So in the Red Pill subreddit, the Alpha dudes are circle-jerking over an obviously staged “prank” video by a Russian YouTuber (who has plainly acknowledged that some of his videos are staged) in which women are enticed into taking a ride in his Lamborghini right in front of their boyfriends! Except not really!
But all this doesn’t really matter, because in the midst of the conversation, one of the regulars offers this bit of Red Pill wisdom:
![Laconises 6 points 20 hours ago I blame the "boyfriends" (how I hate that word). First they're ogling some kid's car and thereby demonstrating what pathetic, materialistic failures they are, then they let their women actually get in the car with the kid. Repulsive behaviour. If you don't treat your women like cattle, someone else will. permalinkembedsaveparentreportgive gold [–]Endorsed ContributorScholarInRed 0 points 8 hours ago If you don't treat your women like cattle, someone else will. This needs to be made into a poster and distributed to every male under 14.](https://i0.wp.com/www.wehuntedthemammoth.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/10/cattle.png?resize=527%2C325&ssl=1)
Sometimes the only proper response is a reaction gif.
Oh, and if anyone wants to actually make a poster of the quote, DO IT.
H/T — r/TheBluePill
@Monzach:
When I was a kid, every summer my family packed my suitcase and I got sent to my countryside relatives for a couple of weeks or even a whole month; my gran had two younger brothers, both with small farms (dairy, meat and grain) of their own, about 20 to 30 cows per farm.
Part of it was to get me off their hair, part of it was to keep me better fed since we were rather poor and kindergarten was closed for a whole lot of summer, and no doubt a part of it was also to get familiar with life’s realities about where food comes from and how much work has to be done before it ends up on our plates. But I mostly remember playing with cats and dogs, riding a horse, learning how to make Karelian pies and feeding calves.
Learning to dodge cow patties fresh from the source was an essential skill to survival, especially when one is sized about three feet tall. Dodging the splatter damage (think of those D&D scatter diagrams) was also equally important, and the fact that some cows like to poop synchronized and recognizing which ones want to go one after another to avoid dodging into their drop zone.
Feeding calves, however, was fun. They’re cute! (And later, delicious in creamy sauce, served with mashed potatoes, butter-fried onion and veggies.)
Second, I have a hunch that redpillers have no idea how one is supposed to treat cattle — with respect, care, and love; you absolutely must respect them, because otherwise they’ll cream you with their sheer body mass advantage, and unlike elsewhere, disbudding cow horns is not that common here, and our cows sprout some majestic bone curves, so watching out for horns is a good idea as well. A cow will disembowel you if you piss it off and it can respond to it.
A happy cow is a productive cow — and that’s why modernized cowsheds have automated brushing stations (think of autowash rollers that activate when a cow moves underneath), automated feeding bowls that ration out food according to chip IDs in their collars/eartags, freedom to go outside and return whenever they feel like it with automated doors, even toys and structures that resemble more open fields with random scattered “rocks” and “bushes”, rather than stalls where they must stand.
I suspect they’re all hat, and no cattle.
They’re also all asshole, and no compassion or love.
Monzach:
And I know only one crop that’s grown in closets…
Presumably it’s “Git off mah field!”
Skiriki:
Walking around with your one cow and guarding it against wolves/thieves is so 19th century.
I actually once tried to find out if something like Karjaharja is commonly in use outside of Finland. It’s just awesome, both as a name and a concept 🙂
@skiriki
“I suspect they’re all hat, and no cattle.”
That is the most glorious use of that phrase that I have ever heard.
I found my faith in humanity…
It hanged itself in a penitentiary. With barbed wire.
It was wrongly accused.
Serious post:
The level of distrust that this shows is incredible. If my significant other wanted to ride around in a Lamborghini (even if it was the one that Alan posted above) then sure, why not? It’s not like she’s going to suddenly forget how much she likes me as soon as I’m out of her vision range.
If your partner does do this, consider dating someone with object permanence next.
The whole “keep an eye on her constantly otherwise she’ll do something bad” really shows just how little they think women are grownups – or how afraid they are of that.
Red Pill serves as a survival mechanism. Underneath the surface of compliance is a great distrust of the patriarchy.
@Arctic Ape
But I bet that they’ve not fought off a bear, like the story sez a great-great grandmother of mine did. With a hay pole as a weapon of choice. (Note: I am not sure if there’s any truth value to the story, but as a story, it sounds awesome. On the other hand, women of my gran’s lineage were tough as nails Northern Savonian women, so it is not out of the question.)
It is! So awesome! (Back then in 70s and 80s we had to do that manually with a grooming brush, and not as often as the cows would have liked it; it was more like sometimes-treat to them.)
WHIRRRRRRRRRR!
http://shl.fi/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/karjaharja.jpg
@mrex:
Thank you, thank you, I’m here all week long, and please try our cow-friendly, cruelty-free milk-grass-and-grainfed veal in creamy sauce or the lacto-ovo vegetarian version of the same. 😀
Flippant post:
Once upon a time, some cows conspired with the rest of the countryside to kill me.
I had made the mistake of leaving the built-up area and was wandering along a country trail with some friends and their dogs. It was getting towards sunset and we were eagerly anticipating the next pub. The trail led us through a field and towards a large group of cows sitting there with their calves, doing whatever it is that cows do with their calves when they’re all together in one group. We started to look for ways around them.
The dogs, however, were having none of that. They saw the calves and, overjoyed, surged forward on their leashes, shouting “HELLO BABY COWS! BABY COWS, HELLO! YOU ARE CUTE AND AWESOME AND ALREADY LARGER THAN WE ARE! HELLO! HOW IS TODAY FOR YOU BABY COWS? HELLO!”
Element #1 of the countryside which conspired to kill me: Dogs, allegedly man’s best friend. Quislings.
Hearing this, the adult cows got up and formed into a phalanx like fucking ancient Greeks, with the calves behind them and the burliest adults up front. Sadly this meant that the dogs were now further away from the calves so they had to bark louder at them to say hello. The adult cows were having none of this, and advanced their formation towards us.
Did I say like Greeks? I should have said like Zulus, because their flanking elements advanced faster, cutting us off from our path of retreat. I’m telling you, these cows were organised. A wall of slowly-walking half-tonnes of beef is a terrifying thing to see.
Element #2 of the countryside which conspired to kill me: Cows. I don’t eat beef but after seeing this, it made me come close to reconsidering.
We didn’t feel like getting trampled, so we backed away in the direction the cows had left for us to retreat in. Unfortunately these cows had their phalanx tactics down pat, because there were no ways out there. They had us backed against a hedgerow. Faced with few options we opted to try to climb through the hedgerow, which is surprisingly difficult whilst dragging a dog by its leash when the dog is alarmed at the fact that the baby cows it wants to say hello to are receding into the distance.
Have you ever tried to climb through a hedgerow while dragging a dog? I don’t recommend it.
Element #3 of the countryside which conspired to kill me: The plants. They should have been neutral in mammal-on-mammal violence, dammit.
Sadly, forming the core of this hedgerow was…
Element #4 of the countryside which conspired to kill me: A barbed wire fence. What the fuck, metal? You were supposed to be our servant. Of all the elements in the countryside you’re the least biological and so the most trustworthy. Now we find you conspiring with the animals and plants against your supposed masters? Betrayal!
Have you ever climbed through a hedgerow inside which is a barbed wire fence whilst dragging a loud dog via a leash? I don’t recommend it.
Once we made it safely back to concrete surroundings and had a pint, the others laughed it off and mourned their torn clothing. I, however, knew better. The countryside was rising against us. It had attempted to assassinate me and failed. This could only mean one thing:
We are living in a retelling of the Terminator movies with rural areas instead of machines, and I am fated to become the general who leads humanity to destroy the countryside forever. It had attempted to kill me off early when I was unaware, and had failed.
Now it’s my move.
@EJ (The Other One) — laughed my ass off. 😀 😀 😀
Congratulations, you’ve discovered the ancient instincts of modern cows. 😀
http://www.artcountrycanada.com/images/brenders-fortress.jpg
EJ (The Other One). I’m thinking the cows heard a very different (and probably more accurate) translation of what your dogs said than you relayed to us. *nod*
OH! And I think you’re giving nature too much credit. Someone grew those hedges, and built the fence, and put the cows there… Farmers! It’s really farmers out to get you. You thwarted their long game. It’s your turn. You know what to do.
@sn0rkmaiden
Yes, that oligarch’s grandkid is awful, and the videos aren’t staged, he’s seeing what he can get people to do for money. His thought process is pretty similar to red pullers though: other people are objects to be used. Ugh. I think his gramps should bring him back to Siberia and cut him off from his funds while he can, geeze.
Re: treat women like cattle
Those idiots know farmers have to get up at the crack o’dawn every day, right? And if you have animals you never get a vacation day. Christmas? Animals and chores still need to be done. It is a lot more work than these idiots have ever had to do.
I mean, I can understand being alarmed that one’s partner is willing to trust a stranger enough to hop in the car with them, because—depending on context—that could be a pretty breathtaking lack of personal safety awareness. I can understand having a talk about, “Um, so what if that guy would have turned out to be a chainsaw murderer or something?”
But I’m 100% with you on the “OH NO SHE HAS FALLEN PREY TO TEH ALFA” panic.
It reminds me of some married men I know who make it a bragging point that they never, ever ride alone in a car with a non-relative woman. Not even if they’ve known this woman forever. Not even if she is happily married to someone else. This is supposedly a marriage-saver. And I can’t help but think, “…Uh, what exactly do you expect to *happen* on the 30-minute drive between your house and the airport?”
It’s that pernicious idea that sex will just *happen* to two (heterosexual) adults if left alone together for any length of time. Like it’s some kind of accident. Like self-control and hormones cannot exist in the same body at once. “I know that was wrong, but I just couldn’t help myself.” “We never MEANT for it to go this far.” “It was only supposed to be coffee!”
Nope, nope, nope. It takes a thousand little choices to get from, “I’m in a relationship, but your car is pretty” to “Yes, let’s get a hotel room”. And if you can’t trust your partner enough to make honorable choices, then your relationship is already on the rocks. And if you think they might accidentally cheat on you, then you have majorly problematic ideas about sex, and/or your partner’s intelligence, and/or human beings in general.
But I’m convinced that this paranoia is a byproduct of rape culture. Sex being something that “just happens” is a crucial foundation for victim-blaming.
I decided to take a look at this video that sparked this discussion. Some of the girls he approached refused, and those that did get in the car didn’t seem to give any indication that he had gotten anywhere with them. So it is pretty much a case of the redpillers blowing things out of proportion.
Off-topic:
Huh. So Kotaku in Action is… still in action (i.e busily typing at each other). Read this stirring speech! Churchill had nothing on this clump of words!
Lol, that’s extra hilarious given the number one way to smash a controller in frustration is to continue trying a boss fight with the same tactics before you’re ready for it. Their strategy, it is doomed.
“They’re just doing materialism wrong! The right way to do it is by flying off the handle and spinning cranky theories every time you see a stupid prank video!”
Also, KiA? You’re just fucking gamers. Your “honed reflex” ain’t shit. There’s a very good reason why everyone is laughing at you: It’s because you can’t even pry yourselves out from behind your damn consoles to actually do something of worth in the real world. And because everything you read as you being challenged to a “boss fight”, is actually you being bested by your betters. Also, all your smashed equipment is not “bragging rights”, it’s just more evidence that you’re an overgrown tantrum-throwing toddler who can’t be trusted with expensive stuff. Grow the fuck up and get a grip on something besides your poor abused joystick, already.
Reminds me of the idiots, who loved Starship Troopers, cause they thought it promoted militarism.
@PI
I’ve been a rooster teeth fan for years. And I’ve kind of let YouTube replace watching TV for me so I watch all the AH stuff lol. 🙂
Lol, “picked a fight with gamers”. Yeah, cause it totally wasn’t gamers who had the absurd overreaction to a woman even *proposing* she was going to talk about sexism in video games. Totally wasn’t gamers who turned a simple video saying “this is why saving the princess is a problem” into a massive years long harassment campaign.
@AnAPB
Oh did you see the copy pastas people were making of that, it was amazing 🙂
@Robjec
No, I didn’t. Do you have any links? Such a rich source of material XD
I know these guys sympathised with Immortan Joe but this is ridiculous.
I know I’m being sort of “Captain Obvious” here, but these guys are morons. The only hope is if they are just young morons, and therefore have many years and experiences ahead of them to assist in their growing-the-hell-up. Some people just gotta learn the hard way. Otherwise, if they are older and more solidified in their stupidity, they just don’t seem to have that much going for them–and all that is awaiting them are the curses that I lay upon them regarding pits of legos and seasonal allergies.
Oh well, some brain bleach time, for those who may need it:
[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=19Ha0D-iuVk&w=420&h=315%5D