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Banned in the MRA!

Well, I have been banned from the Men’s Rights subreddit, evidently for mentioning The Spearhead too often. And also, apparently, because of Lorena Bobbit? Honesty, I’m not sure I fully understand why I’m banned; I am pretty sure I haven’t breached any of the tenets of Reddiquette in any of my comments in r/mr. See if you can figure it out:

I’m also banned from A Voice for Men. And Toysoldier. Not sure about The Spearhead. I don’t think so, but there’s not really much point posting somewhere where all dissenting commenters (and most women) are downvoted so thoroughly that you have to click a special link to even see them. I might or might not be able to comment on other MRA blogs, I don’t know.

But honestly, the only Men’s Rights forum I really have (or had) any reason or desire to comment in is the Men’s Rights subreddit, because for all of its faults it’s really the only MRA forum of any size that’s not completely overrun with misogynists and fanatics. The only one where there is even a chance of holding any kind of substantive discussions with MRAs online. And Ig has shut that door, at least for me.

(There are of course many other places to discuss things with MRAs online, like, you know, here, and NSWATM, and so on, but these places aren’t run by MRAs.)

I asked Ig if he would also ban the guy who wished me liver cancer earlier today. I have not heard back from him yet.

EDITED TO ADD: Ig has gotten back to me. He recommends that I “go to hell.” Meanwhile, the liver-cancer wisher has reaffirmed his desire that I “catch” cancer.

Elsewhere in r/mr, another fellow describes me as “an accumulation of grunge far worse than any of the quotes you mine.” Which doesn’t make a lot of sense, but at least has a spark of originality to it.

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Jessay (@jessay)
10 years ago

I just want to comment on the attempted rationalization of that online dating comment. For real? Because if I was to come on here and say that the last guy who rejected me, “was a worthless piece of shit just like all men,” MRAs would be having a field day, proof of misandry.

I don’t understand why some men seem to think that dating woes only apply to men and not to women. That women don’t face rejection, confusion, heartbreak, and suffering on account of the people they are interested in. And why it’s only seemingly ok to generalize all women based out of anger and frustration, but not the other way around? I mean, rape victims are frowned upon for perceiving all men as potential rapists after being brutalized, but this guy is justified in calling a woman a cunt for having the audacity to not be interested in him? This is a woman whose affections he has no stake in because it’s just some random from an online dating site who he hasn’t even met. He took her lack of interest that personally that he used it to justify his hateful opinions of women as a whole. That is somehow a valid response?

He didn’t exactly make her regret her decision to reject him either. That’s the funny thing about that sort of “I didn’t want you anyways!” type of reaction. It just solidifies our stance that we were right in rejecting your advances. You’re not hurting us or making yourself look better, just making us thank our lucky stars that we didn’t go home with you.

Side note: I got a message on OKC today from someone whose profile mentioned how he was tired of being friend-zoned. I was just like, “Really?” He also took my profile which is a joke from the show the IT Crowd seriously and made it clear that he was solely interested in me based on my looks (because that profile is not flattering) because I was his type. Sorry bro. Dudes who lament about being friend-zoned are not MY type. Cue him being mad because I didn’t give him the sex he deserved.

seranvali
10 years ago

I get really annoyed when people curse those they don’t like with various forms of cancer. That kind of obvious and concentrated malice can be quite upsetting and unsettling.

Maybe people who say that deserve to be put on chemotherapy for a month or two and see if they still feel like wishing extremely painful and potentially fatal illnesses on people just because they don’t agree with them.

Grrrr…

Sorry, for obvious reasons this particular piece of nastiness makes me want to bang their stupid, malicious heads together.

Crumbelievable
Crumbelievable
10 years ago

And then they say, “Feminists don’t like people who challenge their viewpoints!”

Never seen a feminist wish cancer on someone .

seranvali
10 years ago

Crumbelievable said:

“And then they say, “Feminists don’t like people who challenge their viewpoints.”

Never seen a feminist wish cancer on someone .”

Me neither. I’ve been through it and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. They really need to stop doing it. I don’t know, maybe having them spend time with the patients in a treatment room would teach them that you don’t say that kind of thing. Also: this stuff can be triggering if you’ve had to actually deal with it.

Kendra, the bionic mommy
Kendra, the bionic mommy
10 years ago

Buttman, you’re complaining that women’s health care tends to cost more than men’s. First, it’s important to note that some men need pap smears, birth control pills, and prenatal care, too. Cis men do not, but even they can benefit from insurance companies making women’s health care affordable. When a man has a pregnant partner, he also benefits from hir receiving good prenatal care. If a cis, straight couple doesn’t want to have a baby, they both benefit from the woman having affordable birth control. You describe health care as a source of conflict between men and women, but a lot of people don’t. They want their loved ones to have good health care regardless of gender.

Many of the prenatal health care provisions of the Affordable Care Act are more for the health of the fetus than the mother, and those provisions help just as many male babies as female babies. The Rh immune globulin doesn’t cost very much, but it can prevent Rhesus disease which can be fatal to newborns. The group B strep test and penicillin are easy, affordable ways to prevent Group B strep infections in newborns, which can also be fatal. You can look at the March of Dimes website to learn about all sorts of easy, cost effective ways good prenatal care can saves the lives of babies, half of whom are male.

What I’m trying to say here is that contraception and prenatal care are not just women’s issues. They are important for everyone.

ithiliana
ithiliana
10 years ago

@Kendra: Because I’m sure ButtTroll will simply live up to his name, I want to say how much I appreciated your very clear and detailed post about how it’s impossible to (logically) think that contraception and prenatal care are some sort of specialized women’s issues that teh menz should never have to deal with (because, cooties!).

Great stuff, and only some immature (which is not about age), illogical, unreasonable, prejudiced butthead would not be able to learn something.

Kendra, the bionic mommy
Kendra, the bionic mommy
10 years ago

Thanks, ithiliana. I agree that ButtTroll will probably not learn anything from what I wrote. If he reads it at all, he will probably respond with an unrelated rant. I sometimes motivate myself by hoping that open minded lurkers might read and learn even when the trolls keep being close minded asshats.

Pecunium
10 years ago

Kendra: That’s a large part of my debate philosophy. I don’t expect the Buttmen,and NWOs of the world to learn. I do think those who haven’t yet become like them might be swayed.

And sometimes (to my wonder and amazement) one of them does gain a clue. Hope springs eternal.

filo4000
filo4000
10 years ago

I got banned on near, if not same, as you from /r/mensrights, I guess they’re cracking down on dissenters

filo4000
filo4000
10 years ago

*same day

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