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Is Jordan Peterson fan art a sign of the impending apocalypse?

Yes, that’s supposed to be Peterson

By David Futrelle

Some public intellectuals are so public that they inspire entire mini-genres of memes. One can find innumerable memes featuring the indomitable Marxist philosopher and hot dog fan Slavoj Zizek, left icon Noam Chomsky, and panopticon theorist Michel Foucault; even someone as seemingly memeproof as Susan Sontag has inspired a few. Lesser intellects like antifeminist think-tanker Christina Hoff Sommers and wannabe thinker Ben Shapiro have somehow inspired memes of their own.

Then there’s Jordan Peterson. The reactionary Canadian fussbudget psychologist has inspired more than his fair share of memes, of course. But he also inspires something more: actual fan art — paintings and drawings that have been fussed over for hours.

Some are near-photo-realistic portraits, skillfully done if not terribly original — most are copied or traced directly from photos circulating online. Though done with love and a great deal of earnestness, they’re not always what you might call flattering to Dr. P. (Click on any of the pics below to see the full-sized originals.)

The further they get from their photo originals, the weirder they become. This guy almost gets the head right, but he seems to have used a package of hot dogs as his reference for Dr. P’s fingers.

I don’t know what this guy was thinking; he’s clearly got some technical skills but the results don’t look much like Dr. P or anyone else in particular.

This alleged portrait of the not-so-good doctor looks more like a black velvet painting of some rockabilly artist no one’s ever heard of.

Here Dr. P looks a bit like a startled deer.

Here he looks about 14 years old:

The proportions in this one are so far off I can only conclude it was drawn while looking in a funhouse mirror.

Oh, they get weirder.

https://twitter.com/baxbooksdeux/status/1020073266323394561

… and even weirder than that.

In case you’re really taken with Zombie Peterson here, you can buy an 28″ by 28″ art print of him for the low, low price of $53.99 — reduced to $37.79 if you act by midnight tonight!!!1!!

But the strangest bit of Peterson fan art I’ve seen thus far has to be anime Peterson, complete with the requisite huge eyes and hair that seems to have been borrowed from Milo Yiannopoulos.

It’s the kind of art that makes you ask yourself WHY WHY WHY?

Look, I understand why people do fan art — if you’ve got the talent (and even if you don’t) it’s fun to draw pics of your pop star idols or your favorite characters from a show you love. It’s possible that when I was in college I might have drawn/traced pics of Prince and Adam Ant because, I dunno, I liked their music and thought they looked cool. But I was never tempted to draw pictures of my intellectual idols, who were decidedly less glamorous and, more importantly, it just would have seemed wrong somehow, at odds with the sort of skepticism and critical thinking that they promoted.

Drawing glamorized pictures of Jordan Peterson seems even more wrong. Idolized as a Great Thinker for our age, he’s actually a ponderous lightweight offering little more than reheated Jung mixed with assorted reactionary bromides. When he moves beyond the trite — “Clean your room” — he can barely write a coherent sentence to save his life. He’s a misogynist and a transphobe and a dietary crank.

Yes, I made fun of most of these pictures. But I’m much less bothered by the assorted artistic failures on display here than I am by the fact that these drawings exist at all. Peterson doesn’t deserve fans, much less fan art. Find someone or something better to draw. Might I suggest kitties?

Send tips to dfutrelle at gmail dot com.

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Bluecat
Bluecat
2 years ago

Re: Dr P in the garden of Eden – evidently he’d eat the serpent (with salt) and scorn the apple.

Cyborgette
Cyborgette
2 years ago

LOL @Kim, projecting much?

Gosh, what is it about JP posts that brings out all the trolls.

Mrs Obed Marsh
Mrs Obed Marsh
2 years ago

To the trolls: remember that Internet personalities are not your friends. They most likely don’t even know you. Going after everyone who criticizes them just makes you look like a cultist.

footprints in wet clay
footprints in wet clay
2 years ago

whenever these trolls come crawling out I can’t help visualizing a bunch of zombies, moaning about misaaaaandry and conteeeeext instead of braaaains.

occasional reader
occasional reader
2 years ago

Am i the only one who think the Peterson by Xiquip (the blue one) looks a bit like the Elusive Man from Mass Effect ?

Rhuu - apparently an illiterati
Rhuu - apparently an illiterati
2 years ago

I’m finding it super hilarious that all of the ‘DEBATE ME!!!!’* trolls always do drive by comments, and don’t stay to defend their views at all.

It’s almost as if they know that, in a space where any of the posters could notify the owner of the website that the trolls reached the point where they are more annoying than amusing and they would subsequently be banned, they aren’t interested in haranging people.

It’s super weird!

Also it doesn’t make *them* look very good that we know that 95% of the lobster ‘notice-me-sempai’ stans will never post a follow up, engaging with the community. I assume they are scared.

Big bad logic fans, unable to articulate how our critisms of J to the P are wrong. I think it’s probably because they have only ever talked about him with other indoctonated souls, or have won the ‘debate’ with the magic phrases ‘Out Of Context!’ or ‘Have You Watched All His Videos And Read All His Books?’

They always seem puzzled and offended when we point out that a ‘great communicator’ should be able to communicate his ideas oh, i don’t know, CLEARLY. Without needing 100s of hours of video to explain what should be a simple ass concept.

If you need someone to tell you how cleaning your room improves your life, may i recommend Mary Kondo? I have certainly found her ideas to be helpful.**

* i am making the pretty reasonable assumption that these same posters regularily get annoyed when people won’t debate them on, say, twitter.

** at the end of her first book, there is some fat shaming. She talks about how cleaning one’s living space frees one up to do other things they have wanted to do, and one example (iirc) was lose weight and ‘look healthier’.

I could have really done without that, Mary Kondo. 🙁

Allandrel
Allandrel
2 years ago

There’s a Kondo-based joke that I love:

Kondo: Does this item spark joy?
Me: No.
Kondo: Does this spark joy?
Me: No.
*Three hours later, in an empty house*
Me: Oh wait I have depression.

Violet the Vile, Moonbat Screech Junky
Violet the Vile, Moonbat Screech Junky
2 years ago

I’m upset I wasn’t in time for this thread.

We haven’t had a proper troll invasion for ages, and the one time they do show up I have to be in a meeting 🙁

Naglfar
Naglfar
2 years ago

@Violet
Thus far, all the trolls have been hit and run. You haven’t missed much.

Weasel-Rah
Weasel-Rah
2 years ago

Ironically, if Peterson was looking for an accurate “big bully male hoards all the submissive females for himself” archetype to follow, that is pretty much how sea lions do.

Robert
Robert
2 years ago

I spend more time on the r/JBP Reddit than is probably good for me *.If the regulars there are examples of how Petersonthink improves your life, I would run a mile in tight shoes to get away from it.

*I’ve long had a fascination with picking up big flat rocks and seeing all the squirming life underneath.

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