Finland. And I am a 1/4 Finn. My son – only 1/8th looks so Finnish (a dead ringer for my dead grandmother) that he’s been subjected to lectures for being non-responsive to adult queries (I think that’s what was going on). That being said when I lived in Puerto Rico I had people argue with me that I had to be Puerto Rican because I looked Puerto Rican and I had a Puerto Rican name (my name could not be more German, which I’m not really).
Actually, come to think of it, most of Latin America people speak to me in Spanish, but that’s because I always assumed that they think I look like I could speak Spanish. And in Italy people spoke to me in Spanish – bizarrely.
@Grace of Spades – Fritos are my favourite snack and generally not available in the UK. But what are those Frito things she is eating? Is that a Frito twist I imagine all snack-lines exactly as they were when I left the US.
Hello.
> Moocow
Ah, l’éternel “C’était mieux âââvant.”
On the topic, maybe Mr Elam had watched too often the movie “Ai no corrida” and is now convinced that every woman from an Asia country is a wiener chopper, a Sada Abe in disguise.
On the “Oriental” stuff, as the earth is almost round, you are always at the east of yourself. And at the west too. And north, and south. So define someone only by some kind of cardinal direction is quite imprecise (and absurd).
Have a nice day.
I saw Margaret Cho live years ago. She’s hilarious and does a frighteningly accurate Bjork impression.
Well, I guess if this does happen, then “The pen is in her hand”…
Re: indistinguishable white dudes
Count the Mobys (Mobies?)
http://youtu.be/LDHMjO7UbMo
Is it just me or is there a whole bunch of castration anxiety going on over in MRAland?
(I could have sworn there was another term for that a la Freud, and now it’s gonna bug me. All I can think of is penis envy, my number one least favourite theory. Thanks, Siggy, you misogynist asshat)
This may be a relevant topic to place this in:
http://www.theatlantic.com/politics/archive/2016/05/congress-race-oriental-negro/482238/
I’m white, and bi. I’ve dated a few men of different races and I’ve found I can be attracted to just about anyone of any race. It’s not a race fetishism, I just find people with certain body types attractive, regardless of skin color.