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Captain Marvel haters’ devastating new takedown of Brie Larson: “She’s named after a cheese”

The existence of this cheese proves that Brie Larson is a terrible actress, somehow

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By David Futrelle

Angry superhero movie fans have discovered what they see as a deeply unsettling fact about the lead actress in the Captain Marvel film that hits theaters this Friday, whom they have collectively decided to hate because she thinks people other than white men should have some say in movie criticism, or something: Brie Larson’s first name is the same as the name of a popular French cheese!

Apparently this is all the more reason to hate her.

Eric B
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@Eric_Belleau
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@brielarson is an insufferable cunt. A below average actress at best named after a cheese.

Oh, but it gets worse: Some of them have given her unflattering cheese-based nicknames!

J.C. (the Creature) remembers Stan Lee
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Replying to @rizzydraws
Yeah. Brie Larson is scum. I like to call her "crazy cheese woman" because her first name is actually also the name of a type of cheese

Not only that, but the cheese in question is RUNNY!

patricia stewart
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@beesknees1960
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Replying to @RubinReport
And who can take a girl named after runny french cheese seriously? @brielarson just another SJW wannabe. stifle yourself birdbrain!

The dudes with NPC avatars are on the case:

Mark ™️
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Replying to @JoeNumbas
Brie Larson is so unlikeable, I’d take Brie Bella over her.. heck I’d take the cheese Brie over her

This fellow is struck by the irony that the cheese in question is WHITE.

Arqahn
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Replying to @MarvelStudios
Brie Larson (white woman named after white cheese) worried about too many white men involved with the movie publicity tour. In keeping with her wishes I hope white people boycott this movie.   
#boycott 
#WhitePrivilege

I was a little concerned that Mr Solo’s burn (below) wasn’t quite sick enough. But then I saw the crying-laughing emoji. BAM!

Dan Solo
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Replying to @RuinTheManbaby @brielarson
She is no star. She is a cheese

Then this bad boy with an Elon Musk wearing an eyepatch avatar kicked it up another notch by adding a thumbs-up emoji after the laughing-crying one. DOUBLE BAM!

Jon Brovi
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@tokemonbro
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Brie Larson is no Gal Gadot. Brie has the charisma and charm of mouldy french cheese. Hence the name

And get this: Some of Brie’s critics don’t even bother to use her first name — they just call her “Cheese Larson!” TRIPLE BAM! Fourth graders have nothing on these insult-slingers!

(((Val Washington)))
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Replying to @JackPosobiec
MARVEL WAS FULLY CREATED BY WHITE MALES: Stan Lee being the greatest if them all. Blonde Cheese Larson wouldn't have thus gig if a white male at Marvel hadn't approve this stupid cross dressed Captain Marvel. Why can't she be humble and thankful for the opportunity?
#stanlee
Noway Neophobic "Jeremy" loves Alita Battleangel
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Replying to @MrGournalist @desert_starr_57
I love WW. Shes an AWESOME Character. Like Alita.

But not this Matriarchy Bot Cheese Larson.

Damn, the crazy cheese lady is also a “Matriarchy Bot?” Wouldn’t the runny cheese gum up the gears?

I guess I probably shouldn’t try to think these through too much. Clearly the people posting them didn’t.

Regardless, it’s not clear to me if “Cheese” Larson will ever be able to recover from these devastating burns.

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Jenora Feuer
Jenora Feuer
3 years ago

@Cat Mara:
Ahhh, Escher Girls.

I do a lot of little conventions, and often commission artwork from people there. Since I like the artists to have fun as well, I usually go with ‘here’s a theme, draw whatever you like that fits that theme’. One of my books is all superheroes… and one (female) artist drew Nightwing in very much an ‘Escher Girls’ pose.

(Which is actually more appropriate for him than most of the people drawn in those poses, given that Nightwing, aka Robin I, aka Dick Grayson, was a circus acrobat growing up…)

@Alan:
I got called in for Jury Duty once and while I didn’t serve (the judge was mostly using the jury panel which had been convened for a different case but not needed as a threat to convince a plea bargain) the judge explained that the guy in question had two previous lawyers refuse to work with him and he had fired his own court-appointed lawyer. He was also a disbarred lawyer, which takes work. Most of what was on his sheet was contempt of court. (Basically, started with stalking and harassment of his ex-girlfriend and had extended to some 20 charges over the period of time since the initial incident.)

@Who?:
Yes, one of the things that keeps coming up with Comicsgate, Sad Puppies, and the like is that the people doing the loudest complaining about ‘recent’ ‘takeovers’ are also usually completely ignorant about the history of the field they’re in.

Really, the problem isn’t that people are making movies starring women. The problem is that the public consensus is that making movies starring women is a good thing and would probably be an improvement in an industry that could use a shakeup anyway. The problem is that the complainers can’t as easily convince themselves that they’re the silent majority anymore as more people feel unafraid to speak up and say they’re wrong.

Anonymous
Anonymous
3 years ago

This makes middle school insults look mature.

Anonymous
Anonymous
3 years ago

It’s not even as if female superheroes are remotely new, or that having female “spinoffs” like “supergirl”, “the bionic woman”, etc. is, either. Even sex change (of fictional characters at least) is as old as the ancient greeks.

Anonymous
Anonymous
3 years ago

Lost in all this is the simple question: is the movie any good?

So far it seems it is neither Womder Woman nor the ghostbuster remake – neither a great hit nor a lemon. The movie has a 6.4 rating on IMDB, 82% on rotten tomatoes, and 71% liked the film according to google.

So, it seems it’s a middle-of-the road rather standard Hollywood product, by all accounts.

(Shrug) I myself couldn’t be flayed to watch any superhero movie, so I don’t see what all the fuss is about, but still, for the record.

Frederic Christie
3 years ago

Who wants to bet that the racist fuck screaming that Marvel was made by white men doesn’t think Jews are white?

Specialffrog
Specialffrog
3 years ago

I saw Captain Marvel. It was good. Not as good as Black Panther but on the better end of Marvel movies. And while Wonder Woman had some great sections that aren’t matched by Captain Marvel it had some really clunky bits and I think Captain Marvel is better overall.

Scoots2
Scoots2
3 years ago

I think I liked Wonder Woman more, but I think that’s because I’m less into sci-fi than I am into fantasy. Once we get into space going “pew-pew-pew,” I kinda check out unless there is a cat involved. Fortunately…

It’s definitely worth a watch if you like superhero movies and the MCU, though. There’s a lot of origin myth here: not just of the individual character, but the overall universe. Plus, there is a cat. The cat is awesome.

And there is some definite feminist stuff and just plain woman stuff. The standard-butt “fight on top of a speeding train” is different when Our Heroine walks through the train cars, looking suspiciously at which passenger just might be a dangerous asshole. Because while the first is sort of action movie cliche, the second is real life, man. Also, gotta appreciate the solid Bechdel Test pass, more than one strong/interesting female character, and female friendship. The audience I was in was screaming approval by the end.

Plus, there is a cat.

Shadowplay
3 years ago

@Anonymous

Lost in all this is the simple question: is the movie any good?

Couple of the grandkids “took me to see it”* today as a belated birthday present.

By my lights, yes, it’s good. It’s entertaining, absorbing enough that you forget you’re watching a movie most of the time, a reasonable storyline for ones as haven’t obsessively read the comics and, most importantly – FUN.

Money well spent.

*As in, they really wanted to see it, and there were a perfect excuse for an adult to take them to the cinema just sitting there waiting to be used … raised a bunch of chancers, we have. 😛

kupo
kupo
3 years ago

So far it seems it is neither Womder Woman nor the ghostbuster remake – neither a great hit nor a lemon.

Interesting that you choose female character led movies for comparison. As if a woman starring in a movie puts it in a separate category and we must only compare it to other films starring women. Also interesting that you call Ghostbusters a lemon. 229 million on a 144 million budget is a lemon? What a success, in your eyes?

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