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This Alt-Right Reservoir Dogs title sequence is the cringiest cringy cringe video crin

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Note to aspiring douchebag filmmakers: Filming a group of dudes walking down the street does not make you Quentin Tarantino.

Note to groups of dudes walking down the street: walking down the street in a group does not make you cool.

Both of these statements go double for any group of dudes that includes Davis Aurini, Matt Forney, Aaron Clarey and/or whoever those other dudes in the video are.

If you don’t feel like watching the whole video, this screengrab captures some of the excitement:

mattdogs

Here for purposes of comparison, is the original Reservoir Dogs title sequence.

And here, for somewhat less direct comparison purposes, is a capybara eating celery:

Also, Alt-Right dudes, in case you’re thinking of making any more homages to Quentin Tarantino, please keep in mind that Quentin Tarantino HATES NAZIS.

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Alan Robertshaw
5 years ago

@ rhuu

I used to do that, but I still got stuck with the actual stalk not fully splitting and the resulting twisting and pulling ending with the mess Bill mentions. So I think we have to give this one to the monkeys.

(We sussed fire, and calculators, and Pokemon and stuff though; so I think we still win)

tricyclist
tricyclist
5 years ago

@Fade

He was convicted. Went to prison. Appealed, Lost – appealed again, lost. That would normally be the end. But being a rich footballer with a rich girlfriend’s father was able to buy a criminal cases review which referred for a third appeal.

This court quashed the original conviction in favour of a retrial – which started yesterday.

Citizen Justin
5 years ago

@ mildlymagnificent, Alan Robertshaw

Yes, that’s what I tell people too. The advantage is that you don’t get the strings of pith that occur if you peel it the established way.

Not all monkeys bother with peeling bananas however, and some of the ones that do, eat the peel and throw the banana away. This last can be more a case of the individual monkey’s taste than species behaviour.

Citizen Justin
5 years ago

More on topic, the film ‘Reservoir Dogs’ was not about a bunch of cool guys on a mission so much as a bunch of unredeemable assholes who botched the job and ended up violently turning on each other amid much hysterical screaming. It was also, as I recall, very entertaining to watch. A bit like that time when Aurini and his mate Jordan Owen botched their own job and ended up turning on each other amid much hysterical screaming, come to think of it. Seeing this, I sense more entertainment ahead.

EDIT: I just read Michael Lindsay’s comment. He got there before me.

weirwoodtreehugger: communist bonobo

It’s weird how Tarantino characters are like that. They’re frequently unsuccessful in their missions and come to bad ends but always look cool doing it and that’s all we remember.

Except for Beatrix/The Bride. She was super successful. MISANDRY.

Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
5 years ago

@WWTH
And Django. WHITE GENOCIDE!!!

calmdown
calmdown
5 years ago

Kevin Logan edit:

Weatherwax
Weatherwax
5 years ago

It’s almost like they don’t understand how the aesthetic feeds into the cool. Also, that these are criminals (SPOILERS except for the one that isn’t) and therefore the aesthetic is the only thing that makes them cool. But the aesthetic is not what they feel the need to copy. Oh dear.

Handsome "Punkle Stan" Jack

OT

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THE FUCKING RICK AND MORTY COURT CASE THING WAS ANIMATED BY A FAN WATCH IT.

Flyboy
Flyboy
5 years ago

They’re trying to look badass, but they’re crossing with the light. Couldn’t they at least have jaywalked?

Lea
Lea
5 years ago

I thought I was prepared.
I was not.

Sometimes in life you wish there were some sort of sign that you’re living life right, hope is justified and that unexpected rewards can lay just over the next hill.

*single tear*

Wishes really do come true.

reimalebario
reimalebario
5 years ago

@Alan

I just taught my colleague to open bananas that way (even down to the monkey-style explanation). She taught it on to another colleague and now we all do it. It’s the New Banana Movement! (NBM)

calmdown
calmdown
5 years ago

I had just watched the Rick and Morty animation today! It was amazing!

Alan Robertshaw
5 years ago

@ reimalebario

It’s the New Banana Movement! (NBM)

I’m in! Let’s take a lead from the monkeys, in all areas of life.

Of course we’ll probably regret this when it ends up with the Statue of Liberty up to her neck in sand.

@ citizen justin

eat the peel and throw the banana away

I do quite like eating orange peel; although I usually save the rest of the orange for later.

Handsome "Punkle Stan" Jack

I had just watched the Rick and Morty animation today! It was amazing!

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Jaygee
Jaygee
5 years ago

I too am glad that these silly dudes are spending their time on projects that don’t harm anyone and provide entertainment for the rest of us. I feel like the reason their movement seems so talentless is because talent requires effort, realizing your work is not always the best thing ever (that you can improve), and being able to take criticism w. If they already think they’re the best, they’re not going to get any better. So it could possible that their movement both attracts talentless people and their ideology squashes traits that contribute to talent.

On bananas: I’ve always peeled bananas by the black tipped end, never the stalk. So it doesn’t seem new to me at all. It’s the way my mom did it. (And my grandmother would eat the stringy part of the peel. This may have been a habit from living through famine in China.) I don’t think I’d encountered someone peeling it by the stalk until I was an adult (and I’m born and raised in California, though I can’t say my experiences are typical) though I can’t say I see people peeling bananas all the time. What I found weird was last year when a co-worker peeled off the banana peel completely and held it by the flesh to eat. He said he didn’t like the sensation if the peel draped over his hand.

vox
vox
5 years ago

You’re all crazy! The stalk is nature’s easy-open banana handle.

If we imitate monkeys, we’ll all end up throwing poo at each other. Is that what you want? A world full of poo throwing? I sure don’t!

Peel bananas the proper way and say NO to poo throwing.

BetaGater
BetaGater
5 years ago

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1t_Bs-8L4Mo

YES!!!

Oh… Icing on the cake.

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