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Gawker successfully trolls idiots with fake men’s site called, wait for it, The Cuck

Not the official logo of The Cuck

Yesterday, as Gawker staffers drowned their sorrows in whatever booze they could get their hands on at a bare-bones farewell party of sorts for the once-mighty, now bankrupt internet media empire, a new site bearing the Gawker brand introduced itself to the world: The Cuck, a “new pop-up bespoke men’s interest site, for men.”

If the timing and the title weren’t enough to clue readers in to the fact that The Cuck was a joke, a quick glance at the official announcement should have convinced all but the dullest readers of this fact:

Sex, dating, clothes, relationships, politics, sex, women—men have opinions about all of these things. And yet, there’s nowhere on the internet where you can go to read them. That changes today. … 

The Cuck is a site dedicated to exploring modern masculinity in all its myriad forms, and over the next few days or until it is apparent that we have not been able to attract a really loaded sponsor (P&G please call us back), you’ll hear from some of the most thoughtful men—and non-men—working in media (Gawker Media, specifically) today.

The first story to go up on the new site? A comically overwrought essay on The Politics of Sitting Down To Pee.

Basically, The Cuck is a dig at New York magazine’s short-lived Beta Male site, which launched and folded earlier this year, with a nod at the idiots on the far right who’ve turned “cuck” into this year’s most embarrassing insult. (Embarrassing, that is, to those who use the insult, not those on the receiving end, who couldn’t care less.)

So, everyone got the joke immediately, right? Well, no.

On Twitter, an assortment of the sort of idiots who think “cuck” is a killer insult proudly announced their gullibility to the world; some of them even managed to work in gratuitous plugs for Donald Trump.

https://twitter.com/jackmb_/status/763715445862109184

https://twitter.com/OboroSensei/status/763600655055486976

https://twitter.com/MrJohnQZombie/status/763598544951533568

https://twitter.com/NickJFuentes/status/763538499492425729

https://twitter.com/FuturistGirl/status/763588287999184896

https://twitter.com/sintheticality/status/763535034015821824

https://twitter.com/JdogFromDaATown/status/763518227208998912

https://twitter.com/NAL6776/status/763510933599686657

https://twitter.com/HesGotAFro/status/763561856636039168

 

https://twitter.com/billnhillsbong/status/763545477409280000

https://twitter.com/MaximumOverhonk/status/763503086367232000

https://twitter.com/KaiserTrigger/status/763500101935312896

https://twitter.com/dreamedofdust/status/763495529854697472

https://twitter.com/Fb1Marissa/status/763492145500155905

https://twitter.com/Sourstin/status/763627287765848065

The Cuck site isn’t all that funny, honestly. The real humor comes from all the idiots who don’t get the joke.

So close, yet so far away.

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JSun
JSun
5 years ago

That’s even stupider. Yet I’m still not putting it past him.

@Sinkable John : Pansy Ass Pinko
My theory was more a throwback to the RNC, in which the republicans constantly argued against the facts that were being thrown at them by claiming “that may be true, but the american people don’t feel it to be true, so we’re going to go with what we/they feel and not what the experts say.”
But honestly I wouldn’t be surprised if he actually used bio-safe spraypaint on himself.

Virgin Mary
Virgin Mary
5 years ago

In the UK there is a new website and phone app for ordering takeaways or booking restaurants online, I had to laugh when I saw this sign up in the window of our local Indian takeaway. Lololol 🙂
Guess it doesn’t mean the same thing to our local Nazis. Yet.
http://home.papa.org.uk/images/members/logo/300/kukd.jpg

Handsome "These Pretzels Suck" Jack (formerly Pandapool)

PS: Melania’s (probably) illegal immigration saga just got twistier. Apparently, her green card was achieved by marriage…and not to Der Drumpf. And no word as to when/if she divorced Hubby of Convenience #1, either. If she didn’t, that makes her a bigamist…and it makes Drumpf a…say it with me, folks…

Technically, if she never divorced or her first husband isn’t dead, her marriage to Trump is completely invalid. I don’t even think any prenuptials count because they were never legally marry.

Run, Melania, run. I believe in you.

Moggie
Moggie
5 years ago

SFHC:

Are those tan lines from a sleep mask? Huh. I thought he used fake tanner.

I think this should explain:

rick
rick
5 years ago

Good lord. So many of them are missing the punchline of this simplistic joke, and yet they claim leftists have low IQ.

Snowberry
Snowberry
5 years ago

No, no, no, it’s completely meta, you see? They’re only pretending to fall for it in order to troll leftists! Because pretending to be stupid makes people misunderestimate them dontcha know. And they’ll leverage that as an advantage to strike back at the gynarchy! Which they know doesn’t really exist, making the whole thing double-mega-satire!

sillybill
sillybill
5 years ago

Bina,

“And no word as to when/if she divorced Hubby of Convenience #1, either. If she didn’t, that makes her a bigamist…and it makes Drumpf a…say it with me, folks…”

I think you’ve got that backwards – hubby number one would be the cuckold.

From wikipedia: “A cuckold is the husband of an adulterous wife. In evolutionary biology, the term is also applied to males who are unwittingly investing parental effort in offspring that are not genetically their own.”

I guess Donny boy would be the cuck-er.

I can’t wait for H of C #1 to be interviewed. Wonder which way he’ll vote November!

Eyes on the Right
5 years ago

The Geppetto-ing was kind of amusing in a weird way.

Eyes on the Right
5 years ago

Also, had “cuck” been an insult when I first made my blog, that’s what I would’ve called it.

EJ (The Other One) - on Holiday

PS: Melania’s (probably) illegal immigration saga just got twistier. Apparently, her green card was achieved by marriage…and not to Der Drumpf. And no word as to when/if she divorced Hubby of Convenience #1, either. If she didn’t, that makes her a bigamist…and it makes Drumpf a…say it with me, folks…

Technically, if she never divorced or her first husband isn’t dead, her marriage to Trump is completely invalid. I don’t even think any prenuptials count because they were never legally marry.

Run, Melania, run. I believe in you.

This is the funniest thing that ever happened. Thank you both so much. I laughed until my significant other interrogated me about it, at which point she laughed too hard to talk.

Buttercup Q. Skullpants
Buttercup Q. Skullpants
5 years ago

Besides being involved in a cucky marriage with a wife whose n-count is > 0, Trump is also a false rape accuser (see: Central Park Five).

He’s starting to look positively Blue Pill!

Bina
5 years ago

Technically, if she never divorced or her first husband isn’t dead, her marriage to Trump is completely invalid. I don’t even think any prenuptials count because they were never legally marry.

Run, Melania, run. I believe in you.

Right? She can do so much better. I’m praying she leaves him…preferably sometime in October, for maximum surprise.

And I hope Hubby of Convenience #1 pops up to say he’s voting Dem in late September or thereabouts.

Mseegz
Mseegz
5 years ago

Just so everyone is aware, the word “sperg” is a pejorative term for autistic people. Started on 4chan and related shitholes, comes from “Asperger.”

I just like being given opportunities to point out anti-autistic slurs when they’re given to me because people don’t know how much 4chan and related shitholes really fucking love to hate autistic people.

Plus, since the parody site was named after another godawful 4chan meme, I might as well explain another one so people who are allies to autistic people can watch out for them.

Steampunked
Steampunked
5 years ago

The forum I was on once – alt.devilbunnies – had a phrase for this. It was called ‘standing near the airport’ – everything keeps flying over your head!

Paradoxical Intention - Mobile
Paradoxical Intention - Mobile
5 years ago

David, I’m getting Trump ads from Taboola. Just thought that you should be aware.

KafkaNoMore
KafkaNoMore
5 years ago

Off Topic

New rape case of entitled white-boy-rapist that avoids prison and gets away with.

https://www.buzzfeed.com/tasneemnashrulla/no-prison-for-entitled-college-student-who-raped-intoxicated?utm_term=.nb1GrZvgq7#.jkpBYmKo02.

Brook Turner syndrome continues.

But hey, rape culture doesn’t exist!

Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
5 years ago

OT, picked the most recent thread, journalism related

Not to harsh anyone’s Olympic buzz, but:
http://www.nbcnews.com/feature/nbc-out/nico-hines-grindr-story-infuriates-lgbtq-community-n628631
TLDR, a reporter at the Daily Beast wrote an expose on the athletes looking to get laid and sorta outed some people (I say “sorta”, cos he didn’t name names. He narrowed some shit down tho). It should be noted that not all participating countries are that progressive on the issue of fuckin rights and whatnot. The yellow shitshow was edited after ‘a number of readers complained’ to try and undo the damage. The internet is forever, so I doubt it did too much good. There’s an Editors Note that reads more like a ‘so sorry that y’all couldn’t understand our journalistic integrity and brilliance. Why can’t you see how devoted to equality we are?’ than anything else. A pretty well written apology I suppose. ‘Left wing’, alt media was a mistake ?

@Kafka
Fuck!

msexceptiontotherule
5 years ago

@Axecalibur

The reporter had better be willing and able to provide host homes in a safe country for those athletes at risk of returning to their nation of origin only to be jailed or otherwise harshly punished.

:/

kupo
kupo
5 years ago

@KafkaNoMore
But won’t someone think of the damage it will do to the poor boy if he has to serve time? (Sarcasm, if that wasn’t obvious)

@Axe
So gross. Why is that even something a “journalist” would write about in the first place?

Zhukov
Zhukov
5 years ago

Left-wing tabloid trash like Gawker and its subsidiaries, Slate, etc. have unironically published articles about men enjoying the open relationships that their wives requested, finding feminism after discovering their wife cheated, and rationalizing sitting down to pee. A website like The Cuck was only the next logical progression. You can’t really call it satire; self-deprecating, almost to the point of self-loathing “humor” seems to be more appropriate.

kupo
kupo
5 years ago

While we’re sharing OT links, two men finally discuss what’s important about the Olympics: whether women athletes should wear makeup to look pretty for the men watching. http://www.refinery29.com/2016/08/119625/fox-news-olympic-beauty-debate

Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
5 years ago

@msexception

The reporter had better be willing and able to provide host homes in a safe country for those athletes at risk of returning to their nation of origin only to be jailed or otherwise harshly punished

They can live with him. And his wife. That he was legally allowed to marry and never wouldn’t have been!

@kupo

So gross. Why is that even something a “journalist” would write about in the first place?

Appropriate use of quotes
I’m thinking he got hit with Progressive Dunning Krueger. PDK mostly shows up in well off white dudes in well off white dude professions as an inability to recognize when one is Not Helping. In this case, the London Editor (the fuck?) of the Beast goes to Rio to cover the Olympics. What to write about? Hmm… Sex! Why not? While he pats himself on the back for eschewing rigid norms of sexual behavior, he neglects to give a passing thought to the people who are actually, coercively stuck in those norms. People complained about the piece? But, but, he staff at the Beast support gay rights. Aaargh!!
Out some people, dox a country, have anything to do with Slate, doesn’t matter. If you’re not ‘right’, it’s alright. Apparently

Sorry for the rant. Imma go stare at the Luke Cage trailers on a loop until I’m better…

Redsilkphoenix
Redsilkphoenix
5 years ago

@Steampunked:

Alt.devilbunnies*! 😀 It’s been forever since I’ve seen anyone mention that old Usenet board! Didn’t think anybody remembered it. Tell me that game survived Usenet’s execution by whoever bought it out, please? It, alt.dragons, and rec.sf.composition (I think that was the how-to-write-sf&f board) all needed to survive somehow, imo.

(And before you ask, no, I never posted there. I was a very very new noob at the time I found that group, and had no idea how to roleplay online back turn. 🙁 )

*The alt.devilbunnies plot, for those wondering, was (IIRC) cute but deadly bunnies trying to take over the world. Their enemies were the Fudds, who tried to stop them. Fun active game, from what I saw of it.

BVH
BVH
5 years ago

@Ohlmann

I suppose a paranoid reactionary world view also explains all the Republicans who thought(past tense? I hope?) Stephen Colbert was really a right wing pundit.

@kupo

whether women athletes should wear makeup to look pretty for the men watching.

This reminds me years back, observing the various women’s gymnastics teams. Without question, the USA team wore the most cosmetics in comparison. I left me with the impression other countries were clearer on the fact they are athletes, not fashion models.

This is part of the reason I’m into powerlifting as opposed to bodybuilding. Those women work hard, but they’re pressured to dope and criticized if they don’t look ‘feminine’ enough for male judges. Powerlifting doesn’t give a shit about that crap; all you have to do is lift the weight.

Ooglyboggles
Ooglyboggles
5 years ago

Oh this is beautiful, not only do I get to see one last sendoff from Gawker with this level of satire, but I also get to taste sweet Delicious irony, Trump, the people who often kept using the term cuck, is by their definition a cuckold.

But seriously I hope his wife and leave him and get away from his, well, everything and the toxic people around him.

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