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Prevent future incel terrorism by banning makeup, forcing women to have sex with creepy weirdos, creepy weirdo suggests

Cher weaponizes her eyelashes in an attempt to bamboozle men with makeup trickery

By David Futrelle

So here’s a screenshot floating around the internet that offers a sensible, common-sense solution to the problem of incels literally murdering people because they’re angry no hot women with have sex with them.

And by “sensible” and” “common-sense” I mean, “what the fucking fuck is this fuckery?”

Here’s the full text if you’d rather not squint at that:

People make is sound as if the “Incel Rebellion” is a laughing matter and that people don’t understand problem.

The incels are not the problem, but rather they are a symptom that something is very wrong in our society — and unless their legitimate grievances are addressed this could very soon spiral out of control just like what happened in Iraq, Libya and Syria when their respective governments refused to address and deal with the legitimate grievances a portion of their popolation had.

Calling the Incels a bunch of virgins and “frustrated losers with communication skills equal to that of an autistic potato” is oversimplifying the problem yes they are all that but why are they frustrated virgins?

The real issue is that with the advancement of makeup, healthy at any size bullshit, feminism and through social engineering a lot of women have become detached from reality. The reason these Incels arn’t getting laid is because women with a sexual market value equal to theirs use makeup to go from a 3/10 – 7/10 (false marketing in my opinion and should be a punishable offense) to fuck with men above their league.

So I propose that rather than making Incels look bad we look at the reasons they’ve become this way and what steps we can take to deconflict and reverse things because, let’s be real calling them names, labeling them a terrorist organization etc isn’t going to make the problem go away.

There are several ways I propose we do this:

1) Women are no longer allowed to wear makeup, ie falsely advertise their beauty and hence stop them from banging guys above their league.

2) Women are only allowed to date men with equal sexual market value to them. State-mandated tests should be made and everyone get a sexual-market value card ranging from 1/10 to 10/10, like an ID card.

3) Every time a woman sleeps with a new man she lose one 1 rank on her sexual-market value card until she reach the lowest rank 1/10.

4) There’s no way to rise through the ranks other than through excercise

5) Women with more than 9 sexual partners and single moms should be forced by the state to date and have sex with incels that can’t get any women despite the above changes.

This would deal with the problem not the symptom and is the ay we deal with everything from counter-piracy to counter- terrorism. The incel threat is real and should be treated the same way.

Though I haven’t been able to track this screenshot to its source, my guess — as someone who has been reading this sort of shit for years — is that it’s a sincere post from an incel sympathizer. If it’s a parody, and I really don’t think it is, it’s pitch-perfect, written by someone who has utterly mastered contemporary internet misogynist logic.

H/T —  r/BadEconomics via Talia Lavin on Twitter.

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Ohlmann
Ohlmann
4 years ago

Each time one of thoses bozos use the word “autistic”, I wonder if they ever have encountered one.

@Zlz : in addition to saying your comment is just odious, I would like to remind the following fact :
* the only condition we can say for sure the incel community have in common is “being assholes”. And it would be extremely surprising for the scientist community to discover that there is an actual illness that cause that.
* most diseases and conditions aren’t actually 100% genetic. If, and that’s a very big if, their behavior was an actual illness, that don’t mean it would be passed down on their sons and daughters, nor would it mean that they couldn’t infect other peoples.
* there is 0 proof that so called incels actually don’t reproduce. If memory serve well, at least was outed as having a wife. Plus all the rape fantasy

Valentin - Emigrantski Ragamuffin
Valentin - Emigrantski Ragamuffin
4 years ago

Dvärghundspossen

negative looks is a mirror ?

Alan Robertshaw
4 years ago

Oh no, the maths in this is confusing enough without getting into negative numbers; it’ll be blooming fractions next.

EJ (The Other One)
4 years ago

@Dvärghundspossen:
If you sleep with exactly 32,768 people, then it wraps around and becomes positive again.

kupo
kupo
4 years ago

@EJ
comment image

Justalurker
Justalurker
4 years ago

Hello there. I’ve been lurking here for quite a while, but the Toronto attack pushed me towards participating in the discussion.

mostly because i do not find myself capable of condemning the guy. i know all too much how it is to look into the mirror and see a substandart male that cannot get laid. how it is to look around yourself and see love and passion that people show to each other, and not be invited to that party, no matter how hard you try.

10+ sexual partners later, being in a relationship… i still feel this pain. i know how he felt, how this anguish could drive him mad. and while i would never do anything remotely like this, i feel like a monster for feeling nothing but compassion towards him. This event is the first thing to make me cry since i’ve started taking my SSRI meds.

Please tell me it does not make me a monster.

Alan Robertshaw
4 years ago

@ Zlz

If you’re hoping for a screenshot of someone agreeing with you so you can do a “feminist admits it” blackpill gotcha screenshot for that weird ‘femoids want to eugenic us out of existence’ thing you’ve got going on on braincels, then I’m afraid you’ve come to the wrong place.

ETA: wow, the last time I saw a sentence that long it was for a bank robbery.

Violet the Vile, Wielder of an Ideologically Weaponized Vagina
Violet the Vile, Wielder of an Ideologically Weaponized Vagina
4 years ago

@Alan

If “number of partners” = n
Perceived SMV = positive fraction of 10
Sexual desirability extinction age (k) = 19
The delusion of incels = infinite
And actual SMV is represented by the poo emoji –

– then what percentage of women have a high enough SMV to tap into the brains of incels and use the energy to power their hair straighteners?

kupo
kupo
4 years ago

@Violet
Are we converting to Joules from metric or imperial poo emoji?

Moggie
Moggie
4 years ago

Violet, am I allowed to assume a perfectly spherical incel in vacuum?

Buttercup Q. Skullpants
Buttercup Q. Skullpants
4 years ago

Oo, math riddles!

You have an incel, a Chad, a sexbot, and a boat that can hold one passenger. Chad and the incel can’t be left alone together, because Chad will make the incel feel bad about his prognathic vertices. The incel and the sexbot can’t be left alone together, because the factory warranty expired one week ago.

Q: How quickly will GoFundMe reach its goal of sending the incel to Snake Island?

Binjabreel
4 years ago

@buttercup

OOOH I know this one! The answer is “Imhotep is invisible”.

Rabid Rabbit
Rabid Rabbit
4 years ago

I think we’re doing the math wrong.

Only imaginary numbers are involved.

Weird (and tired of trumplings) Eddie
Weird (and tired of trumplings) Eddie
4 years ago

Friends, this math is invalid. With the incel in the equation, either the incel must always be on the top of the equation (theoretically impossible since incels culturally gravitate to the lowest level), or at some point you’re dividing by the incel and x/0 is invalid…

sorry….

E.T.A. @ Rabid Rabbit: oops, Binjabreel…

Imhotep…

http://images2.fanpop.com/image/photos/10500000/Imhotep-The-Mummy-high-priest-imhotep-10542680-720-540.jpg

but check that canthal tilt!!

Cindy
Cindy
4 years ago

Those poor snakes.

Binjabreel
4 years ago

Pharoah Imchadtep

ETA: this was the joke I was referencing in case other people aren’t familiar with loopy fake British educational programs https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=6L0xT8lMyss

Alan Robertshaw
4 years ago

@ binjabreel

Thanks ants. Thants.

EJ (The Other One)
4 years ago

@Moggie:
Only if the incels are travelling slowly enough that we can use Newtonian mechanics.

Buttercup Q. Skullpants
Buttercup Q. Skullpants
4 years ago

@Binjabreel – Correct! Also, the ladies were eight pence short, and the party was cancelled.

Moggie
Moggie
4 years ago

@Alan,
What are birds? We just don’t know.

Moggie
Moggie
4 years ago

@EJ(TOO),
I’m not sure I like the thought of incels moving at relativistic speeds. What would Lorentz contraction do to their wrists?

Violet the Vile, Wielder of an Ideologically Weaponised Vagina
Violet the Vile, Wielder of an Ideologically Weaponised Vagina
4 years ago

Further guidance:

The incel is travelling at a constant speed of 50km/hr and has a wrist circumference of 20cm
We are using metric poo emojis throughout
Imhotep is 3m tall and weighs 500 pounds
The hair straighteners are by Nicky Clarke

Alan Robertshaw
4 years ago

“The largest number is about 45,000,000,000 although mathematicians suspect that there may be even larger numbers”

Surplus to Requirements, Observer of the Vast Blight-Wing Enstupidation
Surplus to Requirements, Observer of the Vast Blight-Wing Enstupidation
4 years ago

@Alan:

Oh no, the maths in this is confusing enough without getting into negative numbers; it’ll be blooming fractions next.

Complex numbers with transcendental real and imaginary parts.

Binjabreel
4 years ago

I used to love showing these to my summer school students without telling them that they were a joke.

We’d usually get as far as
“Maths is an acronym which stands for
Mathematical
Anti
Telharsic
Harfatum
Septomin”
before they demanded answers.

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