evil old ladies evil ugly women men who should not ever be with women ever MGTOW misogyny

Sally Field and the MGTOW Reality Distortion Field

Sally Field protests
Sally Field protests

People used to say that Steve Jobs had a sort of “reality distortion field” that surrounded him like an aura, that his charisma and enthusiasm were so off the charts that he was able to convince those in his presence (and, quite often, himself) of almost anything.

The people I tend to write about on this blog also seem to live within reality distortion fields of their own making, but instead of seeing the world through Apple-colored glasses they come to believe a lot of stupid and terrible things about women. And in the process, some have become incapable of seeing what is right there before their eyes.

Take, for example, the surreal discussion of the new Sally Field comedy Hello, My Name is Doris that I ran across recently on the MGTOW forums on

The film tells the story of a comically frumpy and awkward older woman (Field) who gets the hots for a charming, handsome and much younger co-worker (Max Greenfield). I haven’t seen the movie, so I have no idea if the two end up together. Or if the movie is any good.

The fellows on haven’t seen the movie either, but they have some pretty strong feelings about it regardless, notably the feeling “eeeeeeeeww!” They’re not only offended and disgusted by the idea of the two getting together; they’re angry that any old lady could even think she could bag a much younger man.

“Well i like older women but this garbage glory hole piece of garbage grand parent slut i wouldnt be able to puncture,” one commenter declares.

“[I]ts not a rom com its a fucking crime against nature, a freakish out growth that exists only after years of gynocidal feminist garbage has poisoned us all,” adds another.

So far this is all pretty standard MGTOW stuff. After all, these are guys who, like so many others in the manosphere, think women “hit the wall” by the age of thirty, if not earlier.

What’s interesting to me is how old they think Sally Field is.

In the post that opens the thread, titled “New fantasy for post-wall women,” a commenter who calls himself Nuggets describes the film thusly:

Romantic comedy with 50-ish woman seducing the 20 something new hire guy at her job. I always find shit like this hilarious. Probably the beginning of a new trend for movies. Bleh

In a followup comment, he adds:

It’s like they’re in total denial that she’s old. They’re trying so hard to present her as an “omg so awkward” 23 year old woman, even though the actress who plays her is 54. That’s exactly how women think though, especially the target demographic for this movie. Picture some grannies going to see this, gives me the creeps mang.

Sally Field is 69 years old, not 54. She played “The Flying Nun” in the 1960s, for god’s sake.

Not only that, but in the film she’s done up in a way that makes her look even older — as you can see from the film’s trailer, which Nuggets helpfully posted to the thread:


Here she is at the film’s premiere, with somewhat better styling:

Sally Field: Not actually a “garbage glory hole piece of garbage grand parent slut.”

For purposes of comparison, here’s another 69-year-old who’s been in the news a lot lately:

Donald Trump: Aging like fine wine?
Donald Trump: Aging like fine wine?

Now, I should point out that several commenters on piped up to set Nuggets straight on Field’s actual age. And, for what it’s worth, Nugget is also off on the age of Sally Field’s movie crush. The actor playing her co-worker isn’t “20 something.” He’s 35.

But Nuggets’ confusion about Field’s age is telling.

Does he think that when women ‘hit the wall,” at whatever arbitrary age he thinks this happens, that they immediately start shrinking down and drying up, transforming from “hot babes” into an army of bitter old crones?

Is he so convinced that “women age like milk,” as misogynists often say, that he simply can’t see all the women who don’t?

Newsflash, MGTOW dudes: lots of men find older women attractive.

In the real world, to be sure, it’s pretty rare for 35-year-old men to date 69-year-old women. But the inverse is also true, and there are plenty of men who are interested in the older women that MGTOWs profess to be so disgusted by, even if they lack the age-defying powers of a Helen Mirren. Indeed, one recent study by AARP found that a third of 40-something women who were dating were dating younger men.

Physical attraction doesn’t abide by the rules that people like MGTOWs try to impose upon it. Contrary to the assertions of manosphere “wall theory,” not all men are forever obsessed with 18-year-old supermodel virgins.

One of the weirder aspects of straight male sexuality is that men are often afraid to admit when they find themselves attracted to women who don’t measure up to some arbitrary standard of conventional attractiveness.

That’s why you see so many teenage boys and young men online loudly proclaiming that they “would not bang” this or that celebrity woman due to some weird and imaginary flaws (“pointy elbows”); their proclamations are often so obviously and ridiculously untrue they’ve inspired a popular meme, here applied to a perfectly lovely cat:


MGTOWs are men who’ve never outgrown this phase; indeed, they’ve turned their cries of “would not bang” into a life philosophy of sorts. Some of them must realize that they’re protesting too much.

But others, like Nuggets, have become so enmeshed in their own nonsense they can’t ever see straight. Bad ideas can be a strangely powerful thing.


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6 years ago

He really left that one wide open.

6 years ago


You do realize that some feminists don’t believe in marriage right? And that men do benefit from marriage?

Laughing at these adult toddlers
Laughing at these adult toddlers
6 years ago


Yes, anon?

You think just like you say feminists thinks.

You are now banned: Following reasons, White Knighting.

6 years ago

Trigger warning for mild gross talk

That story is wonderful, as are the emoticons!

I had a classically bad series of interactions with a guy a few years ago. In hindsight, the whole thing was hilarious.

I responded to a personal ad in a San Francisco paper. The guy wrote and said that he actually lived in Los Angeles but would be moving to San Francisco soon and would be in touch then. Months went by and I mentally wrote him off. Then one day he called me. He had moved to SF and wanted to meet me.

After all those months, I was surprised.

We met and he seemed to be quite interested in me. Then he negged me by insulting my lack of computer geekiness. And he said that my German last name sounded like I was “fresh off the boat.” I didn’t say anything, but I thought, Dude, were you born in 1880? He seemed to be channeling his grandpa. I was baffled. I understood teasing, which can be funny or can be mean. But I had never heard of negging. And his teasing (negging) sounded forced, like he was trying to fit it into the conversation somehow. I didn’t understand why. I tried to laugh the whole thing off.

He wanted to meet for lunch. I didn’t think that we had a great rapport but he really did seem interested, so I said yes. We got together for lunch, and he still seemed interested. While we ate our Thai noodles, out of the blue, he uttered these immortal words:

Him: My feces are marvelous.

Me (shocked but trying really hard to laugh the whole thing off): Well, why don’t you build a house with them?

Him: Huh? I said that my feces are marbled.

Me: Ha, ha, ha!

But that’s not all–no, it’s not!

I talked to him on the phone later. I was still in shock and in denial. He told me that we weren’t going to be a couple but that I could join a communal living group that he was forming. Once I did that, he could pick out a guy for me from that group(!)

My conclusion: His relationship ad was a two-fer for him. He would either find a girlfriend or form a community with him as the guru. Perhaps he was inspired by another San Franciscan, Jim Jones of People’s Temple fame? Of course, the People’s Temple ended in a spectacularly bad way!

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