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Is heterosexuality gay? A confused Roosh V ponders the question

Yes, his beard is slowly eating his head

By David Futrelle

The newly-minted Christian moralist Roosh V spent many years of his life immersed in a lifestyle that one can only call depraved — using a crude and predatory version of “pickup artistry” that at times seems to have been indistinguishable from rape to “score” with women; he wrote a series of books teaching other men how to do the same.

Now he’s turned his back on his old ways. Not, it seems, because he recognizes the real harm he did to his victims, but because he’s now convinced that “heterosexual fornication,” as he puts it, is too gay.

No, really. In a post on his blog last week, Roosh spelled out his, er, logic.

At a time in my life when I was attacking homosexuals for their degenerate fornication lifestyle, I was participating in a degenerate fornication lifestyle. Outside of the difference that they had sex with men and I had sex with women, our lifestyles, moral outlook, and approach to intimacy were almost identical. I may not have been a homosexual by definition, but I was a homosexual in spirit.

Roosh, in true clickbait style, then lays out 15 reasons that fornicators of the heterosexual variety are acting the same as fornicators of the homosexual variety. And it doesn’t take long to see that the actual behavior of gay men doesn’t really have anything to do with any of this: he’s simply taken his own bad behavior as a pickup artist and projected it onto gays and their, ahem, “doo-doo lifestyle.”

He declares that male “fornicators” use “drugs or alcohol” to “seal the deal” with their would-be conquests.

All potential sexual prospects for the night are plied with drink or pills to get them in a heightened state of lust, and then at the peak moment of attraction, an attempt is made to move to a private bedroom (or bathroom) to complete a sex act. If you’re an active fornicator, I can just about guarantee that you have never slept with a woman for the first time without the aid of a psychoactive substance.

Speak for yourself, you date-rapey creep.

Actually, he has already spoken for himself — specifically, in his book Bang Iceland, where he confessed to having sex with a woman so inebriated that “[i]n America, having sex with her would have been rape, since she couldn’t legally give her consent.”

(Guess what, dude; they have those same laws in Iceland, too. You. Raped. Her.) 

The rest of the post is made up with similar half-confessions, alongside brief rants on things Roosh finds distasteful (anal sex, abortion, personal grooming). Apparently the only form of acceptable sex to Roosh these days is the old-fashioned penis-in-vagina variety. “A human mouth is not a place to put a penis,” he explains at one point.

An anus is not a place to put a penis. Your mouth is not intended to slurp up a vagina or anus. … When you’re addicted to gaining physical pleasure, you have to get creative in vile and disease-causing ways just for a little extra shot of pleasure.

He excoriates both straight and gay men who have sex without condoms, assuming that this is pretty much universal behavior.

The ones who say they “always use condoms” are not being honest, because once you hear details of their sexual encounters, you’ll see that they use condoms only when a woman forces them to, or when one puts out severe warning signs like having a facial tattoo, but even then, many men hope they can fornicate without protection.

Roosh is again assuming that his behavior in his “pickup artist” years — when he was obsessed with “raw dogging” — matches the behavior of all other “fornicators.” (Sadly, it does match most American Fornicators)

Roosh goes on to charge both straight and gay men with having “sex with partners they have no feelings for.” This time he uses an example from his own life rather than simply projecting his experiences onto others.

Many times I would dance like a monkey for a girl I didn’t like, to entertain her and maintain her attraction, just so I can access her hole and have an orgasm. … Through fornication, both gay and straight stop viewing human beings as human, but as vessels to a sex act that is barely more intimate than masturbation, and any means will justify that end.

Well, yes, if you’re a manipulative shithead who insists on having sex with people you hate … there’s a pretty good chance that no one is going to have a good time.

As a new convert to Orthdox Chistianity, Roosh makes sure to mention God and his basement-dwelling friend, denouncing the allegedly “Satanic” consequences of the sexual revolution that gave Roosh his career as a (very bad) writer in the first place.

He ends with this uplifting passage from the Book of Roosh.

A society of homosexual fornicators, flaunting their behavior in public, can’t be achieved without first having a society of heterosexual fornicators. Both go hand in hand to divide and destroy both sexes while preventing the creation of families. More severely, fornication separates you from God and destroys your soul, one casual hook-up at a time. It pains me to think of how deceived I was to partake in this evil for so long.

Dude, it’s actually a good thing that you feel guilty about what you did. But you’re not feeling guilty over the right thing. It’s not (consensual) fornication that’s the problem; it’s the rapes that you so casually confessed to in your dating guides date-rape manuals.

Your God may forgive you for that, but we won’t.

Send tips to dfutrelle at gmail dot com.

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Jenora Feuer
Jenora Feuer
2 years ago

@Naglfar, Battering Lamb:
Back around 1990, Roberta Gregory did a short comic book story called ‘Sleeping with the Enemy’ which involved two relatively quiet bi individuals getting together, both of them having to downplay or hide the relationship from their rather more vocal same-sex-only friends. (Which, of course, was one of the things they had in common.) I think that was the first I learned that discrimination against bisexuality was also a thing from the homosexuality side.

Which, sadly, didn’t surprise me, because people are people.

Policy of Madness
Policy of Madness
2 years ago

I think the constant talk about microbiology was because he didn’t want to seem feminine, and so he had to repeatedly reassure himself it was Manly Man-Science Science Man.

Microbiology has little to do with baking, though. Sure, it’s there, with yeasted products, but there’s a lot more chemistry involved and the microbiology of yeast is pretty simple. You add warm water, sugar, and live yeast, and keep it away from the salt until you’re ready to mix up everything. VOILA. Now, if he were baking with something interesting, something that isn’t your common baker’s yeast … but that is asking too much of someone who can’t be bothered to knead his own dough.

Victorious Parasol
Victorious Parasol
2 years ago

I’m snobbish enough that my only “bread machine” is my KitchenAid stand mixer, but one of my sisters uses a bread machine because with her schedule, she can’t make fresh-baked bread. It’s a shortcut for her. It helps that she has openly envied my bread baking skills. 😉

But as proud as I am of my bread baking skills, I don’t feel the (k)need to call myself a “bread scientist.” I bake bread, with results good enough that my friends ask what KIND of bread I’m bringing to the party, so I’d put up my Old Order Amish bread or my Scottish buttermilk bread or my kolach against Roosh V’s products any day of the week.

Policy of Madness
Policy of Madness
2 years ago

I can’t bake bread at my own home because I don’t have enough counter space to knead the dough (no counter space also means no bread machine). I used to bake every weekend, though, when I lived elsewhere that had lots of counter space; I would make 3 loaves and eat them over the course of the next week, usually making sandwiches out of them. I braided my dough to give it an interesting texture, and once for a couple of months I experimented with sourdough starter. Conclusion: delicious, but not worth the effort.

Naglfar
Naglfar
2 years ago

@PoM

Microbiology has little to do with baking, though.

I know, but the average manospherian doesn’t know or care. It’s just credentialism when Roosh talks about it.

Jesalin, Goddess of Lust & Pleasure
Jesalin, Goddess of Lust & Pleasure
2 years ago

Darn, I’m late but

Happy Birthday VP!

Victorious Parasol
Victorious Parasol
2 years ago

@ Jesalin

You’re not late – you and anybody else who wishes me a happy birthday today are just turning it into a MULTIDAY CELEBRATION.

Naglfar
Naglfar
2 years ago

@Victorious Parasol
So if we keep it up you’ll have a whole birthday year? It seems like we now need to wish everyone a happy birthday each day.

contrapangloss
2 years ago

Belated B-day congratulations, VP!

(I was half tempted to wait for tomorrow to add to the multi day celebration, but I would totally forget so…)

Shadowplay
2 years ago

@VP

Adding my Wishes for Many Happy Returns to your birthday week celebration!

ColeYote
ColeYote
2 years ago

At a time in my life when I was attacking homosexuals for their degenerate fornication lifestyle, I was participating in a degenerate fornication lifestyle. Outside of the difference that they had sex with men and I had sex with women, our lifestyles, moral outlook, and approach to intimacy were almost identical.

Oh, ew, fuck Daryush for implying I’m anything like him, I oughta sue for libel.

Nanny Oggs Bosom
Nanny Oggs Bosom
2 years ago

@VP

Happy belated birthday.

irene
irene
2 years ago

This shift in the manosphere/far-right away from standard misogyny and toward these bizarre anti-sex, anti-pleasure ideas is so fucking weird. It’s like extreme prudish moralism combined with the most regressive imaginable sexual norms. Seems pretty much like the nazi crusade against “sexual bolshevism” and “degenerate art”.

I suppose if I thought this creepy rape shit he does was representative of all sex, I might be against sex too…

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