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Sick of women? Date a succubus, mystical MGTOW recommends — and he’s not speaking metaphorically

Watch out boy, she’ll eat you up

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By David Futrelle

Some so-called Men Going Their Own Way really do go their own way. Take, for example, an anonymous fellow who showed up on the MGTOW.com forums some time ago with some out-of-the-box dating advice for men who have given up on women: Why not literally conjure up a succubus, and have sex with her?

While MGTOWs often compare women to soul-sucking succubi, Mr. Anonymous wasn’t speaking metaphorically. He claimed to have evoked a succubus from the depths of hell, or wherever they live, and boasted that the two of them were having a grand time together.

“I’ve been involved with a Succubus (generic title for an infinite number of races of spirits, basically) and I can say that it has been a real blessing,” he explained.

Anonymous assured his MGTOW colleagues that succubi aren’t the monsters they’re generally portrayed as. “They are not ‘demons’ nor ‘angels’, nor were they ‘men or women.’ he wrote. “They are they.”

And these spirit ladies (who aren’t really ladies) have many advantages over flesh-and-blood women. For one thing, Anonymous explained,

they don’t understand feminism. At all. In their hierarchy it’s wisdom and power [that rule], regardless of gender. Frankly, they don’t even care to discuss it. I think it’s because the idea is so alien to their own society that they just don’t care.

Also, they’re apparently just dynamite in the sack, or at least in the spirit-world equivalent of the sack.

For a quick example, one night my succubus pulled me out of my body to “somewhere” and started shining brightly. My whole body started humming, and then I had 4 full body orgasms in about 30 seconds. I was then put back in my body, and awoke a quivering mass of flesh. A very bewildered, awed, person of quivering flesh. Lol.

Lol indeed! No way that could just have been a really vivid wet dream.

The only drawback? He’s lost all interest in human women.

The only downside I have experienced (which I consider a plus, actually) is that the desire to have sex with a woman is often shed. I find that is because, the way these spirits love and have spiritual sex with you, the intimacy is such that nothing will ever compare. No sensation will ever compare.

If this sounds good to you, you might wonder how exactly you can go about finding your own succubus lover, given that there is no such thing as an OkSuccubus or a spirit-world version of Tinder — Spinder, maybe?

Anonymous helpfully provided links to several guides offering the inside scoop on succubus-evoking rituals. And don’t worry! You don’t have to sell your soul to Satan in order for the rituals to work. “I’m not a satanist, theistic or otherwise so I don’t like the ‘pray to father satan’ line,” Anonymous noted of one of the rituals. “That’s not necessary, anyway, in my experience.”

But you do need “to be honest with yourself with what you really want in a succubus lover.”

Indeed, according to one of the guides he links to, it’s very important to let your prospective demon honey know what kind of relationship you’re looking for — whether you’re a one-succubus man or someone who prefers to play the succubus field. Monogamous succubi, the guide warns,

take monogamy VERY seriously and if a relationship is violated by a human being, the partner of the human being could in the worst of cases wind up dead. Demons are known like humans to become very jealous. …

You should find a Demon who is compatible with you. Remember, if you want a free, open relationship where you are free to have other sex partners, you must specify this in ritual.

This all sounds like great advice for the MGTOWs of the world Indeed, I encourage all MGTOWs to follow Mr. Anonymous’s lead and confine all their sexual activity to the, er, spiritual realm.

CORRECTION; Corrected the attribution of the MGTOW.com post.

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Victorious Parasol
Victorious Parasol
3 years ago

I can’t help but see this as yet another thing for MGTOWs to complain about.

“I did the ritual PERFECTLY, but they sent me a 5, and I had SPECIFIED a succubus rated 9 to 10. Would not summon again!”

Lewis
Lewis
3 years ago

Am I reading the link wrong, or is the first personal testimonial anonymous, and Darth Tyranus just says it is an intriguing idea?

Alex
Alex
3 years ago

Well, it worked for medieval priests at universities, and they had the same kind levels of baggage, so I’m sure summoning sex demons will be perfectly fine.

Bina
3 years ago

The only downside I have experienced (which I consider a plus, actually) is that the desire to have sex with a woman is often shed. I find that is because, the way these spirits love and have spiritual sex with you, the intimacy is such that nothing will ever compare. No sensation will ever compare.

Speaking as a mortal woman, I am utterly relieved at this so-called downside. Because at least this one nincompoop won’t be coming anywhere near ME.

PS: Here’s a fun story about women who have sex with ghosts. Because why should wet-dreaming migtoes have all the fun?

kupo
kupo
3 years ago

I’m glad this dude is enjoying his sleep paralysis. (I assume, based on the description.) I hope he doesn’t get the evil presence kind (sincerely, it’s awful and I wouldn’t even wish it on a MGTOW).

weirwoodtreehugger: chief manatee

Don’t succubi have a true demonic visage hidden under the hot chick surface? You know, like how MGTOW think human women look when they take off their makeup? They seem like beings of great misandry to me.

Rabid Rabbit
Rabid Rabbit
3 years ago

Depends on who you ask. The bit he clearly hasn’t considered is that succubi are the original spermjackers, and that as soon as she’s done with him, she’s going to fly off, turn into an incubus, and go impregnate some poor girl who’ll probably hit him up for child support in a few years.

IgnoreSandra
IgnoreSandra
3 years ago

Succubi, or the myth of them, are one of the inspirations for how I live my life. They clearly take no man’s shit, and treat men as disposable cattle for the goals they have, while looking fly as all hell in the process.

Snowberry
Snowberry
3 years ago

The myth that I’ve heard is that a succubus will have sex with a man while he sleeps, then turn into an incubus, and then have sex with women while she sleeps, attempting to impregnate her with the stolen and corrupted semen, and then turn back into a succubus. If it works (it often doesn’t), then the baby born from this will be unusual, very likely powerful, possibly able to use magic, and usually but not always evil. (Merlin was supposedly born from a succubus/incubus in this manner.)

I’ve also heard that they have sex with men while sleeping, then turn into ugly monsters who then sit on the sleepers for a bit, causing them to become fully awake, paralyzed, and panicking. However, this description also applies to a (possibly) different kind of being known as a night hag.

More modern depictions have succubi and incubi as separate genders of the same kind of being, normally appearing as highly attractive men/women with demonic features and some shapeshifting ability. Or they might have no particular inherent gender but generally choose “female” as their default appearance. In the cases where there are separate genders, I’ve occasionally seen “cacubi” to refer to both collectively, but this doesn’t appear to have caught on.

Weird (and tired of trumplings) Eddie
Weird (and tired of trumplings) Eddie
3 years ago

I just dunno… I grew up in the horror comic era, Tales from the Crypt, Demon Hunter, etc. There were a myriad of stories featuring a human (usually male) getting it on with a succubus…. Usually, after they got off, the human got… offed, in a very unpleasant manner.

I’ll hafta pass.

Alexis Filth
3 years ago

My husband and I do a pretty kinky incubus BDSM “scene” occasionally. That’s what this post reminded me of.

James Hutchings
3 years ago

The idea that incubbi and succubi are the same creatures is in the Malleus Maleficarum. It also says that they will only have penis-in-vagina sex because of their high moral standards.

Specialffrog
Specialffrog
3 years ago

Should MGTOW just join the cenobites?

Bakunin
Bakunin
3 years ago

@Snowberry
Rogue-like game nethack refers to sucubi and incubi collectively as foocubi. Pointless trivia.

This reminds me of the Warhammer 40k comic Turn Signals on a Land Raider, specifically when one character refers to daemonettes as ladys.

Lainy
Lainy
3 years ago

@Alexis Filth

Same

Catalpa
Catalpa
3 years ago

One word for non-gendered versions of incubi/succubi that I saw floating around on tumblr would be concubi. Since incubus means (roughly translated from latin) to lie on top of, and succubus means to lie beneath, concubus would be to lie alongside.

As for the MGTOWs, I wish them all the best of luck in summoning some kind of supernatural partner and staying far, far away from any real women. Seems like an ideal solution, at least if “actually taking their heads out of their asses” is totally off the table.

Boob Tyrant Queen
Boob Tyrant Queen
3 years ago

My two thoughts
1- Don’t Succubi kill their victims after? Or are least make their lives a torrent of misery (like oddly sexy student loans ) ?

2- Why just summon a sex demon when you could summon a demon to do taxes, yardwork , talk to your ex when they drunk call/text you?
Sex is liming the demon potential?

Lucrece
Lucrece
3 years ago

…take monogamy VERY seriously…

…are known…to become very jealous…

…find a Demon who is compatible with you…

…if you want a free, open relationship…you must specify this in ritual…

Forgive me for saying so, but these demons are starting to sound like more “trouble” thuan an actual human-to-human relationship with a real woman.

TheKND
TheKND
3 years ago

Sure, it’s all fun and games with summoning the forces of the netherworld for sexual gratification. But I tell you, one day, this guy will have a scribble in his glyphs and bam: Summons a Shoggoth and we all die in a world of insanity and melting flesh.
I can still remember when that happened to me…

Weatherwax
Weatherwax
3 years ago

@ Boob Tyrant Queen

Or are least make their lives a torrent of misery (like oddly sexy student loans ) ?

I salute you for the student loan reference.

Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile
Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile
3 years ago

@Lucrece

…take monogamy VERY seriously…

…are known…to become very jealous…

…find a Demon who is compatible with you…

…if you want a free, open relationship…you must specify this in ritual…

Forgive me for saying so, but these demons are starting to sound like more “trouble” than an actual human-to-human relationship with a real woman.

Problems are bound to occur in any relationship, even a human-demon one. Can’t you just be happy for this MGTOW and his demon lover?

fiercebadrabbit
fiercebadrabbit
3 years ago

they don’t understand feminism. At all. In their hierarchy it’s wisdom and power [that rule], regardless of gender. Frankly, they don’t even care to discuss it. I think it’s because the idea is so alien to their own society that they just don’t care.

Belladonna the Cosmically Adored, rising from a summoning circle: Mortal, are you prepared to know heights of pleasure and pain beyond your wildest imagin–

This dude: What do you think of feminism?

BtCA: …Sorry. What?

This dude: Like, who rules your society?

BtCA: Oh, uh, okay, it… it’s power that interests you, mortal? Together, we will explore power and–

This dude: Not feminism, right? Lady demons don’t use their wiles and makeup to make guy demons buy them bonbons with their tax dollars and stuff, right?

BtCA: I’m going to need you to stop talking now.

Cat Mara
Cat Mara
3 years ago

@Kat:

Problems are bound to occur in any relationship, even a human-demon one. Can’t you just be happy for this MGTOW and his demon lover?

Getting a flashback to the old MTV Daria cartoon: “Demon women… and the men who love them! Tonight, on SICK SAD WORLD!” ?

Juniper
Juniper
3 years ago

So this guy thinks a succubus is basically a magical/spiritual version of a sexbot. He’s basically making the same argument as the, “I’m going to reject human women and just have sex with my sexbot” dudes. He’s just doing it in the fantasy/horror section rather than sci-fi.

But I was also under the impression that succubi killed the men they had sex with, and that was a pretty standard part of the lore.

Reminds me of a British show on years ago called “Being Human” that I liked (or at least the first couple of seasons). There was an episode with a woman who had terrible luck with men. She’d fall in love with a man, but as soon as they had sex, he’d suddenly die of a heart attack. Turned out she was a succubus and didn’t know it and felt terrible about it. I think she ended up paired up with a vampire because vampires are immortal so she couldn’t kill him when they had sex.

But yeah, if this guy is happy with his demon lover that gives him everything he wants and it’s made him uninterested in human women, great! This may be a great alternative to sexbots, since it’s probably cheaper to summon a demon lover with some candles and incense from the local occult shop.

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