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The Top 3 Reasons the All-Female Ghostbusters Will Suck, According to Some Dudes Who Hate Women

Yes, there's already a meme.
Yes, there’s already a meme.

Have you heard? The upcoming Ghostbusters reboot will feature women in the lead roles. Men who hate women seem to be taking the news hard.

And nowhere do they seem to be taking it harder than on MGTOW HQ, a forum devoted to men who are “Going Their Own Way” from women by talking about how much they suck online all day every day.

The assembled MGTOWers have not only determined that the movie will suck but have also figured out why.

So here are the Top 3 Reasons the New All-Female Ghostbusters Will Suck According to a Bunch of Guys Who Hate Women:

1) Because women can’t invent things.

As some dude calling himself TheShaman writes:

Obviously its not gonna be a team of women who created the technology to be ghostbusters- women don’t create anything nowadays except thugspawns and epic fails.

2) Because women are a bunch of copycats.

Mongolking explains:

Your movie’s a gimmick because men did it first. …

[H]ow often do women ever take a risk and do something different that was a success?

Everything they celebrate – from getting the vote, to being elected politicians, to becoming clergy, to going to college, to getting on company boards, to winning Nobel prizes – men had not only done first, they created it out of nothing.

So now we have a group of low ambition women wanting to feminise “Ghostbusters”. That’s the very definition of “uninteresting”.

3) Because everyone knows that women are scared of ghosts. And mice.

TheShaman again:

Women are usually the ones screaming ABOUT ghosts- In an already outlandish plot, we’re now expected to suspend our sense of disbelief to the extent that the very segment of the population that is usually victimized BY ghosts is going to “protect us?” Hell, anything to do with ____BUSTING, whether it be rodent busting, bug busting, etc- its done on the whim of a women who is terrified of whatever it is she wants to eradicate!

Unless the proton packs in the new movie are activated by women pissing themselves in fear, I can’t imagine me enjoying anything out of this new movie.

PhilosopherStoned adds:

I’m not going to suspend disbelief and say that a gender that will jump on a chair when they see a mouse will all of a sudden not only fight ghosts, but have the initiative to start a company that does so. For a movie that where guys trap ghosts in machines, an all female crew just does not seem plausible.

So a 100-foot-tall Stay Puft marshmallow man that is an incarnation of a Sumerian god is the epitome of plausibility, but the idea of women actually starting a company is beyond the pale?

H/T — VforVanarchy on Reddit’s GamerGhazi subreddit, who found the meme I used to illustrate this post on Twitter

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Ellesar
7 years ago

Bette Hopper – I think that they believe that there is a ‘natural order’ (this is why conservative religious types and athiests can both be massive sexists), and so if women have not ‘achieved equality’ this proves the natural order of the almighty menz!

I would have thought that at least the atheists would be able to see that religion has been a FANTASTIC tool of oppression for women, and that it is hardly surprising that women have been held back when the most influential books and thinkers for 1000’s of years tell us that we are property, and that we can be hit and raped if our husbands feel like it.

katz
7 years ago

These women are responsible for approximately all my favorite SNL moments.

http://www.hulu.com/watch/144706

http://www.hulu.com/watch/476028

http://www.hulu.com/watch/705074

(Speaking of Ecce Homo…)

http://www.hulu.com/watch/409938

Lori
Lori
7 years ago

First time commenting here but I couldn’t help myself.
Regarding # 2, sounds like someone’s a teensie bit bitter about that biological ability females have for, “making something out of nothing”. Also, this entire post made me literally laugh out loud (LLOL?) and has been promptly shared via social media.

weirwoodtreehugger
7 years ago

I’ll add Margaret Cho, Roseanne, Kathleen Madigan, Carol Liefer, and Judith Gold to the list. I was never a huge Ellen Degeneres fan but she had a very successful stand up career before she was a talk show host.

DL
DL
7 years ago

Jumping on top of a chair screaming as soon as they see a mouse? Have these guys ever interacted with women or do they just base their reality on cartoons?

Bette Hopper
7 years ago

Ellesar – Ah, yes, the “natural order” argument. All part and parcel. If we weren’t meant to be the bosses of you then why would we have bigger muscles and the testosteroniz?

Man: God is a man.
Woman: Says who?
Man: Says me, and this here book that me and some friends wrote. And here’s a punch in your face if you don’t agree.
Woman: Okay, God’s a man.
Man: Thought you’d see the light.

katz
7 years ago

I like Jo Brand and Sandi Toksvig, though I don’t know if they do stand up now.

Oh man, I love them both on QI!

Chronic lurker
Chronic lurker
7 years ago

@Katz
“Maybe thugspawn are tadpoles that beat up the other tadpoles.”
Cannibal tadpoles?! 😀
As a women, I would love to claim responsibility for such a fascinating example of environmental factors determining the expression of phenotypes. I would be like GOD!

Shaenon
7 years ago

How dare women spit upon the memory of Ghostbusters II?

I’ve paid money to see Margaret Cho and Maria Bamford. And other lady standups, but those are the coolest ones who leaped immediately to mind.

Shaenon
7 years ago

Oh, wait, and Janeane Garofalo.

volt
volt
7 years ago

“women don’t create anything nowadays except thugspawns”

Maybe I’m not cut out to be a ghostbuster after all. I just spent the better part of a minute firing my proton pack at TheShaman, when suddenly it dawned on me that he’s not a ghost, he’s just a human dressed in a white robe and hood.

gilshalos
7 years ago

I’ll add Susan Calman to Jo Brand and Sandi Toksvig.

emilygoddess - MOD
emilygoddess - MOD
7 years ago

I have been bitten by a garter snake. It didn’t hurt, but it did happen.

Meanwhile, JD is the least successful troll ever. I probably wouldn’t pay for any standup, but I did see Margaret Cho for free once (she was funny before all the fail). Other women whose standup I find hilarious: Paula Poundstone, Tig Notaro, Wanda Sykes, Ellen Degeneres, Amy Schumer. If we include non-standup comedic chops (I’m not even sure what standup has to do with Ghostbusters, which is a scripted movie): Alison Brie, Melissa McCarthy, Nancy Robertson, Portia Di Rossi, Mindy Kaling, Betty White, Chelsea Peretti, Kristen Schaal…

emilygoddess - MOD
emilygoddess - MOD
7 years ago

And JD’s name reminds me of one of my favorites, who I can’t believe I left off the list: Sarah Chalke.

Policy of Madness
Policy of Madness
7 years ago

Garter snakes are poisonous. They just aren’t very poisonous, and they lack fangs so they have to gnaw at you to get any venom in you. They usually don’t bother with humans because they’re too busy trying to get the hell away from you.

I’ve never been bitten by a snake, and I’ve kept a few in my time, including a Colombian boa constrictor. If you want a really impressive-looking snake but you aren’t interested in being bitten, a ball python is a good choice. Garter snakes are actually more complicated to keep than you’d think, because it’s a challenge to get all necessary nutrients into them with a single food item. Ball pythons eat rodents, which are a complete food.

Ellesar
7 years ago

On the Thugspawn thing: I am from the UK and did not see that as a racist thing, but having read all comments I am in agreement that it was meant that way. BUT… ALL women create is ‘thugspawn’?! Whether racist or not clearly not all women are having the babies of violent men with criminal proclivities! The sweeping statements and clear divorces from reality on this post have been extraordinary – ghost victimise women and women jump on chairs when they see mice because it showed that on Tom and Jerry?!

I think that the topic must have been hacked by aliens as clearly there is no concept at all there of what human women are actually like.

BTW the term thug actually originates in India (Thugee) – they were a murderous sect who worshipped Kali.

ktrantingredhead
7 years ago

I kind of think it’s going to suck too but that’s because I’m so tired of people just rebooting shit. Write some new guy did movies you lazy bastards? Nah….people get tired of remakes so now we have to reboot swear we make the same movie over and over again but this time because women and then the next time it has black people and then the next time it has ferrets. Bah!

Miss Andry
7 years ago

@Ellesar

Yeah over here “thug” is basically a racist dog whistle that white folks use.

Miss Diketon
Miss Diketon
7 years ago

I just read that Paul Feig (the creator of one of my favorite shows Freaks and Geeks btw) wants Peter Dinklage to play the villain. That adds another level of awesome to the casting.

http://i1.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/facebook/000/264/200/acb.jpg

Leisha Young
Leisha Young
7 years ago

I really do have to laugh when these douche canoes say things like “men are the ones who invented everything/created everything/fought the wars yadda, yadda, yadda”. What they almost always fail to realise is that the reason men did all of those things is because they systematically and physically barred women from doing them! Women didn’t assume a passive, thankless existence by choice.

To make matters worse, it is a direct act of misogyny that lead to the very important historical milestones that women WERE responsible for being largely ignored by the history books…because they were written by men!

andiexist
andiexist
7 years ago

While I certainly don’t want to exorcise them, I am most certainly not afraid of the various ghost cats that decided my house was a good place. Slightly unnerved, yes. But only when one of my corporeal cats starts batting and yowling at a ghost cat.

Siamese would make terrible Ghostbusters.

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
7 years ago

So, I know my comedians solely from QI, but all the women they have on are great except for a few who’ve been on like, twice? Katz, help me out here, who’s the one with the short brown hair who goes all celebrating when she gets then kakxon? Cuz she’s awesome and I can’t believe I forgot her name!

Favorite though? Sorry, but that one goes to a dude — Ross Noble, cuz respect the ability to go on three tangents!

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
7 years ago

Sue Perkins, that’s her name! If she does stand-up, then I’d totally pay to see that.

BigMomma
7 years ago

I saw Sue Perkins many years ago, I even heckled from the audience and she laughed.

BigMomma
7 years ago

I should add, she was great and I was in awe of her. She was touring with her pal, Mel after being on TV with Light Lunch.

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