By David Futrelle
So here’s a strange little screenshot that’s made the rounds online offering, well, a rather curious interpretation of the story of Adan and Eve and that sneaky, sneaky snake.
Think outside the box indeed!
But if the fact that a snake’s mouth looking sort of like a vulva means that women themselves are sneaky snakes, then what should we male of all these other things that also look sort of like a vulva?
Like this tangerine?
This piece of toast?
This jar of peanut butter?
This Georgia O’Keefe painting?
This hairdo?
This grapefruit?
This extremely slutty tree?
Or — and I’m sorry I have to expose you to this — Donald Trump’s neck wattle?
Does this mean that women are peanut-buttery-tangerine-flake-toasty-grapefruit-Trumpian-neck-wattle-hairdo-paintings that live in the forest?
Because if so I may need to totally rethink this blog.
H/T — r/badwomensanatomy, where I found the original screenshot
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@Cat Mara
I can only ask; how did he get soap molds shaped like the genitals of porn stars? Did he make them himself, or can you buy such things?
@Naglfar: I have no idea, though IIRC some porn stars have brought out sex toys moulded after their genitals; I guess he could have used one of them to make a mould for the soap. Or maybe he took impressions from women friends or models who didn’t want their real names used, so he substituted the names of well-known porn stars…
It’s not a grapefruit at all. Grapefruit’s are crossed pomelos and sweet oranges and didn’t exist in the 17th and 18th centuries.
That appears to be a peeled blood orange, which originated in Italy as “Tarocco” in the renaissance period.
Love the various Lucas paintings; I like that he obviously used the same female model for, like, all his paintings.
On the grapefruit controversy: it IS a grapefruit, and I know this for a fact not because I’m a botanical history revisionist but because I photoshopped the vagina-looking grapefruit I used later in the post into the original painting over the original apple. You can see a teensy bit of the apple sticking out on the left near her fingers.
@Cat Mara:
I looked at the 1st Eve & the snake picture you posted and thought “Eve looks like she’s thinking ‘Bitch, please, I will lob this indiscriminate piece of fruit at your head’.”
Would love to have read that in Genesis.