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Friday Night Cat Hat Open Thread

Pussy hat, deluxe model

Hey, how about a nice Friday night non-Trump open thread for not talking about Trump? TA DA. No trolls, Trump fans, etc.

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weirwoodtreehugger: chief manatee
weirwoodtreehugger: chief manatee
5 years ago

Rugbyogi,
Sorry about your ex. He’ll probably never change, but hopefully, the older your son gets, the less you’ll have to see him.

I have my grandmother’s china. It’s from occupied Japan. Almost the whole set is intact too. Only one serving boat has a broken piece. It’s probably worth decent money. Not that I would ever sell it. I feel like it should be used. But I’m afraid to. Plus, I never really have people over.

Flora
Flora
5 years ago

Thanks to everyone for your kind words. My friends are able to say all the right things, but you are all right in saying that it’s impossible to understand until you’ve experienced it. Hearing your stories is a healing balm. Everyone’s words are so appreciated. I know I don’t need anybody’s permission to grieve but it really helps to hear it anyway.

I’ve pulled back from stuff at work and dropped what I could. Leave isn’t completely out of the question, but I find joy in my work. It’s not the healthiest coping mechanism, but I’m not doing anything apart from the mandatory stuff so I don’t work myself to the bone, just enough to give me purpose and meaning.

@Ledasmom, I’m sure there’s nothing retained. I would have had symptoms by now and I have been hawkeyed for them. D&Cs aren’t fun, I was fortunate for everything to pass quickly and intact. I have enough psychological horror from passing the gestational sac, I can’t imagine how much worse it would have been to pass it in pieces.

@Gallivant, I’m high risk for an ectopic, and that is part of my fear about another pregnancy. I was so relieved when the ultrasound showed a pregnancy that was both single and intrauterine. Going back to the beginning means fighting those odds all over again, in addition to the infertilty ones. It’s a tough call, and I don’t have stepchildren, but we do have a bunch of pets, so that’s also good enough for me if that’s what happens.

@mildlymagnificent, your words moved me so much. I’ve tried many things as distractions, lots of intentional self-care, but it’s been a flotation device more than a rescue. As my psychologist reminded me, often the only way out is through, so here I am. I’m not okay, but I will be okay.

Faerie Bard
Faerie Bard
5 years ago

Flora, I’m sorry for your loss. I hope you find ways to work through the grief. I have PCOS too, it sucks.

——

I have been dealing with car repairs the last couple days, fortunately not something too expensive this time. I’m also starting to get the spring gardening bug, and am in planning mode for an herb garden and some raised garden beds for raspberry bushes.

guest
guest
5 years ago

What an excuse not to get out of bed this morning…We Love Economic History, part 2 of 3:

http://weloveeconomichistory.blogspot.co.uk/

eli, I’m interested in your project; are you happy to share any details? I specialise in English history, but I know lots of people are working on social networks now all over the world–am trying to remember the person who’s writing about jewellery making in Italy so I can mention to someone else, but am too lazy to trawl back through the issues of Business History to find the review….

rugbyyogi
rugbyyogi
5 years ago

@weirwoodtreehugger

There are two ways to enjoy beautiful China. One is to eat off it and the other is to look at it. I have some dishes from Finland that I almost never use, but they’re on display.

The Wedgwood stuff that I bought has no embellishments, so it goes nicely through the dishwasher and I paid so little for it for the number of plates I got that I actually don’t stress about it. I like it, but I have about 20 dinner plates. To put it in perspective, you can pay almost as much per plate for the really nice disposable stuff. It’s much harder to use the sentimental and irreplaceable on a regular basis.

Ledasmom
Ledasmom
5 years ago

Flora: Ah, good. Sorry to be a noodge about it, but literally the only symptom I had was prolonged bleeding – not even very much at a time – for several months, and then not being able to go for a walk without having to sit down for a while after. I was lucky enough not to pass anything recognizable. Big sympathies there.
I do not know if anyone else finds this amusing, but back when it happened, I had to cancel dental work because I was having an urgent D&C done. It seemed to me that, in a better-organized world, the dental could have been taken care of while I was out. I hate having hands in my mouth.

eli
eli
5 years ago

@guest

I’ll pop over soonish and share more. I was going on long enough about it and needed to settle down and try to get a little rest for today. Today’s my big work day. My energy after is always hard to predict, so it may or may not be today.

opposablethumbs
opposablethumbs
5 years ago

I hope you don’t mind, but this is one of the very few places where you’ll understand why I’m so bone-deep-disappointed and probably feeling even more gutted than I should; the richest and most successful (if their emails are to be believed; we haven’t met for years) of my siblings – followed at least in part by the next-most – not only thinks Trump is better than Clinton (yeah, better for whom?), he also turns out to be an anthropogenic-climate-change-denialist. jesus h christ on a bike. These are people I grew up loving, people with access to all the information in the world, just about, and I see them (well, mostly 1, but t’other is right there) spouting clichรฉd right-wing verbiage … it kind of makes me want to cry, tbh. They were different once.
Oh, and of course they also think anyone who thinks otherwise is stupid/naive/living in a bubble etc. etc. etc., which is always nice. They are smart, you see, and have degrees, money etc. to prove it.
I know a lot of you have been there :-s
(The other siblings disagree, I’m glad to see at least, and quelle coรฏncidence they are the ones with the more relevant scientific background.)

Totally utterly and completely OT and trivial: do any Brits here happen to be following the fluffy history-and-food prog. that is (afaik – I confess I’ve never seen it yet) “Back in time (for Dinner)” on BBC2? (a modern family is “transported” to different periods of history; they exclaim in amazement at period food and quaint household technology). Spawn#2 (completely anonymous and invisible of course) one of the bunch who did the background music for next ep tomorrow ๐Ÿ™‚
Not a big deal (not even a small one, in fact!) but I’m clutching at straws of cheer so I’ll take what I can get right now :-s

guest
guest
5 years ago

@opposablethumbs I don’t know if it helps any to think of it this way, but I’ve come to understand that falling for ‘Trumpism’ is like getting caught in an abusive relationship–it can happen to anyone, smart or not, successful or not, and we’re fooling ourselves if we think these things make us immune, as abusers are very very good at manipulating and isolating. It was only dumb luck that kept me, for example, out of the hands of an abuser I used to know–to this day I wonder how I managed to escape.

opposablethumbs
opposablethumbs
5 years ago

@guest, I certainly agree that “smart” is not necessarily any defence at all against abusive dynamics. Sometimes if anything it can lull you into a false sense of security precisely because you think it can’t happen to smart people, even. (I don’t know if that plays in sibling’s case, though :-s )

I’m very glad you had that luck, regardless of whether or not it was really ‘only dumb’

Thank you for linking to the excellent post on Adam Smith! I had no idea that his elevation to ultimate authority by the extreme right was so mired in misconceptions.

Rhuu
Rhuu
5 years ago

@guest: i’m idly working on some world building right now, and your example of cloth production really made me think about how things could be produced within what is basically a ‘web’ of interconnected businesses.

There is something somewhat similar in vfx production, i believe. Studios can specialise in very specific things, with multiple studios doing different things. (I’m only adjacent to the field, so i don’t have any specific examples but from what i understand) studio a does cloth simulation, studio b does water etc.

The difference is that instead of a chain as you described, with a product going through different stages of completion, it is coming from the same employer that it will eventually go to.

So, in fact, nothing like what you described. This situation is more like hiring specialists! Hmmmmm.

(If i hadn’t labouriously typed this out on my phone, i probably wouldn’t post it, since now i feel silly. 6___9)

I did try to reply on your blog, but my phone won’t open up the reply thing. :C

Also i enjoyed your second post! Might i suggest condensing your discussion with Alan and adding it? As well as your ‘part 1’.

I might have been unreasonably excited when you mentioned me.

Oh! What you described with the rich person wanting to convince everyone that they are rich is basically exactly what i understand ‘virtue signalling’ to be. Perhaps the strong belief in applying the concepts of capitalism as explained by Adam Smith is part of the reason they think virtue signalling is a thing. We all want to be rich, right? And if this is how the rich people behave then…

Throw in that whole ‘people who have money are more just than those without’ belief we seem to be caught up in, and you have a nice mess.

Alan Robertshaw
5 years ago

I’m really loving guest‘s teaching. It’s not just that I’m learning so much, it’s finding out that what little I thought I knew was so wrong. I’ve already got some fantastic “Well actually…” material for next time someone brings up some economics talking point. ๐Ÿ™‚

It’s also stimulated so many jumping off points to other issues. It’s like a mental ‘wiki-walk’. The Chesterton stuff has already got me thinking about how PUAs treat women as ‘Ventler’ goods.

(Hope that’s the right word)

guest
guest
5 years ago

OK, just watched Pontypool…uh, thanks? to whoever on here recommended it…. No actually it was good, but I typically don’t watch horror movies so was a little freaked out. Interesting premise.

@Rhuu–good idea, I’ll go scoop up the stuff from the other post and put it on the blogger page, so it’s all in one place. Interesting idea about ‘this is how rich people look/act so I guess I need to do the same if I want people to think I’m rich, and of course I do’–I hadn’t thought of it that way before. It is a kind of twisted version of what Smith is describing, and of ‘virtue signalling’ (which I understand to mean ‘expressing a particular opinion because I want people to think I’m the kind of person who has this opinion, not because I actually have this opinion’).

@Alan Are you thinking of the crabby and eccentric economist Thorstein Veblen?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thorstein_Veblen

Smith was way ahead of him on this…but of course we only remember Smith for being a libertarian mouthpiece, not for his insights into social behaviour ๐Ÿ™

And thanks again for the compliments–I always tell people I don’t teach unless I’m a) paid or b) specifically asked, and then thanked–so thanks, I’m so pleased some of this stuff is resonating with people. I’ll do one more ‘we love economic history’ post, on wtf is up with joint-stock companies and how they destroyed the world, sometime soon.

Alan Robertshaw
5 years ago

@ guest

Are you thinking of the crabby and eccentric economist Thorstein Veblen?

*Reads linked article*

Apparently ‘yes’ ๐Ÿ™‚ (knew it had a ‘V’ in it)

Rhuu’s point about emulating the rich has also got me thinking. Of course it gets very complicated. There is the whole conspicuous consumption thing, as set out by some economist, Veblen I think his name was (nice one Al, think you bluffed your way through that). But the flipside is that whole ‘the rich dress poor and the poor dress rich’ thing and related concepts like ‘shabby chic’ and virtuous austerity. Wonder if it’s related to the ‘new money’ snobbery? And to go off at yet another tangent how ‘genteel’ poverty is acceptable in the upper classes but poor people’s poverty is down to them being lazy.

(just random thoughts for a Sunday afternoon)

guest
guest
5 years ago

@Alan that might be a specifically English (and possibly Silicon Valley, where I’m from) thing–I loved the series Grayson Perry did with the six tapestries he created about class in England (and got to see the actual tapestries last year–I was thrilled)–when he was doing ‘upper class’ I remember he stayed at someone’s stately home, and said something like ‘it’s dusty, worn down, threadbare, inconvenient, faded…but my entire DNA is programmed to love this as a symbol of the upper class’. Interesting point though that the only thing between fawning and censure over the state of a room like that is the class of its owner. That whole attitude hit home for me when I first looked at the place I’m currently living in–it’s run down, with worn stairs, scratched floors, cracked tiles and peeling paint, and my first reaction was ‘oh this is awful, someone hasn’t kept up the place, how can they even show it in this condition’–but of course that is what a house of this ‘stature’ is supposed to look like! I’m so middle class….

Alan Robertshaw
5 years ago

@ guest

*warning for name dropping* ๐Ÿ™‚

I once got to spend a weekend in a real royal residence. Not the big formal ones, this was in a park where they actually lived when not ‘on duty’. What amazed us was how scruffy it was. Battered old couches with loads of mismatched hand knitted cushions, dog hair everywhere and muddy footprints in the hallway. Thing is, it was really comfy and relaxed. You could just kick off your muddy boots and walk around in your socks or slob with your feet up. But we did comment on the contrast with typical ‘Hyacinth Bucket’ (“It’s pronounced Bouquet!”) middle class pretentiousness.

On a completely unrelated topic, your comments about temple money triggered yet more musings. Are you familiar with how the Romans tried to boost the economy after Caligula got assassinated? He’d almost emptied the Treasury and, because he’d executed a lot of wealthy people to nab their cash, people had pretended to be poor so the economy stagnated. The new government did a lot of things that we’d now talk about in terms of ‘confidence’. Very visible public spending, tax breaks for business etc. But they also melted down votive offerings to the temples so they could mint a lot of new coinage. The theological justifications for that are quite amusing.

“So Apollo is like really Hermes, and Hermes is the patron deity of entrepreneurs and they do best in a booming market; so really we’re just doing what he’d have wanted. In fact, this is like honouring him really!”

eli
eli
5 years ago

Spawn#2 (completely anonymous and invisible of course) one of the bunch who did the background music for next ep tomorrow ?
Not a big deal (not even a small one, in fact!) but Iโ€™m clutching at straws of cheer so Iโ€™ll take what I can get right now :-s

AWESOME! Yes, this is a big deal! It’s always so much fun to be a part of something like that ๐Ÿ™‚

@guest

I’ve gotta figure out how to comment at your new place. Does anyone know how to choose which google account I use to comment? One uses my real name, one is my job and one is the silly throw-away. I’d prefer to use the last if I can’t use eli.

nvm. I think I got it. And apparently I have a new blog? lol

eli
eli
5 years ago

No, I don’t have it. It’s not working. Or am I filling a moderation queue with “test” messages?

Moggie
Moggie
5 years ago

My car, 11 September 2005:

http://i.imgur.com/tyoZo31.jpg

Same car, tonight:

http://i.imgur.com/mLEvAf3.jpg

Looking forward to 2 July 2028!

Redsilkphoenix: Jetpack Vixen, Agent of the FemiNest Collective; Keeper of a Hell Toupee
Redsilkphoenix: Jetpack Vixen, Agent of the FemiNest Collective; Keeper of a Hell Toupee
5 years ago

Fast question for the French Mammothers:

There is a French comic I read years ago (like, mid-1980’s) that was about the adventures of a hamster. I recall the drawings done with pen and ink in a realistic style, and the pages having no dialogue in them. They were full-page strips that showed the hamster doing things like pulling a violin from his cheek pouches and playing it, just fun things like that.

I am wanting to say the hamster was named Herman, but that could be the artist’s name instead (a search for a French comic called Herman the Hamster turned up stuff that was done far more recently than the strip I’m thinking of). I would search my local library for the collection to see if they still had it (or search the Internet for a copy myself), but without knowing the name(s) I need, the search would take forever to do.

So, any ideas for what old comic is now demanding I go find it NAO?

guest
guest
5 years ago

@eli I’ve just set the blog comments over there to accept anonymous comments.

cheesynougats
cheesynougats
5 years ago

Well, I finally found out why there are so few game controllers for PC. Apparently there are emulators to use pretty much all console controllers on PC. I’m going to play Killer Instinct tonight. /happyface

Imaginary Petal
Imaginary Petal
5 years ago

I’ve been away for a few days and didn’t see this open thread until now. We have a visitor from the US this week!

Hugs to all who need it, for example Flora and opposablethumbs. Flora, it’s been 1 month. You can grieve a lot longer than 1 month for something like that. ๐Ÿ™

@rugbyyogi

I’ve heard about your ex a few times before, and I fucking hate him. I don’t have any exea of my own worth hating, so I’m just gonna focus on yours if that’s ok.

—–

We’re hanging out at a sports bar tonight, watching the super bowl until 5am or so (?).

opposablethumbs
opposablethumbs
5 years ago

Thank you, eli ๐Ÿ™‚ (I managed to get the broadcast date wrong – it’s tues 7, not tomorrow. It’s just a bit of fluff, but it’s a happy thought!
(especially because I’m still feeling stupidly bereft on realising my pro-Trump sibling must have been someone I don’t know for years, and I just never wanted to see it. I just remembered today, hearing him say years ago that thank goodness his daughter was good-looking, this was the only thing that really mattered for her, so she could get someone to marry her (she was a young teenager at the time) – knowing how much he values “smart”, I really thought he was kidding. I think now that he wasn’t).)
Sorry, I’m havering on again!

Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
5 years ago

@opposablethumbs
I’m not sure I’ve ever experienced the word ‘havering’ outside of the context of the Proclaimers ?

@guest
Just read the blog post. Sweeet! Also, reminds me of a description I came across of youknowwho: A guy jealously uncomfortable in his lack of ‘class’ and without any idea of how to genuinely mimic same. Thus, Eastern European trophy wives, solid gold thrones, and caked on tans. Everything he does is for vanity and in search of validation that will never come. He has always been deeply miserable in everything he does and is. The only thing that could make him less happy than all the power in the world is for it to be taken back from him in humiliation…

Or something like that ๐Ÿ™‚

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