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Stardew Valley PTA? New “Cuckoldry Removal” game mod keeps your waifu from climbing another man’s tree

Well this is awkward

By David Futrelle

Is Stardew Valley just a miniature version of the infamous Harper Valley of Jeannie C. Riley’s classic song, a hotbed of debauched infidelity in which the residents secretly swap a lot more than yams?

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If you can't be with the dick you love, love the dick you're with

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What do women want? One woman-hating man has the answer!

Fellas! If you’ve got a girlfriend, and you don’t want to lose her, don’t ever leave her alone for more than a few days at a time, because if you do, she’ll feel so penis-deprived that she’ll cheat on you with whatever penis-having person she can get her hands on first.

That, at least, is the contention of C. M. Sturges, the woman-hating, gun-loving founder of the blog Apocalypse Cometh. And you can trust his insights on all things related to relationships because, as he boasts,

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