Categories
misandry special snowflaking that's not funny! twitter

The best and worst of #IfMenWerePutInCharge

So this hashtag popped up on Twitter today, a deliberately ironic poke at gender inequality (I asssume). There were a variety of reactions — some funny, some not-so-funny, and some that seemed to have floated in from another dimension.

Some used the hastag — as I think it was intended — as an excuse to post a variety of pictures of the “men are lazy and goofy and basically human-shaped wrecking balls” variety.

One Tweeter looked to history for an answer:

My favorite tweet of the bunch was, naturally, this one with a cat in it.

This Tweeter might just have licked off too much psychedelic toad venom.

But not all Tweeters approached the hashtag with such good humor. A few seemed to have missed the joke entirely:

This guy, who also missed the joke, tried to use the hashtag to promote a eugenic approach to COVID that would leave millions of people dead.

This Tweet from a reactionary snowflake took aim at the shocking — shocking! — misandry of the hashtag.

This guy hates mean hashtags and just wants everyone to get along.

This person, meanwhile, wants us forget the hashtag and just enjoy this brief video of a possum of unknown gender:

That reminds me of this amazing video of two raccoons interrupted during a midnight ramble.

#AnimalsAreTooGoodForUs aren’t they?

Follow me on Twitter.

Send tips to dfutrelle at gmail dot com.

We Hunted the Mammoth relies entirely on readers like you for its survival. If you appreciate our work, please send a few bucks our way! Thanks!

32 replies on “The best and worst of #IfMenWerePutInCharge”

Contrary to popular belief (and that website needs badly to improve their research), licking a cane toad will just make you sick. Getting high requires harvesting, drying, and smoking the poison (technically they are not venomous, that’s the stuff that’s injected. There are venomous frogs, but they have spikes). How the hell anybody discovered that is beyond me.

Maybe someone who licked a toad decided that that flavor was perfect for the hash blend they were working on? Only thing I got really got now.

Oh how dare that guy use Race Bannon for that twitter handle. he deserve more then that. I’m still convinced he was in love with doctor Quest.

The oppossum were appreciated.

Reminded me of the ones Mish sometimes does. 🙂

This makes me think of all those Facebook memes and posts about when dad gets put in charge of the kids and chaos reigns. It’s always mums with young kids eye-rolling over dad-related silliness/disasters, but honestly that small thrill women are awarded for being perceived as the sensible and together ones in hetero relationships has never earnt anyone regular lie-ins and nights out with friends, so I say let dads serve Haribo for dinner if it means they spend more time looking after their own bloody kids.

Questions from a literal-minded person:

If men were put in charge — by whom? of what?

I’m suspicious of this project from the get-go.

@ redsilkphoenix

Maybe someone who licked a toad decided that that flavor was perfect for the hash blend they were working on? 

The one thing I just can’t get my head round is ambergris.

I mean, how did it happen that at some stage someone said “You know what this expensive perfume really needs; whale barf.

Seriously, how on earth did they figure that one out!

Seriously, how on earth did they figure that one out!

Picked it up off the beach. You find the odd chunk from time to time, washed up on the western coasts. We’ve been making perfumes way longer than we’ve been whaling. 😛

Tangential side note: Was walking on Whitby “beach” (it’s a bunch of rocks at the base of the cliffs, that only shows at low tide) with my then brand new fiancee, and found a chunk of Jet the size of my fist. That paid for the rings and the town clerk very nicely indeed.

@ Threp

Oh I can see how they found the ambergris itself. It’s then deciding it’s just the thing for perfume I can’t fathom.

That’s a lovely romantic tale though. I do like Whitby. I believe it’s the highest goth per square mile ratio outside Camden.

I love Whitby too.
Although I always thought the the most implausible part of the original novel Dracula was the victorian heroine running from the top of the north cliff down over the bridge and all the way up to the abbey. I really don’t see how someone who’d (presumably) deformed their rib cage with Victorian corsets could do that.

@Alan:

The real question isn’t so much why they started using the weird smelly stuff they found on the beach; it’s why they kept using it after they discovered it was whale barf.

@ rabid rabbit

There was probably a similar conversation after silk worms were smuggled out of China.

“You know that really expensive fabric we’ve been buying?”

“Yup; I’m wearing it now. It’s so lovely against my skin.”

“Worm poop.”

I feel like the frog one is so wholesome. It makes me sad that we can’t all just live together in harmony, learning from one another how to care for our delightful froggy pets.

I would like to award Mr. O’Donnell one internet for his excellent tweet and perfect cat photo.

Two internets to David for adding those raccoons! I actually LOL when the one stood up.

One WTF to the people who apparently have a pet possum.

I love how Mr. Eugenics puts up his stat which says right in it that “it is a poor measure”. So much for reading comprehension.

@Elaine: Everyone knows Johnny Quest and Hadji had two daddies. But as the tweet is taking on the traditional patriarchy, and the bozos picture would disapprove of both same-sex parenting and Hadji’s mere existence, I’m willing to give him a pass on using the name.

I loved that cute fluffy opossum. They clean up nice, don’t they? I’ve only ever seen them flat & fly-specked** or looking like mangy rats.

**I believed for many years that opossums & armadillos do not live in the wild, but are imported dead & scattered along the shoulders of the roads every day by the DOT crews.

@Alan Robertshaw

I mean to be fair, humanity has also been using mercury and literal lead as makeup for that sweet, sweet fashion in human history.

This isn’t so much an endorsement of such trends of human behavoir than it is a bemused observation…

I want to make a joke about the WWII / khmer rouge / belgian Congo being the worst of IfMenWerePutInCharge, but I think something similar can easily happen with women in charges.

As for the best… The tactical, camo-printed baby diaper ? That’s useless as hell, but at least it’s a funny expression of patriarchy.

I can’t stop reading this as “if men were Putin”

If men were Putin they’d pose shirtless too much. That’d be my answer.

@ tactical progressive

Yeah! I went to a really interesting lecture on the history of make-up.

What was fascinating was that the deadly effects of make-up ingredients were fully understood at the time; even in the 1700s. Journals and news sheets even had cartoons about it!

If men were Putin Charge, they’d be coming soon to East Ukrainian localities not yet under occupation.

I must confess to not understanding why someone’s reaction to fries that have been ruined by getting them all soggy would be “YUMMMMMM”…

Ohlmann: for some confusing reason, anglophones don’t transliterate poutine the same way they transliterate Poutine. English is weird.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.