Some people think the solution to the whole incel thing is to somehow “redistribute sex” and get these sad boys the girlfriends they pine for s desperately — whether by cajoling or perhaps even compelling women to give these guys a chance, or simply by paying sex workers to take care of their unwanted celibacy.
People who make such proposals tens to be very light in the details, because they can never quite get past the fact that women tend to avoid incels for perfectly good reasons; these guys aren’t just depressed; they’re hateful and angry and hold deep grudges against all the women who’ve ignored them or who might ignore them someday. Even if there were some magical way to throw sex at them as if it were some kind of government cheese it wouldn’t make them happy.
How do I know this? Because they tell us so, again and again. Considier the screed I found on the BlackPill Club forums this afternoon from someone calling himself Che.
“Never forget: the damage is done,” Che begins.
Especially you incels in your mid-20s or above…never forget:
Even if you ascended with a beautiful stacey and fucked her somehow, you’ll never forget the pain that the more ‘Emotional Gender’ has done to you.
You can take the involuntary celibacy out of the involuntarily celibate but doing so won’t erase their resentment at women — and their deep self-hatred.
You’ve been bullied all your life, no friends, no girl to talk to, you where spitted at by society for simply existing as an ugly man, something you have not chose or can ever change, it was like life wasn’t even for you, you where a Mistake!
None of this is anything that sex can fix.
Now you had sex with the woman of your dreams, you think you’d feel good after that, but got surprised that even this can’t help you anymore, it’s like you don’t feel anything, just anger, some fear.. and void..
What you feel is what the incel ideology makes you feel; it has very little to do with the real world, with “ugliness” or anything like that. It’s the poison in your head that makes you feel bad. Depression distorts your thinking; incels have adopted this depressive way of thinking as a way of life.
Normies understimate what the below average man goes through, they think that we only want sex and view women as objects, but in-fact we have far more problems than this, we simply don’t exist in the modern world, we have no voice, Normal people don’t want anything to do with us,
There are plenty of “normies” who are depressed or fucked up in any number of ways; incels haven’t cornered the market for misery — they just think they have.
shit we are getting beaten up or get a fake rape accusation for talking to a woman, while chad can tell a girl ‘sex time’ and have sex with her..
It certainly doesn’t help that their ideas abut how the world works are utterly delusional.
Our case, is a case of existing, so as i have just said, if you really think having sex, or even having a reletionship when you’re above 25 will save you, you’ll need to think again, life’s gonna hit you hard.
It’s true that if you never give up your grudges you’ll be unhappy for life even if “Stacies” throw themselves at you.
Life’s gonna hit you hard, you’ll simply try to keep that girlfriend for the whole of your life, cuz (obviously) you can’t get another one, right?
If you enter into a relationship thinking this, you’re going to end up being insecure and controlling and you’re pretty much guaranteed to either have a miserable relationship or one that doesn’t last.
But she will eventually leave, whatever you do, she’ll leave you for the better dominant male,
Or maybe she’ll leave you for a guy who isn’t nursing ugly resentments from their younger years.
Nature is programmed like this, and believe me, you can’t do anything about
As you know in boxing, the punch that you don’t see is the one that will hurt you the most, same in daily life, i’ve told you this because i don’t want you to get into deep depression after she leaves you, life is gonna hit you hard, but you’ll need to get back up after that punch.
Virtually everyone feels miserable after a breakup of even a very bad relationship. A lot of what incels think is utterly unique about them — their suffering, mainly — isn’t unique at all; it’s just life. Depression can make things worse; therapy and medications (and time) can make things better.
But incels refuse to get the help that would make an actual difference in their lives and instead end up stewing in their own resentments and misery for life, or at least until something knocks the incel ideology out of their heads.
Follow me on Mastodon.
Send tips to dfutrelle at gmail dot com.
We Hunted the Mammoth relies on support from you, its readers, to survive. So please donate here if you can, or at David-Futrelle-1 on Venmo.
I feel like this guy finally had sex with someone he thought was hot and found that he still felt worthless afterwards. It didn’t magically fix all of his problems like he’s been told it would.
See, on a certain level I understand these guys. Due to some early life issues I really only feel like I’ve had one friend in my entire life, and my love life is… yeah, let’s change the subject…
However, it reminds me of some old Norse story I heard about. Some dude goes to see his son the night before a battle. It’s his son’s first battle and he is clearly apprehensive. So the father says “What would you do if I told you you would surely die tomorrow?”
His son, being a real manly man warrior back when manly man warriors were REAL manly man warriors who wouldn’t run from certain death, replies with some variation of “Since I would have nothing to lose, I would get in the thick of it, lay about with wild abandon, and do my best.”
“Ah,” his father responds. “And if I told you you would certainly live?”
“Then I would have nothing to fear, so I would get in the thick of it, lay about with wild abandon, and do my best.”
His father smiles. “Then you see, it does not matter. Your actions are the same regardless. Do that tomorrow and let the Gods decide the rest.”
In modern parlance, this is called “Outcome independent.”
So, this whole argument the incels have with the “normies” about whether or not they have missed their best chances at happiness by not banging a virgin cheerleader prom queen at 16, or have the same potential for happiness now is equally irrelevant.
They and I have both made our choices. I choose to keep trying, in the hopes that I will at least find something (to cope, yeah?), while they choose to piss all over whatever chances they have for relationships left in their lives.
I don’t get it.
I’ve been bullied all my life.
For being fat, being different (I’m autistic), for not liking the things the others did, for liking the things I did.
Never really had friends.
I don’t like people in general. Especially in groups.
But I don’t hate them.
As long as I can live my hermit life, I’m fine.
Why are so many cis het dudes so angry all the time?
Great line for an anti-inspirational poster. Or maybe a T-shirt. Or a mug. Or how about a charm bracelet with six charms, each with one word: Life / Is / Gonna / Hit / You / Hard.
And here I thought being miserable was the entire point of inceldom. Guess the writer wasn’t blackpilled enough or something.
@Knitting Cat Lady
Anger is the only thing they believe they should feel strongly.
There’s a Sheldon comic I think of sometimes (the site is a pain to search for it).
Sheldon asks his friend: “What would you be if you were brave enough?”
His mate thinks for a minute, then says: “Happy.”
Incels always remind me of that one.
Crab bucket “philosophy” at its worst; even if you’re out of the bucket, you’re not really out of the bucket. It’s got a tiny kernel of truth in that having sex with a beautiful person doesn’t automagically make someone happy or fix all their problems. But neither does immersing themselves in these negativity-reinforcing forums. The thing about real pills is that their effects fade once you stop taking them.
Depression is a confounding factor imo. The only way they can ever agree with people who propose the elimination/subjugation of women as a solution for their problems is if they were already bad people from the start.
Therapy and meds may fix their depression, but it won’t fix their misogyny. We should be careful about proposing it as a solution. (not to mention putting all mentally ill people in the same basket as these guys is obviously gonna increase stigma)
@Kevin. While you are right that misogyny is not caused by mental illness, I think good therapy of many kinds can help people confront and overcome harmful beliefs, regardless of whether those people are mentally ill or not, and regardless of whether those ideas are widely held prejudices or personal to them.
Incels use misogyny to support their weird mix of grandiosity and self-loathing, and seeing a professional therapist could help them unravel and destroy that whole poisoned web they’ve trapped themselves in. The actual problem with suggesting therapy is it only works on people who want to change.
There was this redit post from a 16 year old girl. her parents are divorced. she’s staying with her dad and her dad’s fiancée. She’s getting a 17 year old step brother who is a “recovering incel” that she hasn’t met because of that. Her future step mom asked her to take down her super hero poster that are of Rey and marvel’s captain marvel because they were “triggering” to her son. Her dad backed this. Everyone was super concerned and telling her if she can’t stay with her mom, she needs to tell her dad to put a lock on her door. The incel mom is apparently coddling her son instead of getting him therapy so he’s going to fight it.
That sounds … less than optimal for her (and for him, TBH), considering most incel’s porn fixation and the whole “stepsister” genre.
@Elaine the Witch
It was this thread on “Am I the asshole?”
https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/mgoxmc/aita_for_not_wanting_to_take_down_some/
One of the more terrifying things on that thread is that the poster’s dad is marrying a woman who he dated for two years, and in that entire time OP hadn’t once met her future BIL. Dad’s reason for that? “My dad said it would be best to introduce us when I was already ‘off limits'”
*shudder*
@ therp
Yeah I’m scared for this girl. I hope she can get a lock or go stay with her mom cause I can pretty much tell you should we wake up in the middle of the night to this dude trying to touch her or masturbating in her room.
@schnookums
Yeah it was. And it’s also bad cause the poor girl is like ” well he’s trying to be better so I don’t want to make a fus” like no hun. He’s going to make your life hell. I’ve seen incels perv over there very much blood siblings and cousins. You need to get out
I see this claim made so often in the manosphere and there’s never any evidence to back it up. Other than racist Jim Crow area false accusations (like against Emmett Till) this is just not a thing. At all. Yet it’s treated as an indisputable fact.
@WWTH
Given their usual penchant for exaggeration, I expect that should be read as “When I shower a strange woman with creepy pickup lines she calls a bouncer over.”
ugh, these neo-nazi incels are not giving up…
In fact I think the Capital riots have emboldened them.
TRIGGER WARNING for luddyness and gun violence:
https://eradica.wordpress.com/2021/04/03/gun-sales-and-the-second-amendment-are-irrelevant/#comment-76522
It’s really bad and they need to be stopped…
@Mogwitch One of the other mistakes when recommending (to incels or others) therapy is making it sound like a chore, instead of explaining the concrete ways in which that can help, even when it doesn’t directly fix your issues. IMO we don’t do enough to “vulgarize” therapy and ofc in the US at least the cost is an issue.
@Elaine the Witch Holy. Shit. I’m scared for the girl. Whatever they mean by “recovering incel” this guy should be more than “recovering” to even be allowed to be near a girl. If a Star Wars poster can trigger him, he’s not recovered.
That’s the part I can’t get over. Stop putting other people ahead of your own kids, FFS!
Because we all know it’s not going to stop at taking down a couple of posters.
@kevin
The girl talked about how she is a nerd, she has a lot of collectables like that.. That in itself will end up being an issue, Incels hate nerd girls
@bookworm in a Hijab
I don’t know if they dad just doesn’t know what an incel is or what this is going to mean, But he’s asking his daughter to cater to a guy who’s going to think she’s a fuck hole that deserves to be abused.
Trigger warning for Anon Get-it-On’s link: In addition to pearl clutching “OMG, we live in a police state, fend for yourself and only you can protect yourself” BS, in the comments below there is some sort of White Pride=Gay Pride thing going on with images of guys whacking the donkey. Not quite the skat porn thing I recall from a link to that site previously, but if it would offend you, you have been warned.
Anywho, concerning the whole thing about the recovering incel and the 16 year old girl… well, I really regret my previous comment about understanding these guys now…
by the way for the reddit girl, this is how her father reacted when she decided to tell him about all the stuff she was feeling and with everyones concern about her safety.
“So uhm…talked to my dad about the situation, and mentioned this post during his lunch break (he’s work from home). He’s…not happy with me right now. Yelled that I don’t trust him, accused Mom of poisoning me to think that he’d put his sexual gratification over my safety, got really upset I aired family business on Reddit. Wanted to know why I’d put my shitty characters over family.
I have to delete this account now, cause I don’t want him to find it and get angrier. But I thank you all for your advice and compassion, and rest assured an email’s going out to my mom now, followed by a call whenever she gets off work. Thank you so much!”
Elaine,
I’m glad the kiddo has a mom she can call (and potentially go stay with). The dad 100% has his priorities backwards and sideways, and that house is not going to be safe for her until he realizes that his priorities are broken and takes positive steps to ensure her safety.
Like giving her the ability to lock her door.
Like maybe not letting step-bro move in with her if he’s so close to slipping back into misogynistic internet rage that he cannot even risk seeing a captain marvel poster.
Like, maybe not letting step-bro move in if you’ve got so many concerns about her needing to be “off limits” that you’ve not introduced them early on in the dating/engagement game.
His daughter’s safety needs to be a higher priority to him than his stepson’s comfort.
Safety > Comfort.
And his ex hasn’t poisoned his daughter’s attitude towards him. His disregard for her safety is the problem.
I hope her mom can make alternate arrangements for her safety, and that her dad eventually gets his head on enough to realize why she feels concerned.
…Whoops. Going to hop off my soapbox, now.
@Contrapangloss
Full stop. Her father is not a safe person and never will be.
That whole situation brings to mind the news articles and such of things like that going real bad and people going “But how could they not know?” Uh, yeah, they did know.