no trolls allowed off topic open thread

Open Thread for Personal Stuff: May 2015 Dinosaurs Are Ruining My Life Edition

Those pesky dinosaurs!
Those pesky dinosaurs!

An open thread for personal stuff, continued from here. As always: No trolls, no MRAs/PUAs/MGTOWs/dinosaurs etc, be nice. Email the mods/me if shit gets weird.

190 replies on “Open Thread for Personal Stuff: May 2015 Dinosaurs Are Ruining My Life Edition”

Hey Auntie Alias. 🙂 Yeah, it’s good to be back. A lot of weird shit went down, which is why I’ve been vanished for a while. But here’s hoping I might be back!

I’m just sticking my toe in once in awhile. I hope to see you around.

Good to see you both! LBT, sorry (if unsurprised) to hear you’re getting backlash for that comic. It was a very brave thing to put out there. I think it’s an important conversation to start with your audience and it’ll help a lot of people.

LBT, are you back in Boston?

OMG what an adorable fluff ball! Thanks, Lea.


RE: Auntie Alias

Yup, back in Boston! Huzzah!

RE: katz

Yeah, turns out my folks are still stalking my online activity, and are now trying to use our younger brother as a chess piece. At least I realized I was being played, and managed to get out of THAT.

I hope the comic helps people. That’s the only reason I can stand to print and sell it. I’m still waiting for the inevitable troll who claims I’m making it up for the money and attention.

Aw, thanks gilshalos. I admit, this month has just been rough, between family backlash, some really bad memory stuff coming to light, and comics stuff. Oh, and trolls. Can’t forget the trolls, which is why I might end up quitting another site. It’s one of those places where if you respond to trolls, you’re considered the problem, and even though the mod is fast, it’s still pretty shitty.

I mean, I already know that the general public thinks I’m a delusional malingerer faking for the attention. But I’d like to be able to talk about books and video games without people popping up to mock me and trying to destabilize my sense of reality for the lulz.

@LBT and Auntie Alias, seconding gilshalos. Haven’t spoken to you much, but always happy when I see you guys post.

On an unrelated note, I haven’t posted much on the open threads but feeling a bit down this morning so meh. I fluffed another job interview last Friday. I think it’s my seventh or eighth one in a row in as many months, and it’s got to the stage where I don’t even tell people when I’ve got one anymore because it’s too embarrassing having to announce, again, that I stuffed it up, again. Groan. The interviewer on Friday said I had a lot of knowledge and passion for my work, but maybe with a bit more interview experience … and I thought, “You have no idea” . If I watch one more video, do one more Q&A roleplay scenario or come up with one more example to one more competency-based question, my brain is going to explode.

I’m starting to feel pretty desperate as I know every time I fail an interview, that’s another organisation I can’t apply back to, so the pool of potential employers in my field is rapidly narrowing down. I know I’ve got at least one more voluntary position in the pipeline to boost my chances … but then that’s going to be on top of the two voluntary jobs I already do, as well as full-time employment (long hours, awful pay). I’m so tired as it is, most days I can barely crawl out of bed, just to face another fourteen-hour day.

Sorry all, rant over.

Aw, Misha, that’s rotten. I wish I had a cure-all up my sleeve, but I don’t. I tend to get interview nerves too, especially if I really want the position. I’ve bolo’ed more than a few opportunities that way (I still mourn the job I wanted at my old college; I could feel myself blowing that interview while it was happening).

It’s frustrating that the last interviewer said that you’re great, but you just need to work on your interviewing skills. If zie can tell that you’re passionate and knowledgeable, why isn’t that enough? Job interviews are just weird.

I hope that things perk up soon. May the next position have a hiring manager who puts you right at ease and recognizes just how valuable you are. 🙂

It’s so stupid how much emphasis is put on interviews. From what I understand, interview performance is actually a terrible predictor of how well a person does his or her job.

It’s just so frustrating and demoralizing that getting a job depends mostly on networking and being good at interviews and nothing to do with competence or intelligence. I don’t understand why employers care more about how outgoing a person is than how well they do their job.

Is anyone here responsible for hiring and want to explain why so much emphasis is put on interviews and references when they’ve proven useless at determining job performance? Is it just the easiest thing? Habit?

WWTH, I think habit has a lot to do with it. Like standardized tests in academia, that test how well you take standardized tests. Interviews show how well you can interview. Since we’ve always done it this way, this is the way we’ll always do it. I have heard enough about the process to suspect that the person interviewing applicants knows more about that than the actual job requirements.

My last job interview was back in the XXth century, and I don’t miss them at all. I got my VA job because I was the only one who showed up in suit and tie; the job didn’t require you to dress like that, though. Had that job for twenty four years, so I must have been doing something right.

Hey, LBT! Good to see you as always, and congratulations on getting back to Boston.

I bought and installed Invicible Inc. today. Boy, this game is pretty much the ultimate MRA nightmare! 😀 Not only are there tons of female operatives in the game, who are just as good, nay, better than their male counterparts, but the head of the “company” is a veteran agent with grey hair! How dare Klei make a game where you have to take orders from a woman past her prime? 😀 I’m just so stoked to have a new toy to play with so I haven’t registered my shock over this yet…


I hope that everything works out for you! I’m so sorry to hear about the situation with your husband. I do hope that things work out as well as they possibly can. I have family history with cardiovascular disease, so I try to keep healthy and in shape. Emphasis on the “try”, of course, but I’ll touch wood. I send Internet hugs to you and yours, if you want them.

Ugh, interviews. There’s a reason hubby always fronted for those; he was a whiz at interviews. I think it came with the customer service abilities, being able to make quick and friendly connections with people. Since we mostly did low-end customer service jobs that involved lots of peopling, I always figured the interviewing was to see if we could get along with people and not be a total pain in the ass.

Welp, finally happened. I’d been waiting for it for weeks. Our granny called us saying that she’d heard “through the grapevine” (AKA: from our parents) that we are accusing them of abuse.

Never mind that I’ve never actually said that. Our comic is primarily about the incest we suffered from our aunt and grandfather. Our parents don’t come out looking good, because let’s face it, they told us about the grandfather’s predilections right before sending us on a road trip with him and the aunt in 2004. that led to one of us getting raped to death and another getting her head smashed against some furniture, choked, and THEN raped (though she survived). But our parents are still stalking our online activity (though I don’t think they follow our shit here, which is why I dare talk about it) and so they’re making sure to rev up the spin machine so nobody believes anything they might find from us.

I told our granny we hadn’t said that, and that was that. And I’ve been expecting this. Just. I wish I was able to deal with this without ALSO having to deal with the family backlash, and making myself okay with cutting off my brother and granny at a moment’s notice.

Good to see our parents are concerned for our well-being, I guess. I wish I had alchohol.

I’ve had several bombshells dropped on me over the past week. I don’t know if I can handle it all and I don’t know what to do.

1) I found out my stepdad is dying from cancer. He has a year or two left. I feel so guilty because I don’t even care that much. He has been emotionally abusive to me for years.
2) He is okay with dying because he hates me, my mom, and my sisters so much he can’t wait to be away from us. His reason for hating us? He never felt welcome because of things like we didn’t set the table the way he liked or cater to his every whim.
3) He thinks my mom cheated on him and my half-sister isn’t his. (Fortunately I don’t think she heard this part because she had left the room because she was upset.) He thinks she’s not his because she doesn’t look enough like him or his family. Well, of course she doesn’t. He’s white and my mom’s Asian, so yeah she doesn’t look like his white family. My mom offered to get a paternity test, but he said the results wouldn’t matter because he would never feel like she’s his. She’s taking the news really hard though, because she really looked up to him as her father. So I’m really worried about how she is doing. It’s so much for her to deal with and she’s only 15.

4) My younger twin sisters (who came out as trans about a year ago) are feeling so depressed and suicidal because society hates trans women so much. I don’t know how to help them.

I feel so useless but like I have to be strong for everyone else. I don’t know how much longer I can keep going. I just recently went through a tough time myself with a really bad breakup and I’m not strong enough. I lost most of my emotional support too after the breakup. I feel so alone

In a brief lighter moment.
Today is (Inter)National Bacon Sarnie Day!
Everyone eat bacon!
Veggie bacon is acceptable, because any kind of bacon make you feel better!
I have defrosted thick-cut bacon, and the bread machine is baking mixed grain bread. And mushrooms. (I might have slight hobbit-tendancies)

This is going to be peanuts compared to what many of you have been going through, but today on Facebook one of my childhood friends posted one of those dumbass #GamerGate memes…. and sure enough, he’s going on about “Literally who” and “Anita is making it up for attention” and all that familiar bullshit… Ugh…

Makes me sad because this was a guy I grew up playing video games with and was my closest friend for a while. 🙁

Gilshalos- thank you. I had a nice talk with a friend after I posted that and I’m feeling better. I guess it’s part of the emotional abuse but I tend to think that people don’t like me but I’m finding out that’s not true.

Moocow- that does not sound like fun! How are you handling it? I would be quite upset if that happened to me

Tonight I am eating steak, chips (fries), peas and onion rings.
Sounds good yes ? And one of my favourite meals
But I had to actively force myself to cook it.
Why do I have this issue with food ?

I used a little lemon infused oil, in cooking, and some soy sauce on the peas. Seems I’m a foodie even when having to force myself to cook/eat.

I know this is a long shot, but does anyone here play Pro Evolution Soccer 15, the Windows version? I finally bought a USB controller and downloaded this game for some football nostalgia. Having fun with the career mode, but I would love to play against a human opponent online. 🙂

Ugh, I was just stuck listening to the local radio for a few minutes and their caller spent the whole time rambling about paedophile priests (“The police are so mean. Jesus forgave them, why can’t we?”) and gay people (“The homosexuals need to be shot. Shot.”). If it wasn’t somebody else’s radio, I would’ve thrown it out the car window. =_=

@Panda Late but OMG Avenger pancakes are awesome!

Also, after being unipolar(depressive) for over 20 years, lately I have been having manic bursts. My Gp has referred me for a new assessment. He generally gets me fine, but seems to not get how I find the ‘depressive’ part of this new cycle comforting. Cos I know it, and how to deal with it, but ‘manic’ is crazy out of control. (crazy not used as insult but..well..I feel crazy when high)

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