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Today in Imaginary Feminism: The Slap Circle of Misandry

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 Over on the Men’s Rights subreddit, the neverending struggle against imaginary feminists continues apace. Today, one brand-new Redditor, a self-described former feminist, won himself several dozen upvotes from the regulars by bringing them a literally unbelievable tale of his adventures with a coven of slap-happy feminists.

I stopped calling myself a feminist a few years ago when I went to a meeting and was told “men are inly allowed in this safe space if they participate in a slap circle.”

The idea was that it would be harder for me to intimidate with my six foot stature if all the women had a chance to slap me in the face. I left.

Another guy actually did it.

It’s all true. I WAS THAT GUY.

BUT WHO WAS PHONE?

Actually, no. If this dude’s story is true, I will literally eat my cats.

While most of the Men’s Rightsers commenting in the thread seem to have swallowed this story whole, “slap circles” aren’t actually a thing in feminism.

They are a thing, though, amongst bored and/or drunk young men (and sometimes women) around the world, as countless videos on YouTube can attest.

As as site called Hungry Teen explains, a “Slap Circle” is

A great way to bond with friends, release aggression and stimulate the face. The Slap Circle is a game made for the more hardcore, daring person and can be used as a test for finding the manliest of the group. Although adopting female fighting techniques, the slap circle appeals far more to men. Nothing is required for this game, other than a hand, a face and a set of balls.

All you do, is stand in a circle and slap the person to your right in the face, while waiting for a slap from the person on your left. If you’ve had enough, you step out of the circle and the last two standing fight it out for the winner.

I eagerly await stories in the Men’s Rights subreddit detailing Andrea Dworkin’s demand that all men and boys be forced to take the Cinnamon Challenge and all those insidious mandatory nut shot seminars being forced upon all college students unfortunate enough to be born with a pair of balls.

Thanks to Cloudiah for the heads up, and the good people of the AgainstMensRights subreddit for the Hungry Teen quote.

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girlscientist
girlscientist
8 years ago

I think the time has come for us to make up outlandish stories about the MRA, spread these stories all over the internet and confront every MRA about them whenver they show up somewhere so that they go nuts trying to debunk them. Like… a scientific study showed that self-proclaimed MRAs believe in the Easter Bunny well into their teens (Warren Farrell’s wife still puts on a bunny costume every Easter because telling her husband the truth about where chocolates come from would kill him). Or… there is a direct correlation between supporting men’s rights and excessive flatulence.

racnad
racnad
8 years ago

I’ve never heard of slap circles in feminism either, but if this is something that bored and/or drunk young men (and sometimes women) sometimes so, then it’s entirely possible that a drunk and bored group of women identifying as feminists asked him to do this. If be nervous if I were one of your cats right now.

talacaris
talacaris
8 years ago

What? No walking wethershin while drinking menstrual fluids and bowing down thrice before the Moon. Just a slap circle is not believable, maybe if it were whipping with nettles for an extended time after being bound in the wilderness or something like that

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
8 years ago

As long as we don’t have to do the skyclad dancing thing, it’s not warm enough yet, and also there’s poison oak.

magnesium
magnesium
8 years ago

Slap circle? They stand in a circle… and slap each other… for fun? Stimulate the face? Wut? These youths need more homework; they have too much time on their hands.

But seriously, that MR poster will be severely punished by the Feminist Secret Police for revealing the secrets of the inner sanctum of the slap circle. First rule about feminist slap circle: don’t talk about feminist slap circle.

weirwoodtreehugger
8 years ago

Maybe a troll will read our cock scrunchie discussion in the other thread and tell all his fellow misogynists that feminists won’t let cis men hang out with us unless they agree to wear cock scrunchies.

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
8 years ago

And also the cock scrunchies are made of barbed wire and covered in bees, because misandry.

Tired Texan
8 years ago

They create illusions regarding women in order to mask the reality they create for women.

LBT
LBT
8 years ago

My husband would totally wear a cock scrunchy, he wants you to know.

But then, he also would cockjazzle, so you know, take it with a grain of salt.

(Also, my writeathon not only opens tomorrow, but hubby will be marching in the Pride parade with his church! He plans to wear pink and orange hot pants. It will be glorious.)

bunnybunny
bunnybunny
8 years ago

I like how someone actually commented, “The part about the slap circle is something straight out of a Portlandia skit.” and yet still did not come to the logical conclusion that there might be something at all fictitious about it…

hellkell
hellkell
8 years ago

A slap circle sounds like something the MRM would do, it’s right out of the Three Stooges.

LBT
LBT
8 years ago

“I’m tryin’a think, but nuttin happens!”

LBT
LBT
8 years ago

Seriously, what doofuses. Every time some dumbass dudebro comes up with a stupid idea, they blame it on feminism. I’m sure they’ll blame the LA transit system on us next…

lightcastle
lightcastle
8 years ago

Orthorexia isn’t in the DSM-5, no.

Lea
Lea
8 years ago

magnesium ,
That game is fairly tame compared to the “games” my brother and his friends would play. They’d “play” boxing. That game appeared to be played by letting my brother punch the crap out of everyone else and then laughing about it. I never got their enjoyment of that “game”, but these where boys who would see who could pee the longest on an electric fence. They’re version of fun was …different.
My dad and his brothers used to throw lit fireworks at each other for kicks. (That actually did look like fun, especially the pipe bomb duels.) They caught the hay loft on fire once, but nobody ever got seriously injured. “Playing” with fireworks like that was actually a 4th of July tradition for some male friends of mine. My husband took part in it one year and said he had fun. Whatever floats your boat, I guess.

Nequam
Nequam
8 years ago

And also the cock scrunchies are made of barbed wire and covered in bees, because misandry.

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-1GadTfGFvU&w=560&h=315%5D

Nequam
Nequam
8 years ago

Dammit, how do you inline video here?

hellkell
hellkell
8 years ago

Nequam: Just drop the youtube link, no need for brackets or anything else.

Nequam
Nequam
8 years ago

Thanks, hellkell. Alas, can’t go back and edit my old post. Let’s try this instead:

http://comicsmedia.ign.com/comics/image/article/117/1172370/the-worst-comic-book-events-20110614115511674.jpg

Nequam
Nequam
8 years ago

Welp, apparently it don’t work that way for images. 😛

weirwoodtreehugger
8 years ago

Is Rancid implying that we might abuse our cats now?

Like we would risk the cat anger consequences.

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
8 years ago

I think image embedding might be disabled so that trolls can’t leave gruesome images when they’re in a tetch and trying to upset people.

Chaos-Engineer
Chaos-Engineer
8 years ago

The next sentence of the article is this:

I frankly didn’t care until I saw the backlash against #notallmen, where upon I realized that this is the argument I was using to excuse feminists unlike those violence mongers I had known. I had been saying #notallfeminists, and they all agreed. If ‘not all men’ wasn’t a reasonable thing to say, then could ‘not all feminists’ be?

I’m trying to figure what parallel he’s seeing. Is he making an allusion to “Schrodinger’s Feminist Slap Circle”?

“Whenever I meet a group of feminists, I have to consider the possibility that they might ask me to participate in a voluntary slap circle. And every time I try to start a discussion of the problem, people butt in with, ‘not all feminists are like that.’ It’s not helpful and they’re only saying it to derail the conversation.”

cassandrakitty
cassandrakitty
8 years ago

Our cats or David’s cats, who knows? In any case, I’m pretty sure all of those cats (and other assorted furrinati) have happier lives than Rancid does.

deniseeliza
deniseeliza
8 years ago

Except in the story it was entirely for making the women feel more comfortable, and it was apparently their initiation or something, not just some pastime for when they got bored.

I am 100% confident that if anything even remotely resembling this story actually happened, this guy is either exaggerating greatly or deliberately misinterpreting something.

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