By David Futrelle
Add “marital rape” to the long list of things that incels don’t — or won’t — understand.
Yesterday, a prolific Incels.co commenter called Vermilioncore offered his take on this issue that directly affects roughly zero percent of all incels.
Lots of women claim that they are raped by their husbands but that’s just not possible.
Not a promising start.
How are you going to be raped by the man you are supposed to be fucking 24/7?
I often wonder if particular incels have ever even spoken to a woman they’re not related to; in this case I wonder if Vermilioncore has ever met a married person.
It’s impossible for a wife to be raped by her husband. He has permission to have sex with her because they are married. Even if she’s sleeping, she shouldn’t get mad if her husband starts fucking her in the middle of the night.
Somehow I can’t imagine Vermilioncore being too happy if someone penetrated him while he was sleeping, even if he were married to them.
A woman getting angry because her husband “””raped””” her is like a dog getting mad that its owner pet him.
I’m pretty sure even dogs wouldn’t agree with him on this one.
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My dog gets mad if I pet her when she doesn’t want to be petted. I think most dogs do. And when she does, I stop petting, as one should.
Anyway, incels don’t want marital rape to be a crime because they want enforced monogamy forced upon women to marry them, then they want to rape those women.
Yet another reason I can’t feel sorry for incels: because if they ever do get relationships they will be abusive shitheads.
@Naglfar beat me to it. This person hasn’t learned how to interact with humans or pets, it seems.
Even when he’s at work?
Isn’t she supposed to be at home in dumbshit’s little derptopia?
Ignorant fuckstains gotta ignorant, I guess….
Fucking 24/7 sounds horrifying for all involved, like an x-rated version of the “red shoes” fairy tale.
Co-signing what Naglfar and kupo have said.
And yeah, that’s “red shoes” territory, Moggie. Sex is great. But you need to take breaks to eat, drink, shower, and OH YEAH let your neuromuscular system recover!
I’m going to refrain from getting too deep into TMI, but trust me. You CAN have sex too frequently, and it’s no fun.
holy crap.
These guys shouldn’t be able to own pets, let alone be entitled to a sexual partner
There was a new to me term in that thread; one mentioned something about “IT”s being triggered by it, and then the one sane-ish poster who tried to explain that any spouse can be raped, was labled an “IT”
Does anyone know what that is supposed to mean? I would imagine it might refer to, ”InTelligent enough to see through our crap” , but I that level of self- awareness would be way beyond the incel community
@Hexum7
IT = IncelTears, a subreddit that mocks incels. Calling someone an IT is accusing them of being a poster on that subreddit (or someone who holds the same anti-incel views, like those of us on this blog). So basically you’re right. 😉
Never had a dog.
But with cats you learn pretty fast what the signs for no more petting are.
Cause cat will scratch and bite you if you don’t stop when it has enough.
And anyway. I wonder what the shit for brains asshole would say if a partner would penetrate them in their sleep. With a strap on, if need be.
Incels suck. They need professional help to undo their cranio-rectal invasion.
So, I had not heard of “The Red Shoes” before. Look it up, see it’s by Hans Christian Andersen. I guess something grusome happens to a girl. I am correct.
Hans Christian Andersen creeps me out.
And yeah, I would pet my cat until she obviously wanted me to stop. If I continued she would bite me.
I am not surprised they think that marital rape is not a thing. I am pretty sure they believe rape is not a thing.
I think I’m going to decide that incels aren’t a thing.
If only that would actually work…
Brain bleach
@ mothkiller
It’s also a rather good film. But going back to the original HCA tale, it’s about a girl who loved to dance, and who danced herself to death.
Trailer from the movie. Recommended for all who are interested in ballet and stories about when a woman has to choose between professional success and personal happiness.
Fucking hell!
Sorry. I haven’t got anything insightful here. Just that.
So close to fundamentally understanding consent… but no.
Okay, incels. If you’re going to demand the right to rape your wife 24/7, then she has the right to demand that you support her 24/7. It’s only fair. That means three 8-hour work shifts a day, at multiple jobs if necessary, with no sick days or time off (remember, you’re never allowed to be “not in the mood”).
Marriage also grants your wife unlimited 24/7 access to your credit card and bank account, which she will hopefully use to buy a one-way plane ticket to someplace far, far away from you.
(I’m not personally endorsing this arrangement, of course. It’s just that they never follow their own logic to its natural conclusion. They always stop at the place where it benefits them, and them only.)
Ah old timey sexism where marital rape isn’t a valid concept in ye olde Incel Minds.
Some good news for the thread:
I’m only an occasional poster, but some of you will know that I’m trans. I’m a high school teacher, and tomorrow is day one for me to teach as my authentic self. I’m really excited, a little nervous, and I’m *happy*.
I guess this incel hasn’t heard of the refractory period.
@Brandy
Congratulations Brandy! I hope things go well in your career as an openly trans person!
“A woman getting angry because her husband “””raped””” her is like a dog getting mad that its owner pet him.”
So, lemme understand this, the women are dogs in the analogy? A non-human possession, without agency over her own body? The men are the owners in the analogy. Human, with all the power and entitlement to take sex from his wife whenever he wants with no complaint from her.
This incel sounds like an alien who hatched out of a pod fully grown and had never, ever seen an actual het marriage in real life on this planet.
P.S. I don’t consider dogs possessions, they are sweet, adopted family members who we are privileged to share a home with. We don’t have dog at the moment, but I know that my husband has treated his late dogs (RIP Georgia & Savannah) better than this guy would treat a wife.
@Brandy:
Good luck, I hope it goes well!
And lol, one of our now-deceased dogs (RIP) would bite you for petting her, because her hair was really wiry and any petting at all would pull it and hurt her.
Guys who abuse animals are likely to abuse women.
Guys who abuse women are likely to abuse animals.
That’s because these guys are horrible at being human.
@David F.
Fairness has no place in incels’ worldview. I had to say it. For the newbies.
I’m fascinated by this incel’s use of quote marks. Was there a sale on quote marks? With an even deeper discount on backward quote marks?
You are the king of the understatement.
@Brandy
All best wishes on your exciting new adventure.
But! The core of the analogy is right, touching any person (human or otherwise) without their consent is something that you shouldn’t do!
(I teach all of my animals to consent to being petted – I hold out my hand near them and if they lean into it I pet. If they turn away then no pets. Usually this results in them running over for love when I put out a hand. Consent equals happy snuggle fluff friends)
Only an Incel could manage to develop an accurate analogy and draw exactly the wrong conclusion from it.
@Brandy, congratulations! I hope everything goes fantastic.
Congrats and good luck, Brandy!
As for consent, it is true that you don’t have to be an incel to get consent this wrong. Remember the clusterfuck over the sexual assault of that girl from Steubenville, Ohio?
And it’s not even just when talking about others that things go horribly wrong. When I was 20? 21? 22? I was having sex with a partner and she asked me to stop. I did. Then after I told her how great things had felt and that we should do that again sometime, because I had been seriously close to a wonderful orgasm and knew I would enjoy doing that again.
She asked me, “but why didn’t you just keep going then, if you were close to orgasm?”
Me: “Because you said stop.”
She: “But, I mean, you were close, so why did you stop?”
Me: “Uh, because you said stop. I don’t understand.”
It was a really unusual and sad conversation, not least because I had been in her place before, where someone else wanted to keep going and I wanted to stop and … didn’t.
I wish this was limited to incels only.
Congratulations Brandy! I hope your first day is amazing!
And these dinguses somehow still think that it’s their looks that makes women avoid them like the plague…
Can’t imagine why someone wouldn’t want to date or marry a person who thinks that consenting to a relationship also means consenting to everything else at all times. (And you know that incels aren’t just of the opinion that husbands can’t rape their wives. I’d bet they think that boyfriends can’t rape their girlfriends and that men can’t rape their dates.)
@Kat
I also wondered about these quote marks around “””rape”””. There are 3 sets of double-quotes, I think… is it like (((this code))) in some fashion? Is it rape by Jews? Or is it only Jews accusing people of rape? That was the only thing I could relate it to: it seems too intentional to mean nothing and I’ve seen it before on this board before, but forgot to ask what it meant because I was too exhausted by the other mental poison nearby.
How would you even do “air quotes” for that? Not enough fingers.
Best of luck Brandy. What exciting news; thank you for sharing!
As for the OP, I just hope he doesn’t have pets. Dogs make it very clear whether or not they want to be touched, and even clearer if you go ahead and touch them regardless. People like the OP should be aware that touching a dog without its consent can lead to the dog “touching” you back in a similarly non-consensual way. The rest of us wouldn’t want to touch our dogs if they aren’t enjoying it (unless necessary for say medical reasons), because what would be the point? And that, right there, is the difference. As my much wiser namesake says, it’s about treating people as things. And that goes for dogs too.
@Big TItty Demon, @Moggie
And here I thought those extra (sometimes backward) quote marks were like the manospherian ellipses–a whimsically chosen number of punctuation marks.
@Brandy: Congratulations! You’ll be a great example!
I can’t remember whether it was here or on another site, but I did once see someone admit that they used weird punctuation (such as three consecutive commas instead of one) so that their posts would “stand out”. So that might be the reason for the “””quotes”””. It seems inadvisable to me, though. Sure, you’ll get noticed, but only in the same way that you’d get noticed if you wore underpants on your head.
@ moggie
We had a case in London where someone robbed an off-licence whilst wearing a pair of knickers on their head. Not as a mask or anything; just as a hat.
None of the witnesses could describe the guy at all; only the pants.
“Well, did you even notice black or white?”
“The pants?”
“No; the guy!!!”
Maybe the robber had seen that presentation where you have to count the number of basketball passes between a group of people, and don’t notice the person in the gorilla suit who runs across the stage behind them.
If so, they put it to rather effective practical use.
@Moggie @Victorious Parasol
The Red Shoes fairytale is in fact about sex. The girl is told not to put on the red shoes and abstains for a time, but once she has put them on, she cannot ever stop “dancing” in them. The idea here being that once a girl has sex once, there is no going back, she is going to have to continue to put out. In the story, the red shoes follow the girl even after she has her feet chopped off, meaning that once a reputed slut, forever reputed slut.
Hans had a difficult relationship with his own sexuality. It’s why he wrote things like The Little Mermaid and Thumbellina and The Ugly Duckling.
I will sometimes use multiple quotation marks, i’ll own up to that. But i use it to indicate when i would be air quoting furiously.
Like if i were to refer to this jerk as a ””””’gentleman””””’.
I always forget to count how many i put down on the first side, so i try to muscle memory it. They are probably uneven!
I do it more on an IM program than on a message board, i think. Hm.
I think these might be being used in the same fashion, if that helps anyone.
Signed,
Rhuu, maybe an actual illiterati in this case? XD
Re: Brandy – CONGRATS CONGRATS CONGRATS!!!!!
@Rhuu:
*Screams in programmer*
Grimm Brothers: Some of these tales we have collected are quite disturbing.
Hans: Hold my beer!
Congratulations Brandy, I hope all goes well!
On the subject of pets, my guinea pigs have always been very clear about when and where I am allowed to pet them. If they consent to being petted, they will zone out while I stroke their head. If they don’t, they will jerk their heads back and give me a look. And if I try to pet them somewhere inappropriate (such as their beautiful fluffy chests) I get nipped.
@dashapants
IIRC Anderson himself was sort of an incel, as it seems he was unable to find a partner at any point and never really moved on from his childhood crush.
@moregeekthan
That was kind of my thought when I decided to reread some of the original version of fairytales. Those stories are usually really creepy, and I would never read them to a child.
Even the saccharine Disney happy ending versions are really messed up, due to obvious racism, sexism, and homophobia in most of them.
If air quotes negate the word they surround, do multiple air quotes act like a double negative?
More evidence of their fundamental desire being control and dominance over a woman rather than simple sexual relations.
Frikken incels.
On lighter news, anybody else jazzed for Guillermo Del Toro’s Scary Stories movie? 😀
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vlya92LZqZw
Me and my brother loooooved these books when we were kids. Could recite the best lines from memory and the illustrations were just grotesque enough to entrance you. My brother and a friend of his even made their own home-video version of “The Bad News.”
At worst, this movie will merely disappoint. Still, it’ll be cool to see Stephen Gammell’s illustrated terrors on the big screen. If anybody can do it, it’s Guillermo.
I’m gonna try to check it out this weekend after I get a gyro at Taste of the Danforth.
I wonder if this incel would make an exception for a woman I knew who was a medical resident, working 130 hours/week, mostly in 36-hour shifts?
Her husband did her the courtesy of waking her up first when he wanted to have sex, instead of just raping her, but she had to explain to him that, since she only got any sleep every other night, he shouldn’t do that.
He was that clueless. But he did say OK, and stopped waking her up. I guess that’s the best women can hope for?
@Garnetstar
36 hour shifts? That sounds rough. I’ve only stayed up 36 hours straight a few times (mostly when traveling), but the few times I did I felt awful for days after. Not sure how someone survives doing that on the regular.
I read somewhere that after 18 hours, someone’s judgement is as impaired as it would be if they had a BAC of 0.05. Not sure about 36, but it can’t be good.
O/T: The creepiest and most sexist movie reviews ever. Read ’em and weep. Or puke. Possibly both.
@Naglfar
It’s basically a kind of institutionalized hazing. It’s a terrible, terrible policy and should be ended immediately for the good of caregivers and patients alike, but it won’t be anytime soon because of attitudes about the virtues of overwork.
Another O/T item: remember some years back there was a minor brouhaha in the media about some guy distributing design files online that would allow someone to run off a gun on a 3D printer (for some value of “gun” anyway; the single-shot device was probably as lethal to the person using it as to their putative target)? The guy behind it is up on charges of sexual assault of a minor. Seriously, what is it with these libertarian types and their predilection for underage sexual partners??