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alpha males beta males misogyny red pill

Red Pillers stunned that women date guys who don’t go to the gym

Wait, what’s she even doing with that skinny beta in the first place?

A young Redditor called mookg is perplexed: He’s noticed that, contrary to what he’s learned from the Red Pill subreddit, some women seem to prefer dating men who don’t look like big, beefy gym rats. So he turns to the Ask The Red Pill subreddit for answers.

Why do some women date weak men?,” he wonders.

I have noticed in my social circle, A lot of girls like dating skinny weak men (typical bluepill). My sister also just got engaged to a guy who has 0 fashion sense and just works 9-5 and has never stepped foot into a gym. She is 30.

I want to understand the psychology behind these women as to why they prefer weak men.

Huh. Why might women prefer men who don’t know the first thing about the Red Pill? Might this commonly observed fact suggest that perhaps the Red Pill is not the infallible guide to female psychology that its practitioners claim? Maybe some women don’t want their partners to be alpha male assholes who live in the gym and spend their time strategizing online about the best ways to dominate and manipulate them? Maybe life is not a Charles Atlas cartoon?

Nope. According to the Red Pillers on hand to answer the question, a woman’s lack of interest in alphas just means that there’s something deeply wrong with her, not with the alphas she’s rejecting.

“[W]omen only date up,” responds someone called reduxDev.

The women you are discussing in this post are losers. …

A good amount of women actually avoid superficially attractive men because its obvious they have options. A guy being hot/cute, fashionable, or jacked can deter women seeking monogamy from even trying.

“Some women are just masculine inside and they want a weak man to dominate,” declares Stoic-Alpha-01.

“A lot of women don’t like the high maintenance of HVMs [High Value Males] and don’t want to compete with other women,” adds Noodlesoupe2.

These women usually are control freaks and like being above their man so they have absolute adoration and control. It’s an ego boost.

Or maybe there’s something wrong with the men, and the women in question just want “[p]ussies who give away their money and material things,” as one commenter puts it.

“Some of these men start off strong and then are slowly broken down to becoming weak,” explains kclanton80.

[O]thers are chosen specifically cuz they’re weak because the woman can control them and exploit them for their resources.

Or, I dunno, maybe some women think “alpha” dudes are self-centered, misogynistic assholes and would rather date someone as far from “alpha” as possible? Or maybe they just prefer skinny nerdy dudes to jocks?

Nah, couldn’t be that. These women have got to all be a bunch of losers and ball-busters.

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Naglfar
Naglfar
1 year ago

FWIW I prefer less muscular men. There’s something a little intimidating to me about overly ripped guys. I like muscular women, but that just doesn’t translate over for my attraction to men. I’d imagine I’m not alone in this assessment either.

A lot of girls like dating skinny weak men

I’m by no means an expert, but I don’t think skinny inherently equals weak. My sister is pretty thin but has lean muscle and is way stronger than I am. I’m also on the skinny side but not that strong.

She is 30.

Rather surprised he didn’t throw in a quip about her age.

A guy being hot/cute, fashionable, or jacked can deter women seeking monogamy from even trying.

These are rather different things. I guess someone could be cute and fashionable or fashionable and jacked, but in my eyes, for a man to be cute and jacked are rather opposed. Maybe someone can prove me wrong, but I thought those two would be opposites.

Or maybe they just prefer skinny nerdy dudes to jocks

Something I’ve noticed is that nerdy men can sometimes be just as misogynistic as jocks. They manifest it differently, but there is definitely a possibility for misogyny and abuse there as well.

Last edited 1 year ago by Naglfar
Demonhype
Demonhype
1 year ago

@ Naglfar

Me too! Pansexual here, and big jacked guys don’t do it for me (though I’ve found some attractive due to other characteristics that overshadowed that for me, like brains or personality, etc), but skinny little nerdy guys are just so cute right out of the box. Yet I find women with muscles very attractive (and I swear that, though I lean toward men, if I ever met a real life woman anything like Scorpia from the She-Ra reboot, both image and personality, I’d fall instantly in love and never look back). So many characteristics I find attractive in women but not men or vice versa, and never the ones these jackasses insist I must be into.

Also, they never consider that my standard of cute, fashionable, etc may not be theirs. Because they, like my dad, seem to suffer from “I am the world and my standards are the world’s standards” mentality.

Naglfar
Naglfar
1 year ago

@Demonhype

skinny little nerdy guys are just so cute right out of the box.

For sure. Also more likely to have common interests with me, as I’m also a bit nerdy leaning.

So many characteristics I find attractive in women but not men or vice versa, and never the ones these jackasses insist I must be into.

Same here. Although all kinds of people can be attractive, I prefer many of the characteristics that aren’t typically associated with a given gender. Like how I like masculine/butch women but don’t really have as much interest in overly masculine guys.

Also, they never consider that my standard of cute, fashionable, etc may not be theirs.

This is also important. I’ve known a lot of people who have very different ideas about fashion. To some it means wearing name brand casual items, to others it means always wearing an expensive suit, and anywhere in between. I’m still learning about fashion, I spent a lot of my life not really paying attention but am now starting to develop more style and knowledge.

rabid rabbit
rabid rabbit
1 year ago

Of all the possible reasons to not like your soon-to-be in-law…

.45
.45
1 year ago

@Naglfar

“I’m still learning about fashion, I spent a lot of my life not really paying attention but am now starting to develop more style and knowledge.”

Ditto here. I have found it much more interesting in the last few years, started to experiment with more old fashioned mens style, see what I find I like, what I don’t, etc. Retail therapy in the form of online shopping seems to help me a bit in the time of Covid, so I have intensified my efforts as of late.

Amusingly, for some degree of “amusing”, this seems to have raised a concern for my father. He mentioned my new found fondness for a good thick sweater as a possible indication that I am gay. Since I have not exactly been tearing up the dating scene with the ladies, it struck me that he might not be making casual conversation and could be fishing for an actual admission.

Naturally, though I am fairly straight, I decided to be me, and gave him nothing. Took something of a “Yeah, sure, whatever” attitude without any hints.

Let him wonder. Half my siblings have experimented a little here and there, it wouldn’t be a surprise…

Sheila Crosby
1 year ago

I find the marathon runner physique more attractive than muscle-bound weight-lifters, but respect, kindness and a sense of humour are far more important anyway.

Kat, ambassador, feminist revolution (in exile)
Kat, ambassador, feminist revolution (in exile)
1 year ago

I want to understand the psychology behind these women as to why they prefer weak men.

You have certainly turned to the right source. Don’t talk to a couples counselor. Don’t read a book by a couples counselor. Don’t ask your friends who are dating skinny guys. And certainly don’t ask your sister. (That would be the worst option.) No, ask the guys who will never let you down: the guys who have swallowed the Red Pill, the guys who hate women.

Buttercup Q. Skullpants
Buttercup Q. Skullpants
1 year ago

@Kat These guys don’t want to understand women. They want to manipulate and dominate them, and who better to coach them on that than a guy?

I dated a muscular gym rat once. He was a semi-pro football player. Decent guy, but overly focused on fitness. All he could talk about was workouts and muscles and protein shakes. His whole life revolved around staying in shape. I was bored silly, and he couldn’t relate to any of my weird interests. We just weren’t compatible, so we parted company amicably. Hopefully he found an equally enthusiastic fitness buff.

Lumipuna
Lumipuna
1 year ago

OT but I just saw this joke going big on Twitter:

Christopher Levi Twitterissä: “@GOLDENCGP Him being Timo is the funniest part” / Twitter

And I don’t get the last part. (I’m curious because Timo is a normal Finnish man’s name)

North Sea Sparkly Dragon
North Sea Sparkly Dragon
1 year ago

Maybe mookg should just ask his sister about why she likes skinny guys?

Threp (formerly Shadowplay)
Threp (formerly Shadowplay)
1 year ago

Maybe mookg should just ask his sister about why she likes skinny guys?

Ask a woman something?

Yeah, right.

Battering Lamb
Battering Lamb
1 year ago

Ah, here are the redpiller, projecting as always. Like the huge dick thing. Most women I know prefer skinnier types. My partner loves muscular arms (especially in women), but when it comes to dudes they generally prefer effeminate types. And elves.

Re: Attractiveness. Most men I’ve found attractive have been fairly fit, but not Professional-wrestler jacked. As for skinny, it really depends on the build and some other factors. One of the first things I pay attention too is voice, since I need to be pretty close to be able to really see facial features, so those are fun but not really the first thing I pay attention too. I also really dislike hair gel (both the feel and the look), so most of those hairstyles will plummet my interest pretty quickly (Except for Daniel Dae Kim. I prefer him without hairgel, but that is one of the sexiest men ever imo).

As for women, it goes all over the place. There’s certain styles that don’t appeal to me at all, but aside from that… I second the Scorpia sentiment, expecially that prom episode. Butch ladies in dresses and more femme women in suits are awesome.

Naglfar
Naglfar
1 year ago

@Battering Lamb

My partner loves muscular arms (especially in women), but when it comes to dudes they generally prefer effeminate types. And elves.

I agree. I’m not opposed to muscular men, it’s just not my thing the way muscular women are.

Still, bodybuilders (men or women) don’t really do it for me, I guess because it’s all taken to an extreme (and IIRC is rather physically unhealthy).

Butch ladies in dresses and more femme women in suits are awesome.

Yes. I’ve never watched She-Ra (the original or the reboot) but I keep meaning to look into it if I have the time.

Battering Lamb
Battering Lamb
1 year ago

@Naglfar: I highly recommend it. Just refreshing to see a show where the queerness of characters is just there. There’s no coming out, prejudice or closet-angst. Nobody bats an eye. The fact that it’s also just a really solid show and the voice-cast really nails it makes it even better.

Also, yeah, full body-builder mode doesn’t work for anyone. I always wonder if that much muscle inhibits your mobility. And it always looks weird if someone’s head is directly attached to their torso.

Naglfar
Naglfar
1 year ago

@Battering Lamb

I always wonder if that much muscle inhibits your mobility.

I would imagine it does, especially seeing as many bodybuilders inject synthetic oil into muscles, which makes them appear larger but weakens them and adds dead weight. And then there’s the damage of the diet and routines they adopt, like bulking and shredding. And the steroids and the pseudoscientific additional stuff.

Re: heads, I also just think the proportions look strange when someone’s body is extremely muscular but their head is normal looking, it just looks small in comparison.

Last edited 1 year ago by Naglfar
Threp (formerly Shadowplay)
Threp (formerly Shadowplay)
1 year ago

I always wonder if that much muscle inhibits your mobility.

Wonder no more.

The term muscle-bound were coined in 1876 to describe that exact phenomenon.

Cyborgette
Cyborgette
1 year ago

Yeah, add another to the “skinny nerdy guys are hotter” club.

@Naglfar I feel that. Physical strength advantage is a thing I have a much easier time trusting women with in a relationship than men, though… honestly I’ve had a couple bad experiences with very strong women too. But even then it’s a whole different experience. There’s a whole level of anxiety I have just being around huge blundering men, knowing how vulnerable I am and how casually violent they can be – and just how physically careless.

Naglfar
Naglfar
1 year ago

@Cyborgette

There’s a whole level of anxiety I have just being around huge blundering men, knowing how vulnerable I am

I definitely feel this. There’s just something about that presence that can scare me a bit, especially if there’s no one else around. It’s also probably a part of why I never got into sports either as a participant or viewer, because that body type is very common in most sports.

Cyborgette
Cyborgette
1 year ago

@Naglfar oh gods also mood. Gym class with basketballs flying everywhere, including being thrown at my face because I was nerdy and probably gay? Check.

See this is the funny and bitterly ironic thing, I’m into skinny nerdy guys now for a lot of the same reasons these Red Pill creeps are angry at “Chad”: this kind of physical bullying didn’t just die back in the 80s, and I got to see it very up close and personal. I know what it’s like to be constantly getting beat up and harassed for how I look, how I walk, how I talk. But now these nerdy guys are in their 30s, feeling like failures, and letting that anger drive them to embrace the same misogyny and homophobia that made the jocks such a horror show, and just… ugh SMH.

I’m so glad I’m bi and not straight. So, so glad.

Naglfar
Naglfar
1 year ago

@Cyborgette

Gym class with basketballs flying everywhere, including being thrown at my face because I was nerdy and probably gay?

I remember that. I am terrible at every physical sport as well, which didn’t help. My elementary school gym teacher was a huge guy with a shaved head and who would openly berate any student who didn’t live up to his standards. Mostly I hung out on the sidelines doing the bare minimum to get credit. Middle school was the same thing with a different guy, and by the time I got to high school I figured out I could get around the gym credit requirement if I took marching band. That wasn’t great either, but it was better than playing more sports.

But now these nerdy guys are in their 30s, feeling like failures, and letting that anger drive them to embrace the same misogyny and homophobia that made the jocks such a horror show, and just… ugh

That’s what I was referring to in my first comment where I said nerds could be misogynistic as well. Despite fitting the profile for being nerdy I’ve stayed away from a lot of that community’s gatherings and events because of the misogyny and homophobia. I know too many people who’ve gone down that path.

I’m so glad I’m bi and not straight. So, so glad.

100%. I’m also bi but have a preference for women over men, so I mainly date women and am really glad I am not exclusively attracted to men.

Lainy
Lainy
1 year ago

I like somewhat fit guys cause I’m a pretty active person myself. It’s nice to work out along side my husband, but the things I really love about him is his geek tendencies. We’re both fairly introverted. A night inside sounds a lot more appealing then going out. tbh with how much I am attracted to him it has really gone beyond just his body. I have never been more attracted to someone then I am my husband. if his appearance changed dramatically I would still be attracted to him and probably will be through out the rest of our lives.

As for fashion? yeah the man knows nothing about fashion. He doesn’t care about it. If you ever see a Hispanic looking man in Green basketball shorts and a bright orange t-shirt next to an overly dressed goth who looks like she took several hours to get her outfit and makeup just right, while he looks like he probably slept in his clothes, that’s my husband and i.

Bakunin
Bakunin
1 year ago

So women don’t want to “looksmatch” and all want to date Chad 10s, but also don’t want guys who are too hot because they have options? Glad we cleared that up

Lukas Xavier
Lukas Xavier
1 year ago

Ask a woman something?

Yeah, right.

It would require listening to her, so I guess that rules it out.

.45
.45
1 year ago

Concerning the bodybuilder thing being a mobility issue, I heard a long time ago that Arnold Schwarzenegger had to slim down for his role as Conan the Barbarian because he was so musclebound he couldn’t lift his arms above his head high enough to properly swing a sword. Guess there is a reason you rarely see bodybuilders successfully competing in other physical activities…

North Sea Sparkly Dragon
North Sea Sparkly Dragon
1 year ago

@Threp and Lukas,

Excellent points.

I’m also among the geeky skinny men are more attractive than the overly-muscled types. I just find it so ridiculous looking and the men I know who are ‘jacked’ are deeply unpleasant individuals with serious insecurities that they project on to everyone around them. I like men with muscle because they do actual physical labour rather than from spending their lives in the gym. That slim, proportionate muscle.

And my taste in other genders is all over the place. I really prefer funny, geeky, bookish people who respect my weirdness.

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