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The Searchers

Hey, you asked for it.

One of the many happy benefits of moving this blog to WordPress is that I can now see in gory detail the search terms people use to get here. The most common search terms are, naturally enough, “manboobz” and “man boobz.” It’s on the third-most-popular search term that things start to get weird: it’s “Australopithecus.”  Why? Well, because once upon a time I posted a picture of an Australopithecus couple going about their Australopithecus business.

Let’s take a quick tour through the rest of the search terms list. I think we can learn a few things, both about this blog and about the dreams and desires of people whiling away a boring afternoon at work by poking around the internet. Here are some preliminary conclusions I have drawn from the data:

1) The teeming millions want to look at dudes with lots of muscles:

world’s most muscliest man

most big muscle in the world

world’s muscular man

disgustingly big muscles

silly muscles

les muscle man end the world

And no, I have no idea what that last one means either.

Clearly, the prevalence of muscle-man related search terms is the side effect of having that little picture of a muscly man at the top of the sidebar in the blogger version of this blog. I feel bad that this was all I had to offer the searchers, so as you can see I’ve added a pic of a man with some, yes, ”disgustingly big muscles.”

2) Human sexuality is a weird, wonderful, and often horrifying thing. Sometimes, it involves advanced computer and/or robotic technology:

future lady robot

create a virtual woman with boobs

will cherry 2000 ever happen?

computer mouse in vagina

Other times, animals:

panda furry porn

animal dildo porn

fish meat and women porn movies

I am trying to get that last image out of my head.

3) If you regularly mention sperm on your blog, you’re going to attract a few weirdos:

how to steal sperm

do lizards like human cum

I just Googled that last one and this post of mine was the FIRST RESULT! I would therefore like to publicly state that I DO NOT KNOW THE ANSWER TO THAT QUESTION and have never even tried to find out the answer to that question. And if you by chance actually do know the answer to that question DO NOT TELL IT TO ME.

4) Angry dudes trying to find men’s rights sites can be careless typists:

why do you always here fiminist indoctorin at school but nothing about mens right activist?

women are like chilfren

A few final thoughts:

Many of the questions listed above are questions that are frankly best left unanswered. But there are some others I would dearly love to see answers to:

what do intellegent agressive beefcake nerds want

what does germaine greer think of buck angel

And one question I can answer pretty definitively:

can socially awkward men find love

Yes. The answer to that one is yes.

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Holly
11 years ago

NWOslave – Wow, you really can’t say anything good about men, or any supports or freedoms that men deserve. It’s still just all about the evil women.

You’re not pro-man at all. You don’t even seem to like men, let alone having put any thought into their needs or rights. You’re only anti-woman.

Snowy
Snowy
11 years ago

Goddamnit. That’s what I get for fooling around with html tags I guess.

@NWOslave

A man (you) is drunk, a man talks him into bed, he says yes. Was he raped?

I’m curious to know if you apply the same standards to yourself as you do to women. Because the last time I checked rape was less about “talking someone into something” and more about, you know, rape.

Amnesia
Amnesia
11 years ago

I would say both are technically rape.

NWOslave
NWOslave
11 years ago

@Holly…Oh no you’ve befuddled me with reverse logic. I can’t say anything good about men. Priceless. Seriously you need to do much better than that.

How about you Holly care to answer my questions?

How about another one just for you. Here it is. A woman is proven to have falsely accused a man of rape. Should she be punished, and if so what is that punishment?

Holly
11 years ago

You know what I would do if a woman falsely accused a man of rape?

I would be concerned about clearing the man’s legal record, about getting the man reinstated in his job if he was wrongfully fired, about the man’s financial support reentering the community from jail, about clearing the man’s good name in the media, about protecting the man from misguided vigilantes.

Charging the women with filing a false police report would be my second priority.

Do you give the first shit about men?

NWOslave
NWOslave
11 years ago

@Snowy…Well snowy you seem to be a bit shy in your knowlege of LAW. If a woman has been drinking, even one drink and she consents to sex, she can indeed claim rape. Can you imagine a man trying that one out in court. “Judge I was drunk so she raped me.” Holy fuck, he’d be a laughingstock. The judge would tell him to rush home so his mommy could change his diaper.

NWOslave
NWOslave
11 years ago

@Holly…Oh Holly ya got me agin! Incredible. However my question remains unaswered. Lets try it again. A woman falsely accuses a man of rape, does she deserve punishment and if so what shall it be?

You should be a crooked politician because you dance around without actually answering the question. Please try again.

law1204
law1204
11 years ago

Hyperbole aside, if you are accused falsely of a crime, you may bring a lawsuit against your accuser in a court of law for defamation. So the fact that there are no reprisals against false accusers is…a false accusation in and of itself.

ozymandias
11 years ago

I think there are some unanswered questions here!

1) Are both partners at similar levels of intoxication?
2) How drunk is drunk? Are we talking “unsafe to drive” drunk, or “passed out” drunk?
3) Did either partner say no at any point?

Holly
11 years ago

The woman should receive whatever the statutory punishment for a false police report is, with the judge taking into consideration the harm done to the man.

I’m not going to ask for some medieval “and then she should have to go down a slide of razorblades INTO A POOL OF LEMON JUICE” bullshit, but I would expect her to go to prison and/or owe the man a substantial judgement in a civil suit, yeah.

Bee
Bee
11 years ago

This conversation is gross beyond belief. I volunteer with rape victims. Sit in on the police interview sometimes. And you know what? It doesn’t happen like NWOslave imagines it does. Surprise!

Most people who are raped and report it are women. Most are marginalized in some way. They are usually: very young, very old, very poor, mentally incapacitated, homeless, addicts, sex workers, or disabled. They live in homes and are raped by caretakers. They live on the street and are raped by some dude who got mad because they won’t give up their cigarettes. They needed a place to stay, and the person who let them crash on their couch raped them. They are raped by abusive ex-husbands and ex-lovers who were able to weasel their way into the apartment. Give me a fricking break, NWOslave–you have no idea what you’re talking about, no desire to learn, and yet you’re still typing.

When we’re talking about (or, more to the point, prosecuting) men who rape drunk women, these aren’t men who have gotten the woman’s consent (or at least not in my experience). These rapists are taking advantage of a situation where they believe they don’t have to get consent, and their victim will not fight back (or if she does, it will be ineffectual) and will not press charges (and if she does, no one will believe her report). And that happens quite a bit, actually — that not believing the report bit. A lot of police do an excellent jobs, but at least some don’t. And sometimes the hospital staff doesn’t. People who have just been raped, once they realize how much they actually have to go through to file a report, and the likelihood that their attacker won’t be punished, often decide not to file.

Jesus. How privileged and removed from the world do you have to be to read about rape reports that weren’t followed up on and turn it into a story about the poor menz and how no one can be raped after they’ve taken a drink? Unbelievable.

NWOslave
NWOslave
11 years ago

@law1204…Well with a name like law1204 I’m guessin you know lots about that lawyerly stuff. Let me hep ya out with how thats workin out. I think there actually been a whopping 2 cases where a woman has actually been, what can one say, rebuffed for false accusations.

Average time served…0.0000000000001 seconds for false accusations.

Average defamation payment…0.0000000000001 cent for false accusations.

Yeeeeaaa, I’m guessing it’s not a real big deterrent.

Holly
11 years ago

That’s not literally true, though, NWOslave. If you’re just going to say things that aren’t true, go with “women are evil because of their collusion with the pink elephants,” which has about as much correlation with crime statistics and news reports as your figures.

And man, you’re at it again! You’re always at it: talking all about women being bad, and not at all, not sparing one sentence for defending men or advocating for men!

NWOslave
NWOslave
11 years ago

@Bee…Since you seem to know soooooo much about the situation. Perhaps you’d like to field a few of my questions that I’ve posted?

Heres a fun little site. http://human-stupidity.com/stupid-dogma/stupid-dogma/teenage-sexuality/rape-laws-no-due-process

NWOslave
NWOslave
11 years ago

@ozymandias….Only one party is drunk in either of the scenarios I presented. By law one is rape the other isn’t. Your thoughts?

Also no one, and I mean no one has answered my question on does a woman who blatantly falsely accuses a man of rape deserve pusishment and if so what shall it be?

Holly
11 years ago

I answered your question — the normal statutory punishment in her state for filing a false police report (plus obstruction of justice if she submitted false evidence or concealed real evidence), plus a civil suit by the man.

And then I talked about actually helping the man recover from all this, but you didn’t like that part.

NWOslave
NWOslave
11 years ago

@Holly….Please stop with the not caring about men. Do you really believe I can be so easily decieved?

Put it this way Holly, if the false accusations ceased because there was a punishment for trying to incarcerate a man. That is the root of the problem. Not golly gee, lets clear is name and wish him well. What? Don’t you care about men?

Seriously, please stop with the you care about men I don’t ploy. It’s not working. OK.

ozymandias
11 years ago

If one party is very, very drunk– the kind of drunk where they are puking and literally cannot make their own decisions and people should be drunksitting them– and the other is sober, then it is rape, regardless of the genders involved. I believe this is the idea of mainstream feminism.

NWOslave
NWOslave
11 years ago

@Holly…You answered nothing, the normal “punishment” for a woman who falsely accuses a man of rape is, “the case is dismissed.” There is NO punishment.

Stop with, oh golly! Lets all help the man get back on his feet. The question remains which you won’t answer because you just can’t bring yourself to punish a woman for any crime.

Holly
11 years ago

NWO – I care about men. I don’t know if you do or not. You seem weirdly reluctant to show it.

How hard would it be to say, at a minimum, “the woman should be flogged and have to swallow a porcupine whole and have to eat Satan’s poopy, and also the man should receive counseling and financial reparations”?

I know I’m harping on it at this point, but I’m just amazed how little you think about men. (And then you say “stop saying I don’t care about men!” but you never do seem to say “I care about men!”)

Rachel
Rachel
11 years ago

NWO – in both of your scenarios the determination of whether the drunk person was raped will depend on whether that person was intoxicated to the point of being unable to give consent. Both men and women have to give consent.

Holly
11 years ago

I said the statutory punishment, not the customary one (which isn’t actually that lenient but let’s not even go there), and I guarantee you no state has a statute saying women are exempt from Filing A False report or Obstruction of Justice.

Captain Bathrobe
Captain Bathrobe
11 years ago

Oh, Jesus H. Fucking Tap Dancing Christ on a Cracker and/or Pogo Stick! Can someone call NWO? His slave is loose again.

Rachel
Rachel
11 years ago

Also, a man falsely accused of rape has the same ability to seek legal repercussions against his accuser as any person falsely accused of a crime. And if, as you suggest, being found “not guilty” is the same as being falsely accused, then the person found not guilty should have a relatively easy time making their case as the standard of proof in the civil defamation case is significantly lower than the standard of proof in the criminal trial.

NWOslave
NWOslave
11 years ago

C’mon ozymandias, it’s mainstream feminism that wrote the laws on this. You know as well as I do that a woman can accuse a man of rape/sexual assault at the drop of a hat. Don’t pretend like you don’t know this.

Do all women do this? Of course not. But lets add up the numbers shall we? If theres a million a year, which is probably on the low ball side. In fourty years thats 40 million. Since there are 3 million “restarining orders” handed out a year, on a womans word, thats 120 million in fourty years. If there are a 1/4 million jobs given to women a year due to quotas thats 10 million in 40 years. If there are a 1/4 million sports/classes given a year to women due to Title IX thats 10 million in fourty years.

Do you see how the numbers are adding up? Thats a lot of disgruntled men. Since these numbers are now perpetual, can you not see how this will lead to a very bad ending? And this is just a tiny portion of the LAWS instigated and written by feminists. There really can be only one outcome to this situation.

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