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Incels: The Powerpoint challenge

It occurred to me, while browsing around Incels.is earlier today, that a lot of incel posts would be a little less depressing to contemplate if they took the form of powerpoint presentations.

Here’s a post from today, in which an incel calling himself Subhuman Niceguy attempts, in his way, to explain “What have been the benefits of the Sexual Revolution.” You’ll have to forgive his antisemitism, his mentions of suicide, and a reference to the so-called dogpill; he’s an incel.

*Kikes get rich, because the nuclear family has been destroyed, everyone needs an apartment to live in.

*Cops get rich, because little delinquent children join gangs because their dads are losers.

*Doctors and therapist get rich, lots of suicide attempts and people needing shrinks to talk to.

*Pet shops get rich, because people need dogs to fuck.

*Bars get rich, “might as well get drunk – nobody likes me”.

*Mortuaries get rich, because suicide seems like the only option left.

Wouldn’t it be a little more tolerable if the commenter had turned all his bullet points into powerpoint slides?

Hence the Incel Powerpoint Challenge: Take the weirdest of incel comments and concepts — like the one above, or one that you might find in the archives here — and turn them into terrible powerpoint slides.

I sort of got started with the graphic at the top of this post, but I know you can do it better than that.

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Lollypop
Lollypop
6 months ago

@The Dark Avenger

If people handed out kittens at my local supermarket I’d have a houseful. And would swiftly be evicted, so perhaps it’s for the best that isn’t an option!

@MV96

Ah that’s interesting. It looks like loads of the new fashionable hybrid breeds aren’t recognised.

@full metal ox

Completely agree. I always think of Hogarth’s painting of his pug. That looks like a dog that can breathe, unlike the purebred modern ones people spend thousands of pounds on.

Allandrel
Allandrel
6 months ago

@Full Metal Ox

Poor Vantablack is SO well-behaved there, but she clearly does NOT like having her ears bound.

Malintzin
Malintzin
6 months ago

Why do these dreadful people have to bring pets into the discussion? I love dogs, cats and birds. (Though I have a distinct preference for cats). I have a sweet little gray and orange kitten who bites my hands, devours all the food I give her, purrs like crazy when I pet her, and sleeps cuddled up with me all night and puts her little paws over my hands so we are literally holding hands. Please stay away, incels!

GSS ex-noob
GSS ex-noob
6 months ago

PowerPoint has never improved anything. It only makes things worse, even if they were good to begin with.

Nobody I know has bought a dog or cat in forever. The shelters and rescues are full of them for a very small adoption fee. Mutts are best. The cat who is currently whining at me for dinner was born in my backyard before the lady down the street finally managed to wrangle the alpha tomcat to get fixed and I trapped a bunch of them and took them to the shelter. We had a couple litters of kittens a year on the block for a bit. Probably not helped by the stereotypical old lady cat hoarder a few blocks away, but the cops and animal control finally dealt with that about the same time.

Many, but not all, people are better about getting their pets fixed nowadays. Shelters and rescues don’t let you have an animal till it’s fixed. It’s been years since I saw people at a store with a box of puppies or kittens. Vets get a lot of them dumped on their doorstep. You’re not allowed to sell animals from breeders in pet stores in California and a few other states, and some cities. A lot of chains have stopped selling warm-blooded critters. Even more places say no selling of dogs, cats, or rabbits. Fishies still ok.

@Alan: I love that cartoon! Especially panel #3.

@FM Ox: I used to know a lovely police dog. He was a Belgian Malinois (Belgian Shepherd, so a lot like German). So smart, and so sweet, and so tough when out grabbing guys who’d get out of reach of the police. He looked and sounded like an epic guardian when attacking, but off the leash he was a big ol’ goofy puppy. Very protective of his handler’s kids. He, naturally, wasn’t from a puppy mill and bred to show dog standards — he was from a supplier and trainer of police dogs. 10/10, would pet doggo again.

The problem with purebreds (dogs, cats, horses, people) is that their family tree don’t fork. Ruh-roh.

Elaine The Witch
Elaine The Witch
6 months ago

I talked about that my dog is named sandy after the orphan annie dog sandy. Because I was in Annie when I was a little girl at a local theater. Once, I talked about it once on tumblr with someone and now google will not stop giving me ads about “annie live” on nbc.

Ninja Socialist
Ninja Socialist
6 months ago

I was reading earlier about a cop who was arrested for sexually abusing his K9 partner and filming it. He also had child porn. If incels had any brains they’d realize it’s mainly men participating in beastality.

Elaine The Witch
Elaine The Witch
6 months ago

@Ninja

I’m willing to bet most cases of bestiality are done by a man or at least someone with a penis. This is gonna sound weird but remember I’m friends with a lot of dog breeders. Even with the biggest dogs like mastiffs or great Dane, they have small penises compared to that of a human male penis. And you know. dog Pensis are meant to go inside a dog vagina. they are meant to have sex with those of their own species. they don’t mix. logically wise, for many different reasons then just this one, there is no reason whatsoever for a woman to have sex with a dog when even the “smallest” of human male penises are going to be bigger then a great Dane penis. plus, human pensies, designed to go into human vagina and vice versa.

with domesticated animals the closes thing I can think of that would be closer to the size is a bull or a horse, but those would be to big for a human female vagina. (don’t tell me if some woman has fucked a horse or a bull, I don’t want to know).

That being said, human penis can go into other species vaginas. that doesn’t mean it’s good or that it isn’t going to cause hurt or kill the female animal. or even more so give the human man some weird disease he’s now going to past on to humans (looking at you Christopher Columbus with your syphilis you got from fucking lamas!).

so basically there is a reason for those jokes about goat and sheep fuckers because well, there have been creepy men that fuck a goat or sheep. I wouldn’t be surprised if the whole beasality thing was incels projecting because they all want to fuck ever bitch they see when they go to the dog park or something.

Full Metal Ox
6 months ago

@Allandrel:

Poor Vantablack is SO well-behaved there, but she clearly does NOT like having her ears bound.

The Happy Hoodie (https://happyhoodie.com/usesandbenefits.html) turns out to be the name of an actual product; the rationale behind wrapping the animal’s ears is to muffle unfamiliar and potentially alarming noises that might exacerbate the experience.

Last edited 6 months ago by Full Metal Ox
Alan Robertshaw
6 months ago

@ elaine

looking at you Christopher Columbus with your syphilis you got from fucking lamas!

You got me intrigued! You know how I look for any excuse to bang on about zoonotic diseases.

Apparently though it’s a myth. Not least because it now appears syphilis may have already existed in Europe pre-Columbus.

But you did lead me to some interesting llama related stuff; cheers!

More about llamas
Journal of the European Academy of Dermatology & Venereology, 3 (1994) 97 Elsevier Science B.V. 97 DERVEN 00141 Forgotten theories The origin of syphilis and the llama myth The following is an extract from a presentation at the Seoul International Dermatology Symposium, Seoul, Korea, 8 May 1992. The history of syphilis is rampant with supposition, allegation and downright fabrication. The pre-Columbian theory suggests that human treponematosis originated from an ancient common treponema through genetic manipulation. The Columbian or New World theory states that syphilis was introduced into Europe on the return of Columbus in 1493. To support the New World theory, a story was spread that the llamas in Peru were responsible for spreading a treponematosis to man. These gentle animals were alleged to have difficulty in copulating. Men would assist them in the process, sometimes participating in bestiality [1-3], which has been depicted in the water jars (huacos) of the period [4]. Among the Incas, the fear of infection resulting from bestiality was so strong that Peruvian monarchs inflicted harsh punishments upon those who practised such bestial acts. There was a rule compelling men assisting the mounting to take their wives with them, and assigned the care of female llamas to women only. A man designated to assist the llamas in the mounting (so-called “the man who assist to whelp”) had to be marLawrence Charles Parish 1819 J.F. Kennedy Boulevard Philadelphia PA 19103, USA SSDI 0926-9959(93)E0069-W ried. In addition, in Peru, an ancient law existed which forbid unmarried men to keep female alpacas at home. The people who contracted “huanthi” (the local name for llama infection) through sexual relations with the llamas were considered a source of infection and sentenced to death. Despite such strict measures, llama bestiality frequently resulted in genital lesions on man. These were highly contagious. This theory is apparently incorrect, as the treponematosis affecting llamas is distinct and different from the human form. Moreover, experiments with infecting alpacas with Treponema pallidum have been unsuccessful [5]. Nevertheless, osteoperiostitis has been found in llama bones, there being no difference between that and the same process observed in man [4]. References 1 De napoli F. Sesso e Amore nella vita dell’uome degli altri Animale. Milan, Italy. Fratelli Bocca, 1942:937-938. 2 Jauregui F, Lancelotti L. Hacia la sueroterapia de la sifilis. Sem Med 1925;1:9-15. 3 Ashmead AS. On the question whether pre-Columbian syphilis in America originated by unnatural practices with female llamas. Am J Dermatol 1909;13:453-460. 4 Goldman L. Personal communication, 1992. 5 Fowler M.E. Medicine and Surgery of South American Camelids (Llama, Alpaca, Vicuna, Guanaco). Ames, IO. Iowa State University Press, 1989:128. Vincenzo Ruocco University of Naples Naples Italy

Big Titty Demon
Big Titty Demon
6 months ago

@Alan Robertshaw

Thank you for doing that research so I didn’t have to, because I also was curious if that was the true origin of syphilis.

The fact that those laws existed speaks to some overwhelming problems with animal treatment. It’s right up there with burning cats on Guy Fawkes day.

Alan Robertshaw
6 months ago

@ big titty demon

I’m just in a webinar at the moment. It’s about animals and the law. I’m hoping to find an opportunity to slip in my new found llama law knowledge!

Full Metal Ox
6 months ago

@Big Titty Demon:

The fact that those laws existed speaks to some overwhelming problems with animal treatment. It’s right up there with burning cats on Guy Fawkes day.

See also these ASPCA ads; no actual violence toward animals is depicted, but the reader is invited to do the math:

http://theinspirationroom.com/daily/print/2006/12/aspca_bunny.jpg

http://theinspirationroom.com/daily/print/2006/12/aspca_cat.jpg

http://theinspirationroom.com/daily/print/2006/12/aspca-dog.jpg

GSS ex-noob
GSS ex-noob
6 months ago

@Full Metal Ox: I am always amused at the Olympics to see the fancy horses wearing little hats to keep noises and bugs out of their ears while they’re doing all their fancy stuff. They started out as just plain black, but every year they get more elaborate. This year some of them were bedazzled and had their national flag on them. Gaudiest? You guessed it, U!S!A!

@Alan: I was today old when I first heard that theory. But the fact that there were so many severe laws against it proves ancient Inca dudes were banging llamas. Probably Inca incels.

Kat, ambassador, feminist revolution (in exile)
Kat, ambassador, feminist revolution (in exile)
6 months ago

A man designated to assist the llamas in the mounting (so-called “the man who assist to whelp”) had to be marLawrence Charles Parish 1819 J.F. Kennedy Boulevard Philadelphia PA 19103, USA SSDI 0926-9959(93)E0069-W ried.

It had to be Mr. Parish of Philadelphia, PA? No one else would do?

.45
.45
6 months ago

I will never look at “The Emperor’s New Groove” the same again…

Reaktor
Reaktor
6 months ago

Re: Incas “loving” llamas

Don’t take those stories at face value, the proof is all over the text: “The origin of syphilis and the llama myth“. “The history of syphilis is rampant with supposition, allegation and downright fabrication“. “This theory is apparently incorrect“. I investigated a bit here and there and I can offer specific comments, which I’ll try to keep as brief as possible:

“These gentle animals were alleged to have difficulty in copulating. Men would assist them in the process, sometimes participating in bestiality […] A man designated to assist the llamas in the mounting (so-called “the man who assist to whelp”)”

“Alleged”, indeed. Those old sources actually state the blatantly false fact that a male llama couldn’t penetrate a female on its own due to the angle of its penis, so the organ had to be guided into the vagina by human hands. That “man who assist to whelp“? More like “man who guard and keep two llamas in close quarters, waiting for them to fuck already, don’t be like those damn pandas please”.

[bestiality] which has been depicted in the water jars (huacos) of the period

I couldn’t find any pictures to back that up, instead I just found jars depicting regular llama-on-llama action. But even if those jars existed (missionaries tended to destroy such “sacrilegous” artifacts), there are reasons to believe that many of them were symbolic or represented specific ritual practices that were not a regular occurrence. As an aside, it was much, much more common to find jars depicting humans engaging in non-heteronormative sex (with the same caveats, though before the Spaniards imposed their mores in the Americas many of those were not so stigmatized anyway). In fact, I find it quite likely that the hypocritically prudish Europeans exaggerated the local population’s “depravity” in typical racist fashion, and so the “natives casually banging llamas” thing came about.

There was a rule compelling men assisting the mounting to take their wives with them, and assigned the care of female llamas to women only […] In addition, in Peru, an ancient law existed which forbid unmarried men to keep female alpacas at home.

Not so ancient. Continuing from above, at least some of such laws were actually put in place or influenced by the Spaniards according to their exaggerated beliefs.

The people who contracted “huanthi” (the local name for llama infection) through sexual relations with the llamas were considered a source of infection and sentenced to death.

“Huanthi” wasn’t just a word for “llama infection”, it was a generic term for deceases with syphilis-like symptoms. See above about that death sentence.

Elaine The Witch
Elaine The Witch
6 months ago

@alan

The creators of scooby doo actually did that because they figured a dog that no one wants is exactly the type of dog Shaggy roggers would adopt. because he could relate to that pretty hard.

Scooby doo is something I have… way to much knowledge about because it was has been my special interest/ hyperfixation for a long time,

Full Metal Ox
6 months ago

@Elaine the Witch:

And Casey Kasem was a vegetarian, and insisted that Shaggy be as well, so that detail is canonical.

Nequam
Nequam
6 months ago

@Full Metal Ox: Or rather, once Kasem went vegetarian Shaggy did too. Early shows still have Shaggy eating full omnivore.

Full Metal Ox
6 months ago

@Nequam:

@Full Metal Ox: Or rather, once Kasem went vegetarian Shaggy did too. Early shows still have Shaggy eating full omnivore.

Thank you for the clarification; I grew up watching the show, but can’t count it among my hyperfixations.

(Thoughts on The Thirteen Ghosts of Scooby-Doo? On one hand, it broke the rules of the universe by introducing the genuine supernatural; but on another, it did give us Goth Eco-Activist Coven! Josie and the Pussycats.)

Last edited 6 months ago by Full Metal Ox
GSS ex-noob
GSS ex-noob
6 months ago

But what’s in Scooby Snacks?

Nequam
Nequam
6 months ago

@Ox: On the one hand, Vincent Van Ghoul! On the other, Flim-flam, who may have been even more obnoxious than Scrappy, and with BOTH of them in the same show…!

Redsilkphoenix: Jetpack Vixen, Intergalactic Meani

@Full Metal Ox,

A theory I read on one of the TVTropes Scooby-Doo pages stated that in (some of) the SD universe(s), the supernatural not only exists, but has been proven to exist in there. Because otherwise how would the villian’s plan that boils down to ‘someone dresses as a ghost/monster to chase everyone else away from valuable land/objects’ be taken seriously in-universe by all the other inhabitants (including our heroes) unless ghosts and monsters that everyone is scared of really existed?

Meaning that while the adventures we the viewers see are of the gang revealing the frauds, there are cases we don’t see that the gang reveals as genuine. Which would make for an interesting twist on the usual storylines. Is the mystery of the week yet another fraud, or is it really…a ghost for once?

As for why dogs like the cockapoo aren’t considered breeds by organizations like the American Kennel Society, my understanding is that there has to be some (for lack of a better term) genetic stability in the lines before being counted as a breed. Like, if you breed two cockapoos together, would all the puppies have the same body as the parents or would some look like poodles and others like cocker spaniels? Because that’s a major reason why many designer breeds aren’t counted as ‘true’ breeds: they don’t breed true like how two poodles do. If/when designer breeders put in the time to ‘fix’ the desired physical traits in their dogs so they breed true, their designer dogs won’t be counted as real breeds by the dog show people at least.

At least that’s how I understand that situation anyway; things might have changed since I last read anything about that subject.

Elaine The Witch
Elaine The Witch
6 months ago

@ex-noob

do you want the canonical dog food version of scooby snacks or the made for human consumptions one?

Wem
Wem
6 months ago

PowerPoint presentations are painful enough without adding this as a subject matter

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