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Red Piller: Evil girlfriends will fatten you up to make you unsexy then dump you for a sexier guy because THAT makes total sense, right?

It’s a TRAP!

By David Futrelle

Beware of women bearing potato chips, because they’re out to kill your sexy, sexy body and make you, like, a fatty. Especially beware when the woman in question is your longterm girlfriend, because this is all a devious plot to kill her feelings of attraction towards you because secretly all women want boyfriends they don’t think are attractive, or something.

Sorry, I’m having a little trouble understanding this latest theory from the Red Pill subreddit. So let’s go through it in detail and see if it makes more sense the second time around.

“Food is a trap. Don’t fall for it,” the Red Piller known as NorthEasternNomad declared in a recent post.

[A longterm] partner will almost always try and “fatten you up.” But that makes me less attractive, you say. Why would she want that?

Simple: It reduces your SMV [Sexual Market Value].

Ok, it’s still not making sense yet, but let’s hear this dingus out.

Validation is sex for women. Its their primary need, in terms of what they get from men. Sex itself is secondary; its the validation they are after.

Huh. This sounds just a teensy bit like the sort of thing guys tell themselves when they’re not very good at sex.

Meanwhile, SMV for men is determine by a LARGE margin, by physique. Thats not the ONLY factor, but is a BIG factor.

Yeah, if you get off of the Red Pill subreddit and into the real world for a few minutes you’ll notice rather quickly that women tend to be flexible on this point.

By “fattening you up” she is essentially taking you off the sexual market. Making it so that other women, are not even interested.

But, again, even if we accept the premise that fat or even slightly pudgy dudes are inherently unsexy to all women, which isn’t true, this makes no sense because it means the girlfriend in question doesn’t find you sexy either.

This gives her the power. It places your existence, within her frame.

Oh noes!

Think about if: If you are off the sexual market, Dread Game is impossible.

“Dread Game,” by the way, means manipulating a woman so she’s constantly worrying that you’ll leave her. It’s a favorite strategy of the Red Pillers, because at heart they’re a bunch of manipulative abusers (or manipulative abuser wannabes).

If no one wants your fat ass, she never needs to worry. The power dynamic shifts to favor her to an immense degree. But this also means you can never, ever make her tingle; if there’s no risk inherent in the relationship, no dread, her hamster has basically rolled over and gone to sleep…until someone ELSE wakes it up.

So her strategy is to make you fat and unattractive … then to move on to a new, non-fat guy? Why? Why go through all this trouble when she could simply have you in your original form?

Do not let her junk food fixation, become your way of life. She will try. SUbtly, at first. Desert night once per week. Then next thing you know, she’s buying potato chips and ice cream on every shopping run.

POTATO CHIPS ARE THE DEVIL!

Maybe she knows why she does it; more probably she doesn’t even understand her compulsion to fatten up her husband or long time partner. But the fact remains: The result is your removal from the sexual marketplace completely, the utter inability to use dread game, and her complete stranglehold on your sex life and the relationship as a whole.

This leads to staleness and boredom. A complete lack of emotional tingles. And we ALL know where the next step is from there.

In case anyone didn’t get what NorthEasternNomad was implying here, one of the commenters made a little diagram.

Get tingles > fuck > marry > lower partners smv > no more tingles > divorce > get tingles

Huh. Wouldn’t it be simpler to just do

Get tingles > fuck > marry > fuck more

In addition to everything else wrong with it, the Red Pill just seems needlessly complicated.

H/T — r/TheBluePill

Send tips to dfutrelle at gmail dot com.

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Tyke
Tyke
2 years ago

I have so many questions. Did the composer of this nonsense fall asleep during Hansel and Gretel porn or something? What is going on? Who has time for all this? Why would someone want their partner to be afraid and anxious? Who is phone?!

vomitinmothalittlebecauseofmrasetc
vomitinmothalittlebecauseofmrasetc
2 years ago

Just Desert Night, no doubt.

Big Titty Demon
Big Titty Demon
2 years ago

Meanwhile, SMV for men is determine by a LARGE margin, by physique.

But what? I thought that the evil gold-diggers were only after the monies and the status and that was why they are so morally bankrupt.

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
2 years ago

If a woman is trying to fatten you up; check whether she lives in a gingerbread house. If so; get out of there!

Naglfar
Naglfar
2 years ago

I’m not fat or a man, but IIRC I heard somewhere that the majority of fatphobic discrimination was against women. I’m sure there is discrimination against fat men, but I’m not sure this plot could ever work even if it was real. Especially because I’ve seen a lot of fat men with skinny women but not nearly as many of the inverse, which would imply that being fat doesn’t lower a man’s desirability (or fictitious “smv”) as much as they think.

Dalillama
Dalillama
2 years ago

I think the whole thing hinges on the idea that women are instinct-driven automatons. The woman with a good man wants to keep him, so she instinctively fattens him up to keep other women away, but then, as an unforeseen side effect, she loses her own attraction to him moves on to a hotter guy to repeat the cycle.

epronovost
epronovost
2 years ago

I wonder what happens in this guy crazy conspiracy theory when a man says: I don’t want to eat junk food, I’m on a diet. My personnal theory is that a woman who buys deserts for her boyfriend and other kinds of salty, sugary or fat treats is doing so because she thinks her boyfriend will like those treats and she wants to please him. Is that so hard to believe?

Cyborgette
Cyborgette
2 years ago

WTF. This sounds like a porn parody of an obscure Stephen King story, or something.

Hypatia's Daughter
Hypatia's Daughter
2 years ago

epronovost
No, it’s more like:
“Good wives are supposed to serve the foods her man likes.” If she doesn’t, she’s a nagging, controlling bitch (just like his mother who wouldn’t let him eat dessert until he ate his peas.)
HE is the man of the house – HE decides what he eats!
But if he gets fat or sick from eating his favorite foods, she is a bad wife who served them an unhealthy diet. Because adult men are not responsible for the food they stuff in their face – women are.
Just another variation on Women being “damned if they do, and damned if they don’t”

Katherine the Adequate
Katherine the Adequate
2 years ago

Hmm. Maybe I fixate on spelling errors too much, but pretty much all I got out of this was I’m positive I’ve never offered my husband a desert. Not once.

He doesn’t really like Las Vegas, he isn’t disappointed he missed a chance to see the Grand Canyon once, and he doesn’t think St. George, UT is very pretty.

KindaSortaHarmless
KindaSortaHarmless
2 years ago

Wait, I thought these Red Pillocks wantedwomen to make them sammiches.

Naglfar
Naglfar
2 years ago

@Katherine the Adequate
If it makes you feel any better. I’ve never offered any partners deserts either. I just didn’t think people liked receiving deserts after dinner. Too dry and too much sand (or ice, in the case of Antarctica).

RaineyH
RaineyH
2 years ago

Hey David, glad to see this post. (People were getting worried earlier today.)

Stay safe, and give ’em hell.

Dormousing_it
Dormousing_it
2 years ago

@KindaSortaHarmless:

I was thinking much the same thing. I thought they wanted us back in the kitchen, whipping up those home-cooked meals.

Shows what I know.

There’s simply no pleasing them.

TacticalProgressive
TacticalProgressive
2 years ago

@Dormousing_it

I was thinking much the same thing. I thought they wanted us back in the kitchen, whipping up those home-cooked meals.

Shows what I know.

There’s simply no pleasing them.

And that is ultimately the crux of the problem. No matter what women do, or what these hate mongers claim, regardless of wither women “get back in the kitchen” (*urgh*) or booted out said kitchen to “keep men from being over fed and leaving them” (wut) or both bs notions at the same time and same or next breath: they will never be satisfied, content or happy.

These ‘reasons’ they give are weak and self-aggrandizing, bad faith rhetoric that serve as absurdly unrealistic goals women can never possibly hope to meet (or anyone really), even though frankly no women should have to feel obligated to fulfill just because of some men or group of men’s sour grapes.

All that is a feature of course, not a bug. And despite their claims to the contrary; it’s also the whole point.

They are sexist, misogynistic, male chauvinist, hate mongering, angry, selfish, self entitled, immature and toxic people with persecution complexes. They are miserable cry bullies and myopic misanthropes who’s whole goal, agenda, desires, intentions and thoughts begin and end with hurting and hating women.

The Cruelty is the point with such ilk. It has been such since time immeasurable, even though it should have been yeeted into the sun for just as long. This ilk fosters, feeds, broods and sustains this line of thinking and seek to universalize it as reality.

And at this point their talking points are just ephemeral nonsense and important rage and virulent hatred that has been spouted ad nausium.

Frustrates the hell out of me seeing this garbage still going on and on with this ilk.

Correction Automatique
Correction Automatique
2 years ago

I’m just amused that this dude is blaming his clear lack of willpower to abstain from eating the junk food, or simply being responsible enough to admit he enjoys it, eats it and owns it, on women. Unless, of course, the women in question all possess superior upper body strength and pin these dudes down force-feeding them cake and crisps against their will. I suppose what may be a horror show for some could be a fantasy for others, but once again junk food addicted red pill boi can’t get laid so it must be someone else’s fault. Sigh.

If the crisps exist in the house and a woman hasn’t bought them, are they really junk food?

Dormousing_it
Dormousing_it
2 years ago

@Correction Automatique:

Reminds me of my father blaming wife number 3 (& 5)* for him eating 14 chocolate chip cookies in one day. His reasoning: She baked them.

*My dad married the same woman twice, with some other poor, hapless lady in between.

Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile
Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile
2 years ago

As someone else said here on a recent “Best of” post: Validation is sex for women. Its their primary need, in terms of what they get from men. Sex itself is secondary; its the validation they are after. And having you focused solely on them, and no one else, provides them enormous amounts of validation. What they need beyond that, they will get by wearing low cut shirts to work and leaning over the cubicles of overweight office workers desperate for female attention, to make them drool a while.

Meanwhile, SMV for men is determine by a LARGE margin, by physique. Thats not the ONLY factor, but is a BIG factor. By “fattening you up” she is essentially taking you off the sexual market. Making it so that other women, are not even interested.

So validation (attention), not sex, is what women are after, and attention from an overweight male coworker helps to fulfill this need.

But attention from a boyfriend is no good unless he’s buff. Maybe being buff makes him a better listener??? This is why a woman will try to ruin a boyfriend’s buffness — so that no other woman wants him. Therefore he can’t take his attention elsewhere. But then his attention isn’t good enough for her because he’s no longer buff!

As you can see, women have no idea what they’re doing. Luckily, this guy has got it all figured out.

occasional reader
occasional reader
2 years ago

Validation is sex for women.

Next time i see a woman validating her transportation title, i will come behind her and murmur in her ear : “How was it, darling ? Happy ? Still tingling ?”
(Never do that at home, kids ! Its creepy and harassment ! Was just here for sarcasm value)

Anyways, it is obvious the woman fault, not the beer while watching sports on the couch all day.

Moggie
Moggie
2 years ago

@Katherine the Adequate:

Hmm. Maybe I fixate on spelling errors too much, but pretty much all I got out of this was I’m positive I’ve never offered my husband a desert. Not once.

It’s possible I’ve been playing Minecraft too much while stuck indoors, because my first thought was “hey, plenty of sand for making glass”.

Nanny Oggs Bosom
Nanny Oggs Bosom
2 years ago

Why do they enjoy sharing their ignorance with the world, do you think? Other than for validation, that is.

Naglfar
Naglfar
2 years ago

@Moggie
There’s not many trees, though, so I prefer the other biomes.

Correction Automatique
Correction Automatique
2 years ago

@dormousing_it

They sound like extraordinary cookies. Have you the recipe?

Sheila Crosby
Sheila Crosby
2 years ago

I put on weight over the last 20 years. Is it my husband’s fault?

Viscaria
Viscaria
2 years ago

Meanwhile, SMV for men is determine by a LARGE margin, by physique.

Making it so that other women, are not even interested.

It places your existence, within her frame.

I can’t even begin to tackle this man’s relationship to women. Can we work on his relationship to commas?

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