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MGTOWs declare war on the insidious enemy of men known as “yoga pants”

It’s ok if dogs wear them, though.

By David Futrelle

A quarter of a century ago, in his seminal The Myth of Male Power, Men’s Rights Activist Warren Farrell warned hapless, horny males of the danger of “miniskirt power” — that is, the hypnotizing power of shapely female asses, which devious women can apparently use to have their (financial) way with men who ostensibly have more power than them. Damn those conniving harpies and their short, short skirts!

Today, men — well, horny straight men anyway — face what some consider a far more insidious enemy: Yoga pants, the allegedly comfortable lower-half coverups popular with the devious, man-exploiting harpies of the current age.

Well, the brave souls of the Men Going Their Own Way movement are having none of it. Here is the MGTOW case against yoga pants, based on my perusal of several dozen recent postings on the subject in the MGTOW subreddit.

Make sure not to laugh at any of these, as the threat of yoga pants is very, very serious and not just some ridiculous crap these guys have come up with to make themselves feel like they’re being oppressed by women who won’t date them they REFUSE to date.

Yoga pants are so tight it’s like these sluts are walking around naked and basically it’s sexual harassment because biology makes men perpetually horny. 

“Wearing yoga pants to work is sexual harassment,” Baldrbaldr complains.

And the bullshit about “men just needing to control themselves?” Well, it’s bullshit. Men can’t but become seriously distracted when half-naked women prance around them. It’s the way we’re made. It’s biology. So fuck off, you bare assed bitches. We’re working.

“Females are an expensive, unknown distraction,” adds fcb98292, sounding a little bit like Jordan Peterson. “I require segregated offices.”

Actually they make women look better than they look naked, which is somehow worse than looking like they’re naked because it’s a LIE or something. 

“You don’t know what they look like naked,” greenleefs informs his fellow MGTOWs. “Those pants lift and squish together.”

Yoga pants enable women to use their ass power to extract wealth from hardworking betas and sex from Chads. 

As one [deleted] commenter sees it:

The yoga pants is to show off their ass so that Chad and beta bucks (depending on which they are stalking) will drool on himself while he throws sex and cash at her.

Yoga pants are basically HiDef streaming porn videos.

Raisins3142 explains:

I think in part they are trying to compete with high speed internet + free internet porn.

Sometimes fat ladies wear them and, ew, gross. 

As ilikerelish puts it:

There should be limits to where they are worn, and there should be a WEIGHT LIMIT for wearing yoga or legging pants.

Bing_Bang_Bam is similarly outraged that “[e]ven fat cows that have rolls and folds that shouldn’t even be there” wear yoga pants — a true “[c]rime against nature.”

Sometimes skinny old ladies wear them and you’re tricked into thinking that they look hot and this is very confusing 

Hegend1999 laments those times “[w]hen you see a good ass in leggings and she turns around then you see that she’s like 70yo…”

Iqbal40862715 is similarly confused that he finds himself attracted to very much older women.

Yoga pants are a net nagative. They make everyone look good and it’s a total mind fuck.

Saw this 80 year old broad in a bathing suit the other day at a pool. She was probably an Elvis groupie in the 50s/legit perfect 10. Now she is cute and in good shape but wrinkly and old.

Goes into a bathroom to change Puts on yoga pants meets up with the grandkids and sure enough looks awesome.

Apparently women in yoga pants can jump right over that mythical wall they’re all supposed to hit at the age of 30 or so.

They’re not actually comfortable 

“They aren’t comfortable,” asserts LJHova, “that’s just the excuse they use to convince themselves they aren’t whores.”

.They smell like ass (probably). 

“I call them stink butts,” SirLonius explains.

You know women wear them multiple times before washing them and just a thin layer between butthole and the outside world.

They enable women to easily engage in casual workplace frottage with hunky dudes

According to Jcart105,

It’s comfy when Chad grinds his cock separated by the [layer] of his pants and thin layer of her yoga pants in the middle of work.

Er, what?

Seeing women in yoga pants is sort of like seeing attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion, or something. 

Global_MGTOW sheds some tears in the rain:

I’ve seen it all already. I’ve seen women wearing a see through shirt in a very public place with thousands of people, including children, showing off her rocket tits implants. I’ve seen girls wearing mini skirts so small that you can constantly see their panties with zero effort. Seen obese landwhales wearing yoga pants with the words “JUICY” written across the back.

All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die.

Ok, I added that bit from Blade Runner at the end. Because, you know, these guys aren’t melodramatic enough already — and trying way too hard to convince themselves and each other of the existential horror of, basically, tight sweatpants.

Seriously, dudes? Seriously?

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Surplus to Requirements, Observer of the Vast Blight-Wing Enstupidation
Surplus to Requirements, Observer of the Vast Blight-Wing Enstupidation
3 years ago

Re: Ayyadurai — isn’t he also known for being a semi-regular topic over at Techdirt, due to his bogus claim to have invented email and his litigiousness over this? (It never ceases to amuse me how so-called “libtertarians” seem to loooove state-enforced monopoly privileges if they happen to be in the form of patents. Or copyrights.)

kupo
kupo
3 years ago

Yet I’m on a feminist blog having to explain why it’s not cool for yet another woman to be harassed out of her job in the gaming industry because she was accused of misandry.

Yep. It just never fucking stops, either. We’re constantly being told we need to have sympathy and patience and bottomless kindness for guys who want us chased out of our hobbies, fired, enslaved, or dead.

Sorry if we get a little uncivil over that.

j
j
3 years ago

I mean, which is it?

Look, I get it. You’re trying to dig as deep as you possibly can into me. But you know ‘which is it’ because I already told you. I was wrong, she was rightfully annoyed that he came in and threw his opinions in a rude way.

(Dare I say… privilege?)

That’s fair. I didn’t affect me if I didn’t want it to. Only a single issue that affected me deeply commanded my attention.

weirwoodtreehugger: chief manatee

Look, I get it. You’re trying to dig as deep as you possibly can into me

Dude. It’s not personal. It’s just that places like this are one of the few in which I don’t have to defend my humanity or explain social justice 101. Any time someone comes in here well actuallying misogyny, it’s not going to go over well. You keep defending yourself instead of demonstrating that you want to learn from your mistake, so I keep replying.

kupo
kupo
3 years ago

Oh hey, some data analytics on those women and LGBTQIA+ people offended by Jessica Price.

https://twitter.com/Spacekatgal/status/1015351860461539331?s=19

comment image

Jesalin: Clit-o-centric Lesbian Goddess
Jesalin: Clit-o-centric Lesbian Goddess
3 years ago

Imma point out that you’re kind of at a crossroad here.

On the one hand you can say summat like: “I’m sorry, you’re right. I’m trying to learn better, it’s just that this programming is difficult to shake and some reactions are just kind of unthinking.” Many people here would be more than willing to help you out on that journey, but only if you mean it.

On the other hand, you can double-down and act like you’re being unfairly persecuted and refuse to learn anything. In which case you’ll likely be batted around like a ball of yarn by a hyper kitten.

All in all, it’s completely up to you.

Paradoxical Intention - Resident Cheeseburger Slut

I would also like to mention i.e. Jessica being fired that one of her male coworkers was also fired for defending her.

kupo
kupo
3 years ago

The coworker is named Peter Fries. I can’t anything negative at all from him. This is the only tweet I found on the topic.

https://twitter.com/Peter_Fries/status/1014600351628922881?s=19

Jesalin: Clit-o-centric Lesbian Goddess
Jesalin: Clit-o-centric Lesbian Goddess
3 years ago

Holy flipping spork-babies, the comments on that tweet!

weirwoodtreehugger: chief manatee

I’m betting most of those were bots/socks too. Lots of accounts with small numbers of tweets and followers.

dslucia
dslucia
3 years ago

@Jesalin:

this programming is difficult to shake and some reactions are just kind of unthinking.

Speaking as a mostly-straight white male myself, this sentence is a lot more true than many people who have equivalent privilege to me probably realize. One of the things I very much had to unlearn when I first started reading this website was the reflexive response that criticisms of white/male privilege felt like criticisms of me personally. Ideas like “all white people are racist” and “all men are sexist” sounded completely unreal to me, because I was far more ignorant at the time and didn’t fully understand the ways in which I had ingrained racist and sexist ideas. In fact, I didn’t even have a complete understanding of the ways sexism and racism work in today’s society. Once I realized that, I decided that I wasn’t really qualified to comment on the subjects in the first place and elected to mostly lurk and read the comments rather than actively participate.

And I’m still learning, too. I can’t act like I’m a perfect ally, but I can continue taking in the facts and opinions and experiences that I read and hear to better inform my own perspective and the way I engage with other people about sociopolitical topics.

At the end of the day, cisnormative, heteronormative, white men don’t know everything.

Mattie
Mattie
3 years ago

“ass power”
I died and now I’m dead.

ellesar
ellesar
3 years ago

So can we ban arse crack jeans too? I only ever see these on men, and far too frequently. It is surprising how often a man feels the need to bend right over or get in a squatting position and his shirt is far too short!

Who?
Who?
3 years ago

What we as male poster have allways have to remember:
The topics discused here are often very personal for other members.
Women and their opinions been less important then men and their opinions is somethink that is unfortunatly part of everyday life.

So anger can totally be a part of a discusion here. So their can be some reactions and post, were as men you think: That was to far. (I will say those postings are very rare, but be propared that could happen)

Now the times are far from great, for women in the USA even more so, so male poster need some empathy for the female posters.

And some last point exspecially to j:

You are posting on an anonymous site. People here don’t know you. Missunderstandings will happen, that is the joy of the internet. Don’t take them to personal.

I am not an expert on Gamersgate either, but to know of their existance and of some of their tactics towards their targets (which are mostly women) is somethink that nearly everyone knows.

Valkyrine
Valkyrine
3 years ago

Surplus to Requirements, Observer of the Vast Blight-Wing Enstupidation
Surplus to Requirements, Observer of the Vast Blight-Wing Enstupidation
3 years ago

@Valkyrine:

I assume you didn’t intend to post a blank comment. So, something went wrong (probably related to all the delays and stale-cache issues we’ve been having for weeks now) and most likely it needs to be reposted.

Valkyrine
Valkyrine
3 years ago

*Sigh* yeah, was trying to post a video, just not quite sure how it works…

Tovius
Tovius
3 years ago

@Valkyrine
Just paste the url on its own line. The site will do the rest. Usually

Valkyrine
Valkyrine
3 years ago

@Tovius like this?
https://youtu.be/B_WwBQzHLjA

Who?
Who?
3 years ago

It worked, funny vid.

Valkyrine
Valkyrine
3 years ago

Yeah, but just a link. How do you do that thing where the video is on the comment?

j
j
3 years ago

Well it’s not that

kupo
kupo
3 years ago

It has to be the full YouTube link starting with http://www (not https) instead of the shortened youtu.be style link.

Like this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mERUGHzws9A&w=560&h=315%5D

To get this:

(Fingers crossed it works the first time or I get an edit button ?)

Edit: didn’t work but not sure why. Sorry. 🙁

Who?
Who?
3 years ago

kupo: It works for me.

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