Merry Christmas, if you’re into that sort of thing!

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1. Alas, it will very soon be time to take Spawn#1 to the station :-(((((

   It has been so great having them to visit for a few days. Also, xie just donated an old bottle of purple to me, so now I have a nice purple streak on one side. Also purple fingers.

   And #1 took #2 to get their first-ever haircut!!! yesterday, with outstanding results (their Other Parent has reservations, but #1 and I know better 😉 and #2 is generally very well-pleased. And it was even cheap and very local, too, so it would be easy to repeat in a couple of months if desired).

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2. @Kat
   @Axe
   @John

   You people are awesome. Thanks so much for taking the time to reply, especially, as I said, given the time of year. It’s particularly appreciated given that I know all of you have had complicated relationships in this area (putting it mildly).

   “biodad” is an excellent term and I would like to borrow it forthwith, please. Mine’s speciality has been neglect and distance, with occasional bursts of interest. For example, he’s my brother’s biodad too – and the whole time my brother was in prison he never once visited him (not quite as horrible as it sounds – we didn’t grow up with him as my mum left him when I was a baby).
   My stepdad is more complicated as he was a part of my life for some time, and he’s the biodad of one of my sisters, and she and I are close.

   Anyways, exit strategy and talking to a professional are absolutely excellent suggestions. I need to sort out how much of what I’m feeling is just obligation 🙂
   Thanks again – you guys are the bestest xoxoxo

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3. To be fair, I borrowed “biodad” from (I think) PI, because I sorely needed at least one name to call him that wasn’t a straight-up insult.

   Also, I just finished the side-quest with the “friendzooooned” conversation and it was glorious.

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4. We spent christmas with a couple who have adopted a child in an open adoption. They used bioparents (and biodad and biomom) as just normal words.

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5. Oh right, I’ve seen it used in that context as well.

   Hrm. Yeah, I’m gonna stop using it to refer to the waste of skin of which I am the offspring.

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6. @John

   I sorely needed at least one name to call him that wasn’t a straight-up insult

   Well, if ya come up with a better one, let me know. “Father’ is a nuisance to say, ‘Biodad’ has the adoption angle, and just ‘Dad’ will never feel right. Ya know?

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7. Hm. I’d never heard the terms biodad or biomum before, but that all makes sense. Cheers everyone.

   And @Axe, yes totally: ‘dad’ is not going to fly; ‘father’ is weird. I’m sticking with biodad for now 🙂

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8. I’m an IVF child, so there’s an easy one for me : “Just ’cause he jerked off in some jar doesn’t mean I owe him anything” but obviously that doesn’t work for everyone. (Now, anyone for whom it’s suitable, feel free to use it. It’s incredibly satisfying.)

   Though mostly I just stick to “that asshole”.

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9. @John,

   Oh, I didn’t know that (then again, why would I)? That’s actually fascinating.
   Sorry that the step-father is not exactly a huge improvement. At least your mum sounds wonderful.

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10. Hello.

    Coming back from holidays.
    I am sorry to be late, but i wish you all a merry christmas !
    I have not read other threads yet, so i hope you are all as fine as possible.

    Have a nice day.

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