Categories
a voice for men a woman is always to blame antifeminism antifeminist women erin pizzey evil women excusing abuse FemRAs GirlWritesWhat imaginary oppression men who should not ever be with women ever misogyny MRA paul elam playing the victim rape rape culture warren farrell

Voices of Hatred: A look at the noxious views of six of the speakers at A Voice for Men's upcoming conference

Curious about the views of the people scheduled to speak at A Voice for Men’s “Men’s Issues” conference next week? Here’s a little video guide. CONTENT WARNING: Domestic violence, rape, incest.

If you’d like to have their quotes in writing for future reference, here’s a transcript of the quotes used in the video. I’ve linked to the source of each quote (or to posts of mine that discuss the quotes in greater detail). Enjoy!

Mike Buchanan has said:

I believe girls learn at a young age that whining gets them what they want, especially from over-indulgent parents who might later wonder why their daughters became Entitlement Princesses. Inevitably these girls continue whining into adolescence and adulthood because they continue to get what they want. It’s up to men to break the cycle …

Men living in houses with cellars can put a sign on the cellar door, ‘The Whine Cellar’, and politely direct whining women towards it. In houses without a cellar, the smallest room in the house – or possibly the garden shed – could be designated ‘The Whine Box’.

Mike Buchanan is a speaker at the “Men’s Issues” conference in Detroit organized by A Voice for Men

Mike Buchanan is a voice of hatred

SOURCE for Buchanan’s quote

Stefan Molyneux has said:

Women who choose the assholes will fucking end this race. They will fucking end this human race, if we don’t start holding them a-fucking-ccountable. … Women who choose assholes guarantee child abuse. Women who choose assholes guarantee criminality, sociopathy. Politicians, all the cold-hearted jerks who run the world came out of the vaginas of women who married assholes.

And I don’t know how to make the world a better place without holding women accountable for choosing assholes. Your dad was an asshole because your mother chose him. Because it works on so many women. If “asshole” wasn’t a great reproductive strategy it would have been gone long ago. Women keep that black bastard flame alive. They cup their hands around it, they protect it with their bodies. They keep the evil of the species going by continually choosing these guys.

If being an asshole didn’t get women, there would be no assholes left. If women chose nice guys over assholes we would have a glorious and peaceful world in one generation. Women determine the personality traits of the men because women choose who to have sex with, and who to have children with, and who to expose those children to. …

Your dad is who he is fundamentally because your mother was willing to fuck him and have you. Willing and eager to fuck the monster. Stop fucking monsters and we get a great world. Keep fucking monsters, we get catastrophes, we get war, we get nuclear weapons, we get national debt, we get incarcerations … Women worship at the feet of the devil and wonder why the world is evil. And then you know what they say? We’re victims!

Stefan Molyneux is a scheduled speaker at the “Men’s Issues” conference in Detroit organized by A Voice for Men.

Stefan Molyneux is a voice of hatred

SOURCE for Molyneux’s quote. NOTE: The text above is a more complete version of the slightly truncated quote used in the video, which was edited for clarity, for length, and to remove some repetition.

Erin Pizzey has said:

If you’re referring to Paul’s statement that many or most women fantasize about being taken, I’m sorry but that’s the truth. That doesn’t mean they want to be raped, but it’s a fantasy I think almost all women have. And I think he went on to say that feminists like Andrea Dworkin who were and are so obsessed with rape are really projecting their own unconscious sexual frustration because men don’t give them enough attention. Andrea was a very sad lonely woman like this–I didn’t know her but I knew of her, and I knew Susan Browmiller and you can just read her stuff to see it there.

Erin Pizzey is a scheduled speaker at the “Men’s Issues” conference in Detroit organized by A Voice for Men

Erin Pizzey is a voice of hatred

SOURCE of Pizzey’s quote. NOTE: The text above is a complete version of the slightly truncated quote used in the video, which was edited for clarity.

Karen Straughan has written:

I used to live under a young couple with a baby. I’d listen as she followed him from room to room upstairs, stomping, slamming things, throwing things, screaming. After about an hour, he’d eventually hit her, and everything would go quiet. An hour after that, they’d be out with the baby in the stroller, looking perfectly content with each other.

A man I know who has experience with men in abusive relationships would get his clients to answer a questionnaire. Things like, “after the violence, did you have sex?” “If so, how would you rate the sex?” 100% of men in reciprocally abusive relationships said “yes” to the first, and “scorching” to the second.

He also posited that the much-quoted cycle of violence–the build-up, the explosion, the honeymoon period–correlates with foreplay, orgasm and post-coital bliss.

Erin Pizzey called it “consensual violence”, and said in the main, that was the type she’d see at her shelter. It is also the type that results in the most severe injuries in women, surprise surprise, likely because our “never EVER hit a woman” mentality has those men waiting until they completely lose control of their emotions before giving their women what they’re demanding.

Karen Straughan is a speaker at the “Men’s Issues” conference in Detroit organized by A Voice for Men

Karen Straughan is a voice of hatred

SOURCE for Straughan’s quote.

Warren Farrell has said:

The worst aspect of dating from the perspective of many men is how dating can feel to a man like robbery by social custom …

Evenings of paying to be rejected can feel like a male version of date rape.

If a man ignoring a woman’s verbal “no” is committing date rape, then a woman who says “no” with her verbal language but “yes” with her body language is committing date fraud. …

We have forgotten that before we began calling this date rape and date fraud, we called it exciting.

Somehow, women’s romance novels are not titled He Stopped When I Said “No”. They are, though, titled Sweet Savage Love, in which the woman rejects the hand of her gentler lover who saves her from the rapist and marries the man who repeatedly and savagely rapes her. …

It is important that a woman’s “noes” be respected and her “yeses” be respected. And it is also important when her nonverbal “yeses” … conflict with those verbal “noes” that the man not be put in jail for choosing the “yes” over the “no.” He might just be trying to become her fantasy.

Warren Farrell is a speaker at the “Men’s Issues” conference in Detroit organized by A Voice for Men

Warren Farrell is a voice of hatred

SOURCE for Farrell’s quote.

Warren Farrell has said:

Incest is like a magnifying glass. In some circumstances it magnifies the beauty of the relationship, and in others it magnifies the trauma. …

When I get my most glowing positive cases, 6 out of 200, the incest is part of the family’s open, sensual style of life, wherein sex is an outgrowth of warmth and affection. …

[M]illions of people who are now refraining from touching, holding, and … caressing their children, when that is really a part of a caring, loving expression, are repressing the sexuality of a lot of children and themselves. Maybe this needs repressing, and maybe it doesn’t.

Warren Farrell is a speaker at the “Men’s Issues” conference in Detroit organized by A Voice for Men

Warren Farrell is a voice of hatred

SOURCE for Farrell’s quote. I have removed a word that appears in the original interview but that Farrell insists he did not say.

Paul Elam has said:

In the name of equality and fairness, I am proclaiming October to be Bash a Violent Bitch Month.

I’d like to make it the objective for the remainder of this month, and all the Octobers that follow, for men who are being attacked and physically abused by women – to beat the living shit out of them. I don’t mean subdue them, or deliver an open handed pop on the face to get them to settle down. I mean literally to grab them by the hair and smack their face against the wall till the smugness of beating on someone because you know they won’t fight back drains from their nose with a few million red corpuscles.

And then make them clean up the mess.

Now, am I serious about this?

No. Not because it’s wrong. It’s not wrong.

But it isn’t worth the time behind bars or the abuse of anger management training that men must endure if they are uppity enough to defend themselves from female attackers.

Paul Elam is the central organizer of the “Men’s Issues” conference in Detroit, and the founder of A Voice for Men

Paul Elam is a voice of hatred

SOURCE for Elam’s quote.

For a detailed look at the homophobia of Anne Cools, another speaker at the conference, see here.

Big thanks to everyone who helped with the video!

 

 

 

873 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Isabelle
Isabelle
7 years ago

@elizabeth

So I can sell you a bottle of donkey piss, as long as I call it “Eau de Rose”? Cause its all in the name…sure, make sense.

Marie
7 years ago

@kittehs

eh I really don’t like being all picky on grammer and shit. I mean, its just like….if you can understand what someone’s saying it works. I feel weird agreeing with the troll here.

But I know I have shit grammer sometimes and I hope thats not a problem.

@eliza-erin

fuck off I don’t feel like holding your hand and explaining shit. Or at least get more entertaining.

youre fucking oppressor won’t listen to you if you’re nice trust me I’ve seen people try it fails.

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
7 years ago

And now I want laska, but I don’t have all the ingredients in the house. Curse you, Mammotheers!

I’m going to guess 20-something American guy whose knowledge of both the UK and British private schools comes from reading Harry Potter. What I don’t understand is why so many trolls pick this particular topic. It’s so boring, and so pointless. They aren’t even going to get any decent quotes to mine out of it, so why bother?

pallygirl
pallygirl
7 years ago

And now shifts to concern trolling.

Reading for comprehension isn’t your thing, is it? We haven’t condemned being nice to others, in fact a lot of feminism is a request to be nice to others. What others have condemned, and I agree, is that trying to make social change from a minority group by being nice doesn’t fucking get you anywhere.

It hasn’t worked with racism, sexism, or any other ism you can think of.

Why don’t you flounce off to the MRA site and ask them to be nice, there’s a nice dear.

Marie
7 years ago

And like seriously

No matter how nice you are when you’re alling out ppl they say you aren’t being nice enough.

My fucking stepmom whines about getting her feelings hurt when me nad my sister call her homophobic behavior homophobic.

My sister tried gently holding her hand and stepmom walked all over her.

Sister bothered asserting herself, stepmom whined about how we were ‘calling her names’ by calling her sexist and homophobic.

Nothing is nice enough for these people.

kittehserf
7 years ago

Fuck, you can’t even read for comprehension. The BS is you trotting out the old “Women [or any other oppressed group] should be nice to the people oppressing them!”

It. Doesn’t. Work.

If you’d ever been a feminist, if you knew the first thing about history, you’d know this. As fruiteloopsie’s already pointed out, all it achieves is to make the oppressors think their behaviour’s acceptable. It means men simply ignore what is said, this fuckwitted “be nice” crap. You seem to be ignoring – or maybe willfully unaware – that men as a class are not told to be nice. They’re not told to moderate their language, to avoid ruffling feathers, to be soft and pleasant and not disturb the status quo. Because that’s what it’s about when women are told that.

I find it harder and harder to believe you’re not a sockpuppet. I rather hope you are, rather than someone so blinkered and downright stupid.

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
7 years ago

Saying that you’re going to leave and then not doing so isn’t very nice. Tsk tsk.

Auntie Alias
Auntie Alias
7 years ago

White supremacists with good intentions? None, ever. They are racists. MRAs are misogynists. Both are motivated by hate.

Here’s what a couple of MRAs told me in the last couple hours:

Nothing wrong with masturbation Alias. Maybe give it a shot.

There is nothing wrong with knocking the shit out of someone who assaults you. Women don’t get some kind of magical pass on this due to their gender. Maybe you should quit assuming men will give you a pass on violence and stop beating them if you have a problem with it.

Do you think being nice to these charmers is going to result in a happy chorus of Kumbaya?

contrapangloss
7 years ago

Marie, did duck over. Not sure how useful my advice is, but, it exists.

My family accidentally ran a home for geriatric dogs, once upon a time. Elwood the Eldest couldn’t get up the stairs and was blinder than a doorknob (and about as clever as one). He’d sit at the base of the stairs and bark if he thought everyone was up there, and wanted company.

it sounded a bit like: ‘Woof. Pant, pant, deep breath. Woof. Pant, pant, pant, deep breath.’

kittehserf
7 years ago

Marie – we all have lousy grammar and typos sometimes. Difference is we don’t brag about it like it’s a badge of honour, or pretend that it isn’t important to communication.

kittehserf
7 years ago

Nothing is nice enough for these people.

Marie, you nailed it!

Especially with MRAs. Being female means we’re never nice enough for them.

Marie
7 years ago

@kittehs

yeah I assumed you were just making fun of the troll and her weird private shcool thing..

idk i’m not like trying to make a weird point I’m just rambling

sorry if ‘i’m being an ass.

elizabeth
elizabeth
7 years ago

@fruitloopsie I can only half agree atm sorry. It’s been my overwhelming experience that if you are nice to people they tend to respond nicely, for example the way you are responding to me is nice. And if I had been saying not nice things I expect your general reaction would probably not be to respond in a nice way to me.

“You have to stand up to the hateful garbage that they spew. Calling out bigotry or just awful stuff is not mean it’s actually the opposite it’s being awesome. You are standing up for the weak and wounded.” – I agree I guess I think it’s awesome to stand up for the weak and wounded too. Erm… trying to think if there is a way to do that whilst being nice…. Will it have the same effect to stand up for someone in a compassionate way without having a go at whoever wounded them?…. the problem I imagine with that is that when people shout at others for example, they generally won’t react in a way such as “ok” and not do it again. Instead it’s more likely to be provoking them and making them want to respond with an equal and opposite reaction kind of thing..

Marie
7 years ago

@erin/elizabeth

It’s been my overwhelming experience that if you are nice to people they tend to respond nicely, f

wow where are you living I’d like to go there….

Like good for you but that is so untrue for a lot of us

elizabeth
elizabeth
7 years ago

@Isabelle “So I can sell you a bottle of donkey piss, as long as I call it “Eau de Rose”? Cause its all in the name…sure, make sense.” – I didn’t say it was all in the name or I didn’t mean that. I think the name and product are important. people won’t want donkey piss. and people won’t want a bottle of rose scent if you call it yukstench or smth. So I am saying both the name and the movement are important.

pallygirl
pallygirl
7 years ago
brooked
7 years ago

cloudiah | June 20, 2014 at 2:57 pm
“I’m a feminist, or at least I was. But I’m totally disillusioned with it now. It just causes arguments between genders. As you can see in this comment thread. Ideally the movement needs to be tweaked to perpetuate love+peace between people of all genders. Then I’ll support fmism/mfism (those would be fairer titles, implying both men and women should be treated well, +they are fun and catchy).”

fmism & mfism are “fun and catchy”? That is seriously the most hilarious thing I’ve heard all day, so thanks for that I guess.

contrapangloss | June 20, 2014 at 3:29 pm
Fhum-is-mist slash muif-is-mist is the most fun/closest I cold figure.

Fhum should be pronounced like trying to make the sound of a freshly lit propane grill, while muif should sound kind of like a cross between a meow and a seal barking.

This thread is caught in some sort of flounce time flux, so I thought I’d replay my two fave comments from it’s salad days. Those sound descriptions are golden, contrapangloss. Good times.

elizabeth
elizabeth
7 years ago

maybe u should come live in england Marie O.o sorry that’s true for your experience. I don’t know if it’s better generally in england or smth…

Marie
7 years ago

And you want to know what, people fucking react differently when they’re called out. Exs with my family:

Stepmom-no matter how nice it is it’s not nice enough.
Dad- never talks about problem.
Mom- digs hole, after a while calms down and usually (not always) gets it and stops doing it
Brother- I can fucking cuss him out for it and once I say one line about what was wrong he’ll go ‘okay I guess I wont’ do that again.’

Different people, different reaction, surprise, nice wasnt’ always neccessary, nice didn’t always work.

(Sis exists but I think usually she calls me out not the other way around)

Auntie Alias
Auntie Alias
7 years ago

@Marie

wow where are you living I’d like to go there….

It’s called Utopia. 😛

Marie
7 years ago

@elizabeth

maybe u should come live in england Marie O.o sorry that’s true for your experience. I don’t know if it’s better generally in england or smth…

yeah somehow I doubt that….

any mammothers actually in engalnd want to butt in? Is it a magical paradise free from oppression if you phrase tihngs nicely?

kittehserf
7 years ago

You’re fine, Marie, no assing there. 😀

PALLYGIRL THAT HOOD IS SO GORGEOUS

::faints::

elizabeth
elizabeth
7 years ago

@Marie and I’m not saying you should be nice to your oppresser at all. I am talking about the feminist movement only not dealing with oppressors, I would have thought going to the police or smth would be the way to deal with being oppressed but obviously I’m no expert and I’m not trying to be. I’m just talking about how the feminist movement could achieve gender equality fastest.

katz
7 years ago

You breakfastists are on a (cinnamon) roll.

dustedeste
dustedeste
7 years ago

That hood’s cool, pallygirl! The red one with the three buttons is more my personal style, but I’d totally make them both if I had the faintest idea how to crochet from a pattern… one of these days, haha!

1 16 17 18 19 20 35
%d bloggers like this: